who dares wins.

there are very few men that helen park would ever willingly get on her knees for. adler was one of the lucky few, a new development through their working together, one she wouldn't have foreseen happening when she first met him. a welcome change, she decides now as she gazes up at him, and he looks back at her like there's no one else in the world.

her lips part easily at the caress of his thumb along her lower lip. a soft, hitched breath leaves her as his thumb settles heavy against her tongue. they shouldn't be doing this; they both know it. the mission is on the line with every second they spend on their lust for one another, while the man holding all their intel sits inside the building, unaware. but they deserve something for themselves, just this once, the rest of the world can wait.

doll; such a simple word, a demeaning one, had it come from anyone else, but from adler, it only sends a shiver along her spine. an endless need to hear more of such names for her comes from his lips only. deftly, she undoes his belt buckle before her fingers move to unzip his slacks. her fingers pause once more. she knows they don't have much time, but a few seconds won't hurt, right?

[ 1. ] sender steps between receiver and an aggressive stranger, voice low and steady: "walk. away."

[ 2. ] sender teaches receiver self-defense, hands firm on their hips as they adjust their stance.

[ 3. ] sender presses their forehead to receiver's, voice breaking as they murmur, "i don't know how to fix this, but i'm not leaving."

[ 4. ] sender shoves receiver out of the way of a projectile.

[ 5. ] sender combs their fingers through receiver's hair in the aftermath of a traumatic event, whispering words of comfort.

[ 6. ] sender whispers, “i’ve thought about this all day,” before pinning receiver against a wall for a searing kiss.

[ 7. ] sender wipes away the receiver’s falling tears with their thumb and whispers, “i’m here."

[ 8. ] sender patches up receiver's wounds, hands trembling as they whisper, "you can't keep doing this to me."

[ 9. ] sender shoves receiver into a hiding spot, hissing, "stay here or i’ll kill you myself."

[ 10. ] sender finds receiver drunk at a party, sighing. "let’s get you home."

[ 11. ] sender is discovered sleepwalking by receiver.

[ 12. ] sender steals receiver’s weapon and presses it to their own chest, daring: “go ahead. prove me right.”

[ 13. ] sender ‘accidentally’ flashes receiver while changing, purring, "see something you like?"

[ 14. ] sender whispers, "you’ll ruin me," before biting receiver’s lip hard enough to draw blood.

[ 15. ] sender takes over while receiver is giving themselves stitches, promising to handle it.

[ 16. ] sender frantically grips receiver by the shoulders, "don't you dare close your eyes."

[ 17. ] sender fixes receiver’s crooked [ tie / jewelry ], teasing, "nervous?"

[ 18. ] sender shakes receiver out of a nightmare, comforting them in the aftermath. "same nightmare again?"

[ 19. ] sender brings hot tea and medication to a [ hungover / ill ] receiver.

[ 20. ] sender invites receiver to dance with them, insisting, "what? this song's perfect."

[ 21. ] sender leaves a single rose on receiver’s windshield with a note: "you’re being followed. smile."

[ 22. ] sender pins receiver’s wrists during a sparring match, grinning, "yield."

[ 23. ] sender playfully steals something from receiver, initiating a chase. "come and get it, then."

[ 24. ] sender drapes a blanket over receiver, accidentally waking them. "sorry, go back to sleep."

[ 25. ] receiver returns home only to find sender already there. "finally."

[ 26. ] after a pleasant night out together, sender asks: "can i kiss you goodnight?"

[ 27. ] sender wipes the blood from receiver's face, murmuring, "let's get you cleaned up."

[ 28. ] sender shoves receiver against a vending machine to dodge security, breathless. "act natural."

[ 29. ] sender wakes receiver in the throes of a nightmare, reassuring them, "it's okay, it's not real."

[ TXT ] : why are you still awake?

[ TXT ] : hey, where did you go?

[ TXT ] : it's getting bad again.

[ TXT ] : guess i'll just sit in bed. alone. by myself.

[ TXT ] : you can't ignore me forever.

[ TXT ] : i can't stop thinking about you.

[ TXT ] : just saw i called you last night. how'd that go?

[ TXT ] : i really need someone right now.

[ TXT ] : we need to make plans asap.

[ TXT ] : have you seen the news?

[ TXT ] : you were blackout drunk.

[ TXT ] : testing to see if you blocked my number...

[ TXT ] : do you know anything about doing stitches?

[ TXT ] : just please let me know you're okay.

[ TXT ] : did you forget we had plans?

[ TXT ] : i know you see my messages, your read receipts are on.

[ TXT ] : meet me at [ location ], it's important.

[ TXT ] : do you need comfort, to vent, or a solution?

[ TXT ] : is there anything i should bring?

[ TXT ] : call me. please, it's important.

[ TXT ] : i can't sleep.

[ TXT ] : have you eaten today?

[ TXT ] : you are always going to be my priority.

[ TXT ] : i haven't seen you around in awhile.

[ TXT ] : i had a dream about you last night.

[ TXT ] : the names are gonna get mean if you don't text me back.

[ TXT ] : at the risk of sounding cliche, what are you wearing?

[ TXT ] : just say the word and i'll drop everything.

[ TXT ] : do you seriously not remember?

[ TXT ] : come to the front door.

[ TXT ] : have you been drinking?

[ TXT ] : how do you feel after last night?

[ TXT ] : are you up? please be up.

[ TXT ] : you looked beautiful today.

[ TXT ] : i have so much to tell you.

[ TXT ] : no one's heard from you. are you okay?

[ TXT ] : who is this?

[ TXT ] : are you taking care of yourself?

[ TXT ] : thought i'd reach out and see how you're doing.

[ TXT ] : i miss the taste of your lips.

[ TXT ] : that kiss was really nice.

[ TXT ] : stop acting so high and mighty.

[ TXT ] : i left my [ item ] at your place.

[ TXT ] : are we still fighting?

[ TXT ] : i need help and i can't go to the hospital.

[ TXT ] : are you thinking about me too?

[ TXT ] : call me, i wanna hear your voice.

[ TXT ] : i don't want to talk to you.

[ TXT ] : what do you have to lose?

[ TXT ] : you don't have to ask, i'm already on my way.

[ TXT ] : i want to take a nap on you.

[ TXT ] : even if you called 6 months later at 3am, i'd answer.

[ TXT ] : what's my name in your phone?

[ TXT ] : how's trying to forget about me going?

[ TXT ] : i have nobody else to ask.

[ TXT ] : what do you mean you're at the hospital??

[ TXT ] : sorry, i think you have the wrong number.

[ TXT ] : good morning! you up yet?

[ TXT ] : do i sense sarcasm in your tone?

[ TXT ] : you start your day at 2pm?

[ TXT ] : you need MY help?

[ TXT ] : stop texting me.

[ TXT ] : i'll leave that up to your imagination.

[ TXT ] : are you asking me to sneak out?

[ TXT ] : when will i see you again?

[ TXT ] : if you come over, i'll order us a pizza.

[ TXT ] : are we ever going to talk about it?

[ TXT ] : can you come get me out of here?

[ TXT ] : you mean like ... a BODY - body?

[ TXT ] : it's just been one thing after another lately.

[ TXT ] : forgiving and forgetting is harder than it sounds.

[ TXT ] : i want your legs wrapped around my head.

[ TXT ] : call me when you wake up.

[ TXT ] : what are you doing that's more important than me?

                Cigarette  is  almost  forgotten,  ash  falling  from  the  glowing  red  tip  as  he  stares  at  Bell.  And  for  a  good  long  moment,  too.  Finally  he  inhales  on  the  stick  before  it's  completely  ashed  once  more  and  forgotten  about,  glowing  for  a  moment.  Smoke  flows  from  nostrils  before  it's  plucked  from  lips  with  his  free  hand.  He  stares  at  Bell  as  if  he,  himself,  had  been  empty.  Nothing  on  his  mind  except  the  compliance  of  his  little  science  experiment.

bell refuses to look away from adler’s eyes or what he can see of them through adler’s aviators. afraid to look away as if doing so would mean fully submitting to adler, like he was some kind of animal and not man. bell feels more like a pet sometimes, it’s a feeling he can’t ever explain, can never bring himself to voice, but deep down he feels it. maybe it goes hand in hand with being locked in the safe house all the time. maybe bell is just going crazy.

finally, bells gaze drops to the dying cigarette in between adler’s lips. there are several thoughts coursing through bell’s head, all jumbled together and hard to make sense of. his mind is at war with itself, torn between blindly following adler’s command to roll over and to tell adler where to shove it. and even with his anger, and the mental break that started all of this, he almost wants to give in.

                It  wasn't  unusual  for  these  little  outbursts.  In  fact,  Adler  was  quite  prepared  for  them,  always  on  edge,  ready  to  gain  control  of  the  situation  if  need  be.  Thank  god  it's  always  been  in  convenient  places.  He  thinks  it's  because  Bell  has  too  much  to  think  about  in  the  safe  house.  It  was  dangerous  for  him.  Not  that  any  of  them  had  been  careful  enough  to  hide  the  obvious  tell  tale  signs  of  his  brain  washing.  Maybe  if  they  had  done  a  better  job,  it  wouldn't  happen  so  often.

                Door  is  flung  open  to  the  makeshift  lab,  Bell  is  shoved  inside.  Adler  follows,  and  with  a  swift  nudge  of  his  foot,  the  door  closes  behind  him.  One,  two,  three  steps  before  he's  on  one  knee,  digits  wrapping  around  the  column  of  his  throat.  Cigarette  safely  trapped  between  lips.  He  spoke  around  the  damn  thing  like  it  was  a  part  of  him,  meant  to  be  there.

the safe house feels like a cage, bell's mind right along with it. he feels like he's trapped beneath a cave collapse, where the sun peaks through the slivers of rock, teasing at the world outside. so close but so fucking far from freedom. he's sure that he's the only one who feels this way, no matter how many times he's told certain memories being fuzzy is normal, or that he's just overly tired; none of these half-truths comfort him.

it's when the glimpses of an almost past life reveal themselves in the cracks of bell's mind that things go south. the overwhelming sense of anger, the hyper-violence he feels building under his skin until there's no pushing it back down, bell's a ticking time bomb waiting to explode. the darkroom is in disarray, and park will likely sport bruises in a few hours from the latest break before adler got to him. bell's anger is almost always exclusively aimed at park and adler. his brain is only half capable of remembering why.