this is a clowncar

it’s so hard for me to listen to heartbroken/angry breakup songs by straight men bc no matter how good the song is i’ll be like i’m not sure if i fully believe you. let’s hear her side of the story.

they should invent a high ponytail that doesn’t give me a headache and they should invent a low ponytail that doesn’t make me look like a miller’s apprentice going off to enlist in the continental army

reblog if you love ao3 exactly how it is and you don’t want it to “update” or change in any way♡

my beautiful wife, severe thunderstorm warning, is texting me 😌😚😍😍

People who are making posts telling us what is happening over on threads, twitter, and Instagram are like war correspondents sending us reports from the front.

(repeated like a mantra while rubbing my temples) i will stay silly and not allow the world to make me bitter and cruel. i will stay silly and not allow the world to make me bitter and cruel. i wi

when the song tackles you to the ground and starts beating the ever loving shit out of you

i want to be held against a man's muscular chest and pet like a cat please thank you

do not underestimate my ability to burn it all to the fucking ground