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the pounding on your front door got louder with every second you left it unanswered. you had a faint idea who might be behind it, so you weren’t exactly rushing to open it up.

“alright, i’m coming!” you yelled, then after fiddling with your keys for a few more seconds, you finally opened it. your senses didn’t fail, behind the door it was taehyung, your noticeably pissed off boyfriend. you can’t get a word out, he’s already barged in, standing in front of you with both hands on his waist.

“sure, come right in.” you close the front door and face him, arms crossed in front of your chest.

“what the fuck was that text y/n?!”

oh, yes. the text. the two of you had quite a big fight a few days ago, which resulted in him storming out of your apartment in the middle of the night. he has been ignoring all your calls and messages ever since, therefore in order to get his attention, you had to get a little creative. so you had the genius idea to send him a text, which suggests that you had fun with someone last night and you would like to do it again, and make it look like it was meant for someone else. and after half an hour of sitting around, staring at the message, you hit send eventually. your efforts didn’t go in vain, cause he replied within minutes. gotcha, you thought before hitting him with the “oh, sorry, wrong number.” that sentence definitely set your plan in motion, cause he’s here, and he’s talking to you, although it’s not about making up. not yet, at least.

“it was nothing, forget it.” you reply, trying so hard not to smile.

“nothing?! do you, perhaps, need a reminder that we’re still together?” his eyebrows raise in confusion as he takes a small step towards you. he is a bit intimidating, but good god, he looks so attractive.

“no, but you might!” you quickly shake away your wondering thoughts and focus on settling this conflict, cause it’s been bothering you. and you were hoping that he feels the same, he’s just too stubborn to make the first step.

“me? i’m not the one “having fun” with others.”

his words hit you so hard, you drop your act almost immediately. “did you really think that i— oh my god, taehyung!”

“what the fuck was i supposed to think after that text, huh?!” you bury your face in your hands, realizing just how stupid this whole plan was. now you have to come clean, and he might not even believe you. you take a deep breath and raise your gaze to meet his, that’s eagerly waiting for an explanation.

“it wasn’t meant for anyone else, it was meant for you, all along.” he doesn’t seem to understand, so you continue. “i sent that text to get your attention.”

you break the eye contact, looking down at your feet. you feel ashamed and pathetic and his piercing gaze is not exactly helping. the few second of silence that falls on the room feels never-ending and suffocating. you want to say something but you can’t even bring yourself to lift your head, let alone talk. he breaks the overwhelming quiet with a relieved sigh. you can feel him get closer to you, one hand grabs your waist, the other slips under your chin, forcing you to look at him.

“it worked, i guess.” he smiles, faintly.

“why were you ignoring me?”

“cause.. uncertainty was better than accepting the fact that you might want to end this… and then you sent me that text today, and i just… i thought you moved on.”

“oh, tae..” you almost break down crying when you realize what you did. he wasn’t mad, like you thought, he was just scared of losing you, and you just fueled his concern.

“i would never do that to you.”

you bring your arms up to cup his face but he precedes you with the act and before you would even realize it, his lips are crashing against yours. you don’t waste so much time either and kiss him back immediately, one hand running through his soft, dark hair, while the other wraps around his shoulders so you can pull him closer. seconds turn into minutes like this and you get so lost in the moment that you forget why did he came here in the first place. after slowly separating, you are standing there, with both hands intertwined, foreheads still touched together.

“i don’t even remember what we were fighting about.” taehyung says, raising his head a little so he can look at you.

“probably something stupid.”

“and you sent me that text to get my attention? that was the only reason?” he changes the subject, you can tell that it’s still bothering him.

“well.. not really.” you reply, but seeing that look on his face makes you regret it a little, so you quickly add, “you look hot when you’re pissed off.”

he sighs in relief, shaking his head, then looks back at you with the most beautiful smile you’ve ever seen. “you make me crazy, you brat.”

“i love you.”

you stepped out of the operating room, wiping the sweat off your forehead and taking off your mask so you could finally breathe again. the rest of the interns and nurses were all patting your back and congratulating you on yet another successful procedure, so you bowed and nodded, thanking each and every one of them with a polite fake smile on your face. you couldn’t care less about that now, all you had in your mind was the soft clean sheets in your comfortable bed waiting just for you. you’ve been up for almost twenty-four hours now, running on the cheap and disgusting coffee some random intern brought you. you hated it even more, knowing that he only brought it cause he wants to suck up to you and get a place in the OR. little did he know, that won’t make him any better in your eyes. you were an intern too once, working your ass off to get into surgeries, studying day and night to get high scores on your exams. them, just like you did, have to learn everything the hard way, cause that’s just how life works at seoul national university hospital. though, it’s worth mentioning that you weren’t just simply hardworking, you were kind of special too. usually, an internship lasts for three years before you get promoted as a resident - well, if you pass the exam of course - but in your case, as a token of your hard work and continuous high scores, you were handpicked by the attending general surgeon for early promotion. so being almost the same age as the new interns, they thought you would be a little softer than the other residents and attendings. well, outside of work you definitely were, but not at the hospital.

by the time everyone was done congratulating you, you already changed from your scrubs, leaving the locker room as soon as possible. you walked with your head down so you could avoid any further encounters with… well anyone, really. you were hungry and exhausted and in desperate need of a shower. luckily your apartment wasn’t too far from the hospital and the walk home even helped you to feel a little more alive again.

all you could think of on your way home was the good night’s sleep you were gonna get as soon as your head touched your pillow. the soft sheets hugging you, the dark, quiet room, and the faint smell of lavender to help you relax. you let out a small chuckle as you locked the door, feeling a little embarrassed about how excited sleep can make you these days. you reached your hand out to switch the light on but before you could, an arm grabbed your wrist out of nowhere, dragging you into the darkness. panic took over you immediately, your heart pounding like crazy, chest aching from lack of oxygen, tears building up in your eyes. you wanted to scream from the top of your lungs, hoping that a neighbor would hear you, but a hand shut your mouth tightly before you could let out a sound. you tried to fight, muffled whimpers left your covered lips, but the more you fought, the more the stranger’s arms tightened around your helplessly feeble body.

“calm down, it’s me.”

as the familiar voice, which is barely more than a whisper, hits your ears, suddenly everything starts to be clear, everything starts to make sense. of course that’s not a stranger in your house, that would make zero sense. taehyung showing up in the middle of the night however, that’s not new. you roll your eyes, first cause you feel slightly embarrassed of your heavy reaction. though it wasn’t totally out of place, it kind of feels like it now. second, because you are once again cursing the day you first met this man. you were walking home after one of your shifts, cutting through a sort of abandoned alley to reach home faster. that’s when you saw him. sitting on the ground, his back against the wall, cuts and bruises all over his body. every other person would’ve probably ran the other way, but not you. you took an oath and as scary and as irresponsible your next steps were, you weren’t about to break it. not fully, at least. after checking if he’s still alive, you wanted to call an ambulance and just move on, but he stopped you. he was barely conscious, his voice was so weak you barely understood it, but for some reason, you put your phone away. you knew it wasn’t the right thing to do, but he begged you not to call anyone or it will just get worse. you weren’t sure what he meant by that exactly, but decided to trust him. but you couldn’t just leave him there either. you helped him up and dragged him all the way home with you. you cleaned and treated all his wounds and spent half of the night praying that he wouldn’t die on your couch. you don’t know when did you fell asleep that night but by the time you woke up the next morning there was no sign of him. you thought you would never see him again. and you didn’t, not for a whole week, but then he showed up at your door at three in the morning, beaten half to death, saying he had nowhere else to go. this has been going on ever since. although you find out this and that about him during these fixings, you never asked him what he’s doing to end up like this. not that you weren’t interested, but you figured it’s better if you don’t know. one less thing to worry about. cause as much as you wanted to avoid it, somewhere during these late-night visits you started to care about him. maybe it was the fact that he seemed so alone and lonely, or the small things you found out about him which made you realize that he’s not a bad guy, or maybe it was the fact that he cared about you too, in his own way. at least you liked to think he did. eventually, he started to appear in your life more and more, and not just when he needed your help. he would randomly show up every once in a while after your shift to make sure you got home safe, or he would - not so - anonymously send you lunch or flowers, or lunch and flowers with a small note attached to them, thanking you for saving his life, once again. something you will have to do again today. him being here means only one thing: he’s hurt.

he probably felt your body relax cause he slowly removed his hand from your mouth and let go of you, now that he made sure you won’t scream. after wiping the tears that rolled down your face thanks to the mini panic attack you had, you want to turn on the lights, but taehyung stops you once again.

“don’t. i might’ve been followed.”

you take out your phone and with the help of its dim light you walk up to the windows, close the curtains and the blinds and switch on the standing lamp next to your couch. without saying a word, you drop your handbag and your coat on the floor, kick off your shoes and head for your emergency kit. since he refuses to go the hospital, you made sure to have everything you might need at home. the procedure is always the same: first, you remove his blood-soaked shirt and jacket, then you stop the bleeding. after the bleeding stops, you clean and disinfect all of his wounds, stitch them together if needed, then you wrap them all up in bandages. he’s usually in too much pain and too exhausted to talk while you work, but today, as you’re putting up the last bandages he gently grabs your arm.

“you’re quiet. more quiet than usual.” if he doesn’t mention it, you probably wouldn’t have noticed that you haven’t said a single word until now.

“i’m tired.”

“i’m sorry, i didn’t want to bother you again, i just—”

“you had nowhere else to go, i know.” you finish his sentence in a robotic-like voice, “you’re not bothering me, it’s just… i’m tired, that’s all.”

that wasn’t exactly what you wanted to say. you were tired, that’s true. he wasn’t bothering you, that’s also true. but there was something else as well. you just didn’t know how to say it.

after you were done patching him up, taehyung fell asleep on your couch. you put away the emergency kit and the clothes you dropped to the floor earlier, made dinner and took a quick shower, all while continuously checking if your patient is still breathing or not. changing into something comfortable, you claimed your usual spot on the floor, beside the couch where you could keep an eye on taehyung. at this time you would usually read or watch a random show on tv, something that doesn’t require much attention, since it was all preserved for the man sleeping on your couch anyway. every minor movement, any small change in his slow and steady breathing and you already felt your stomach drop, preparing for the worst. during those time you swore to yourself that it will be the last time you helped him but then you did it over and over again.

now instead of facing your tv, you sat down facing taehyung. you placed both your arms on the couch next to him, leaning your head on them. as you sat there, watching him quietly, it didn’t take long for you to fall asleep as well. you never let yourself fall asleep before, you always had to be alert in case something happened. cause anything could happen. without proper tools and examinations, there were a hundred of different things you could’ve missed while treating him and that thought never let you shut your eyes. not before tonight.

you woke up to the faint sound of taehyung’s painful moan and that was more than enough to get rid of your sleepiness. you rubbed your eyes in order to see more clearly and almost instinctually went to grab your kit.

“what’s wrong?”

“i moved too quickly, i think i ripped one of my sutures.” he doesn’t even need to finish the sentence, you can already see it from the bloody bandage. you remove it gently, applying pressure to the wound to stop it from bleeding.

“the wound is deep, tae, please let me take you to the hospital..” you suggest, though you know it’s pointless.

“just stitch it back together.”

“there might be more internal damage or bleeding, i can’t just leave it like that.”

“no hospitals.” he seems upset about your attempt, his tone is intimidating though he doesn’t say anything else, and you just want to yell at him for being so stubborn and unreasonable, but instead you just bite your tongue and get to work. you feel angry and terrified, yet your hands are as steady as ever. you manage to keep it together until you finish the suture, but as you place the clean bandage over the wound you feel the tears burning your eyes. you hurriedly wipe them, but you’re not fast enough.

“hey, everything okay?” his voice is much more softer now, it’s like different person is talking.

“i can’t do this anymore. i can’t just sit around and worry if you make it through the night.” you can’t hold it back anymore and start crying, “every time you step out of the door i worry that you might never come back. and as much as i hate to see you like this, bloody, bruised and in pain, at least you do. at least i know you’re still alive and i… i haven’t lost you.”

you bury your face in your palms and let all those bottled up emotions break free through your falling tears. you finally said it, out loud. you were terrified of losing him. he wasn’t exactly your friend, you barely even knew him yet you felt devastated just by thought of having to live without him as a part of your life.

suddenly, you feel taehyung’s fingers on your wrists slowly taking your hands away from your face.

“come here.” he says, pulling you to him while pushing himself up in a half-sitting position. you climb up next to him on the couch, wrapping your arms around his middle, and placing your head on his chest. he puts one arm around your shoulders, softly caressing your head, while pressing small kisses on your forehead while you cry all your sorrows out.

“i don’t know what it is that you’re doing, but i want you to stop. i know, i’m just a nobody and i can’t tell you what to do, but please, stop getting hurt.” you say after a few minutes, looking up at him with teary doe eyes.

“my sweet girl,” he says, with a faint smile, “you are the only person on this planet who still cares about me. you are not a nobody, you’re my everything.”

you keep opening and closing your mouth to say something but not a single sound comes out. his last sentence caught you pretty off-guard. thousands of thoughts are running through your mind, causing you to just stare at him with eyes wide open, unable to react in any other way.

“you heard me right.” he wipes away your remaining teardrops and tucks your loose hair strands neatly behind your ear, “and about the things i’m doing… it will be over soon. i won’t bother you anymore, i can disappear completely if you want.”

“no!” you exclaim, and it comes out a little harsher than you intended, “i mean… you shouldn’t.. disappear completely. that’s not what i want.”

he bites his lower lip, looking down at your flush-cheeked face with a smirk and raised eyebrows. “no? what is it that you want, then?”

“you.”

the next move you make is something you’ve never thought you’d do, especially not with taehyung. carefully, not to touch any of his wounds and accidentally hurt him, you climb into his lap, wrapping your arms around hid nape. with your eyes locked in with his, you take a deep breath.

“i want you.”

“i’m all yours.” he says, and before you could do as much as blink, his lips meet yours, his arms wrapped around your waist to pull you closer, getting rid of every inch of space that might come between the two of you. deepening the kiss, your lips move together in a steady rhythm, his hands roam your body from your head down til your thighs, his touch sending shivers down your spine. yours slip in his messy, dark hair, earning a soft yet low growl from him. the outside world ceases to exist for both of you right now. there’s nothing else, just you and him, getting lost in the moment. and each other.