shut your mouth boy *beheads you with a talwar*

a severe thunderstorm warning that doesnt follow through is worse than orgasm denial

donald tlump or taylor swift just died of applesauce poisoning

*sees your post, takes cigar out of mouth and rubs forehead* dont make me unfollow you, kid

my body knows something that i don’t and i can’t get her to talk to me

at the bus stop showing a stranger the picture of the devil that I keep in my wallet

“Did the journal factory explode?” Yes because I bombed it. #PutYoBusinessOnTheInternet

play toys ?

come play toys

the prince of darkness commands you

"I am the Sword of God" is like easily top 10 things to declare immediately before doing something really stupid that will probably injure you

I just blocked someone for saying girls and men in the same sentence. Strict as fuck over here idgaf

music used to be about real things. like living in a yellow submarine with all of your friends

(as i scroll through tumblr looking at all the posts) hmm… beneath me, beneath me, juvenile… petty and childish… beneath me… this one is good. beneath me, juvenile, beneath me