Your birth is a mistake

"You’ll find that my ears are always open to pleasantries, Mr. Callaghan," Vivien said, tossing her hair over her shoulder in a smug manner. She smirked when he said birds of a feather, as if he or anyone else could possibly compare to her. Though, he wasn’t entirely wrong. If anyone could match her wit, relish for drama, and total, loud, unashamed narcissism it would be this man. She appreciated their banter, a lot more than the exchanges she shared with most other people in her life. “Even if I grow to love you, as self assured as you are, and as much as I doubt that - know that I will never love you half as much as I love myself. You may find that a rather large character flaw, however, one I think we both share.” She crinkled her eyes back at him and matched his lean forward before adding, “I don’t need you to teach me. I’ve gathered quite a few in my life. And I think what works for you is that perfect mixture of charm and attractiveness coupled with an apathy that inspires others to work hard to win your affections, like if they just try hard enough you’ll abandon who you are and fall head over heels. It’s a game they can’t win but they love the tastes you give them and they just fall at your feet. That, and you’re good at being nice, at leading them to believe you’re nursing a much softer side underneath it all. If I’m wrong or I’ve missed something, please, feel free to enlighten me.”

"As are mine, Miss Gray. I will keep that in mind if you will." Julian smiled, nose crinkling slightly as he watched the redheaded woman in front of him. "I don't think it will be too hard for you to 'grow' to love me, as you so delicately put it. It's already happening and it's beyond your control. I command it when I walk into a room." He continued, half joking. "But you would be correct, Vivien, in your assessment. I will never love a single thing more than I love myself. And it's not something I let very many people in on. I try to be like other people and love selflessly but I was simply not wired that way." He folded his arms across his chest, listening to her intently as she described how he easily garnered his 'pets'. "Correct, correct, correct. All of the above. Perhaps if you were better at pretending, you'd have more than a couple pets. You might even find one here... if you peeled your eyes."

Disappointment intensified over her delicate features the more he spoke. The last thing she wanted to hear was his guilt over the exchange. It was exactly what she thought; after seeing him at his lowest she managed to make things worse. It was a blow to her already softened ego.  Taking a surveying glance around she took a step closer not wanting anyone  overhearing their discussion, or give the impression they were having a disagreement. Shaking her head she appraised her bare feet for a moment feeling the grass between her toes before verbalizing her thoughts. “There was nothing shameful in what we did, and I can probably tell you that every day for the rest of my life, but you would still choose not to believe me. I don’t know if you need me to apologize, or if you want me to forgive you. Please just tell me… either way…I can’t be like this with you. We can’t walk around each other being only apparitions.  I won’t accept it.”  Hoping to show her sincerity she raised her eyes to his deep browns before offering up her thoughts to their disproportioned relationship. “I don’t blame you for doubting my capabilities after hiding my mother’s death for so long.  I know I’ve a lot of ground to regain with both you and Grace, and I will.  The fact that you won’t turn to me when you need someone… upsets me, but I understand given after everything I’ve done. I’m just going to have to prove you can trust me, and I’m strong enough… perhaps in time I will, Julian.” Her entire speech was made in a hushed tone, as tears threatened to fall from her eyes.          

Julian shook his head. In his attempts to explain himself to her, he'd only offended her more. "Becca!" He put his hands on her shoulders and gently shook her. "It isn't you. It isn't anything you did... It's me. I see myself as something of a paternal figure to both you and Gracie. If I kissed Grace, what would you think? It's wrong, right?" He shook his head again, taking a step back from Becca as he averted his gaze and ran his hand over his cheeks and mouth then his wrinkled forehead and through his hair. "Don't you get it? I crossed a boundary I had put up myself. I'm disappointed in myself. Not in you. It's me... Just... know that I love you and I think you are a brave and intelligent and incredibly strong woman."

Loyal was right, though she wasn’t even sure if he was aware just how loyal she was to him, not that it mattered. One day he would. Brows lifting as he continued, Ember wasn’t entirely sure how to take that. Had he just compared her to a dog? Like she’d come at his beck and call and would never think to step out of line? On the other hand, it was flattering to think that he had so much faith in her to believe that she would always be there. Even if he was right, because she would. “Oh, and if I was to whistle, would you as my partner come back as well?”

Julian sensed she might be slightly offended by what he'd said but that didn't cause the smile on his face to falter in the slightest. "I don't know... I've never been very obedient." He responded with the crinkling of his nose.

"She only has a truck... it can't be that full of liquor. It will run out sooner than later. Especially since she had the alcoholic living with her. Sad to have seen him go." He sighed and closed his eyes to the kiss, smiling a little as he lifted his arm up and angled it behind his head so the back of his head was resting on his flat palm. "It would... it's moments like this that keep me going, honestly."

Who: Julian Callaghan & Becca James

Ember came up behind him as he finished his speech and stepped away from the spotlight of the camp, grinning as she ran her hands up and over his shoulders, bring her lips to press against his neck, just below his ear. “Have I ever told you how sexy it is when you get all authoritative?”

Julian smiled slightly at her, the hairs on his arms standing up as she kissed the space where his ear met his neck. He shivered slightly and turned to look at her. "No... but I wouldn't mind hearing it again."

Mei crossed her arms as the man began to spoke. From the authoritative attitude and voice, she could easily identify the man as Julian. He was calling for volunteer guards, and it was the perfect time to introduce herself. She approached him, not wanting to speak loudly and advertise her skill set. Might as well keep the CIA history a bit of a mystery.

Julian looked at the woman in front of him without a trace of recognition. He held out his hand to shake hers, "Hello, Mei Song. I'm Julian Callaghan." He wrote her name down on the roster and blinked slowly, looking back up at her confusedly. "What? CIA?" He chuckled and shook his head, underlining her name in his roster. "You'll come in handy, won't you? Thanks, for volunteering, I appreciate it. Any particular shift you'd prefer?" Julian asked as he looked back up at her.

"Oh, now you’re taking all of the fun out of things,” Vivien whined, standing and walking over to him. “If we’re doing guards now, I have a list of demands. First, a proper throne - I’m thinking something ornate and made of solid gold? It’s negotiable. Second, two guards positioned on either side of me 24/7 - very fit and scary looking, must be willing to sacrifice their lives for me. Third, someone pleasant to feed me fresh grapes whenever I call. Would you like to volunteer for that position?” she asked with a playful wink.

"Well, if you consider having your throat slit fun... I feels orry for you." Julian answered with a weak little smile which was quickly replaced with a broad, genuine grin -- his eyes crinkling in the corners. "You're going to make me laugh when there's serious business going on, here?" He chuckled. "Sure, if we can find some fresh grapes, I'll feed them to you. Sound like a deal?" He shook his head, happy to have her there to make him feel at least slightly better.

Shane was taking Lexus apart, a sort of distraction, when he suddenly heard Julian’s voice. He ignored it at first. It was better this way to just ignore it. But then he heard ‘volunteers’, and he shoved the bullets back into place. He turned around and started walking towards him as he slipped Lexus under his shirt and behind his back.”If I’ll be able to kill the fucker who slit Luke’s throat, this way. Fucking find him and kill him? Then I fucking volunteer.” He stopped in front of him.”I’ll do this, but only for Luke.” he said in a serious tone.

Julian really wasn't surprised to see Shane walk up and try to play the hero. "Shane... you'd be a great asset, a wonderful person to take guard, but I'm not looking for headhunters. If you're serious about taking the position of keeping watch, then I'll put you down on the roster. This is not an excuse to go using your muscle to get information out of people or, heaven forbid, shoot anyone." He paused to look Shane over. He knew the younger man must be hurting for his friend and he sympathized with him. Julian put his hand on Shane's shoulder and gave it a gentle squeeze, speaking more softly this time. "I would really like your help. But you have to stay focused. Violence begets violence. We don't need any more killing."

Vivien beamed as he complimented her. “Please, continue. Oh, you’re done? Well, for a moment I thoroughly enjoyed spending time with you, too,” she joked, raising her eyebrows at him. She decided then to perch delicately on the seat next to him. “So confident that I will enjoy reading your work, hmm? I rarely have nice things to say, if you haven’t noticed. I’m hard to impress.” She exhaled sharply when he said not sure you deserve it and laughed a tiny, soft laugh. “Oh, darling, don’t you see? I deserve everything. I wonder what is in that head of yours you could teach me.”

Julian laughed, "For now, I'm done... I might have more for you later, though. So, keep your ears open." He was enjoying himself in her company more than he did with most of the other campers and was silently grateful for her arrival. She was just the right amount of sassy and high-class to fit right in with him. "Absolutely confident. Wouldn't you be if you were presenting something you'd created to me? Birds of a feather." Julian shrugged as if it were that simple. "I'm not trying to impress you, I just know you're going to love me." He beamed, "I like that mentality. I feel the same way..." He narrowed his eyes playfully at her and leaned in. "I could teach you how to get your very own pet."

"Flattery is greatly appreciated? In that case, you are very handsome and I bet you are quite a brilliant writer. Anything you think is particularly good, you should send my way. I warn you, I’m very picky. And I would hate to be disappointed in you, Julian,” the corner of her mouth turned up into a lopsided grin as she spoke, looking straight into his dark eyes. She turned away a few seconds later, letting her words hang in the air.  “I hear that you have a bit of a pet in that faux-psychiatrist stalking about. Do tell me where I can find one of my own.”

Julian nodded continuously as she spoke, blinking slowly as she complimented him -- as if to show his appreciation. "Of course I am. I'm both. And you're a gorgeous, articulate young woman with whom I'd enjoy to spend more time. Especially if you're going to read any of my material. I could go for a critic. Tell me what you will. Honesty is the best and I'm sure you'll have nothing but nice things to say of my work." He beamed, folding his arms across his chest as he spread his legs into something of a wide v so that he could rest more comfortably. "A bit of a pet?" Julian liked Ember, enjoyed her, really, however he couldn't help but laugh at what Vivien referred to her as. "Well... they're a rare treat, really... I could teach you my ways but I'm not sure you deserve it, really." He winked playfully.

Smirking at him, Ember kept her tone lighthearted and smile on her face as she looked up at the man she adored and asked something she really did want to know. Oh? And what about me? Would you get jealous over me?

Julian thought for a moment, face screwed up in concentration before he looked back at her and very firmly shook his head 'no'. "I have no reason to get jealous about you. You're a loyal member of my team. Even if you wandered off... I venture to think all I'd have to do is whistle -- figuratively, of course -- and you'd come back."

That smile made the whole silly scene and all the effort worth while, especially since several of her best pieces of clothing and jewelry had gone to several sources to complete the getup. Most of it to that horrid stripper. Lowering down onto the pillow next to him, Ember poured herself a drink as well as she lounged next to him. “Charlie insisted they were the best berries she’d found so far. She said you deserved them, probably the only free thing I got.” Shaking her head she shifted to lean against his side slightly, enjoying the closeness. “This all seems pretty luxurious, don’t you agree? Besides; you, Mr. Callaghan, are man who should be bathed in luxury.” 

"Bartering to make me smile? Well, if that's not the sweetest most selfless act..." Julian joked, grinning at the girl next to him. He ate another couple of berries, looking down at the woman who had leaned against him. "I suppose... considering the circumstances. It's probably the closest thing to luxury any of us will ever get." He smiled and took a drink of the wine, closing his eyes to the sweetness of the taste. "I assume supplies like this must be running out... but wine could still be made."

She raised her eyebrow and leaned forward slightly as she attempted to read what exactly it was he had written next to her name. Failing, she turned her gaze back to him as he showed her around. “I can appreciate a quick wit, Mr. Callaghan, but flattery will get you everywhere,” she joked with a playful wink. “Do you still write? Not including the notes on the other campers - I think that would put me to sleep in seconds. Stories, poems? I lost a library when all of this happened, and, well, I think you might agree that the real world can be very, very boring.”

Julian smiled slightly as the girl tried to write what he'd written down for her. He tilted the paper up, toward his chest, so she couldn't see it though it didn't really matter. He hadn't put down anything of interest, just a summary of what she'd told him. Things he thought would be pertinent to their records. "That's how I operate as well, Miss Gray. Flattery is greatly appreaciated." He gave her a crinkly grin, tucking his record book under his arm before nodding at her question. "I write all the time... but I use the other campers as influence on what I write. They're all great characters but I definitely embellish and make it more... mm... colorful?" He cracked another brilliant grin. "The real world is very boring, even post apocalypse."

Who: Julian Callaghan & Becca James

Julian frowned slightly, almost imperceptibly, and sat down beside Becca, wishing he'd had time to change. But there would be time for that later. After whatever it was that she was going to tell him. He could feel the tension in the air, thick and stagnant. "Sure..." He wasn't so sure he wanted to hear it but he'd lend her an ear. He'd always be there for that.