Progress, not perfection

This man has eight of the same shirt and five of the same hoodie. This man memorizes hockey stats for fun. This man will have a cold ginger ale. This man will look awkwardly at the camera with a smile like he wants to incinerate himself in every wet t-shirt contest sports drink ad his mom books for him. This man will take everything you say absolutely literally. That’s French, Ilya. You just said a French word and we’re talking about Russian, are you unfamiliar with your own language. This man takes three days to recognize a social cue. And ten years to name an emotion. You’ll tell him you like him in the most roundabout way and you’ll think you NAILED it, and he’ll promptly have a panic attack on your dick. When he names that emotion finally? He’ll be absolutely relentless and will not stand down; he’s had an emotion and he knows you have one, too. By that point, there’s no escape. He’s imprinted on you and is starting to ovulate in your vicinity. He will bludgeon you with adorable nerd and insatiable ass. And his oral fixation is so mighty he’ll suck your remaining brain cells out through your dick.

I DONT EVEN HAVE WORDS ANYMORE.

-shane chirping the other russian players in the league because he’s nearly fluent now (ilya heart eyes in the background)

-shane goal drought and ilya snapping at reporters asking him if shane would benefit from being healthy scratched for a game

-stupidly overpassing the puck on the powerplay but they just keep passing it back and forth to each other and ignoring everyone else (the crowd yelling SHOOOOOT at them)

-arguing with the refs nonstop, both of them. everyone is so tired of them

episode one, in the dark

episode six, in the light

The proof? Ilya.

He's gentle and respectful of consent and boundaries, he never made shane feel uncomfortable for how he folds clothes before hooking up even though he did find it amusing, or how shane felt uncomfortable with so many windows even tho they were on one of the higher floors, mind you that at that point their feelings for each other weren't nearly as intense as its been later.

But he's also funny and made shane laugh alot even when he was uptight and nervous, ragebaity on the ice yes (he's still a hockey player after all) but he's a good captain and knows how to uplift his team whether its with jokes or speeches that made ME want to win their game lmao, he's always there for other people's important moment ie after scott came out and his speech at the awards (when he met scott at the bar, in the books).

Its so obvious how caring he is at the hospital scene too, he went to check on shane while also mentioning how marleau feels bad for what happened and wanted shane to know that. In episode six, reassuring shane when his dad found them, told shane he'd of course go with him to his family with zero hesitation, was there for shane as just a quiet support until shane really needed him while panicking and ilya immediately jumped in to reassure him.

But, he also cared for his father who was absolutely terrible to him and his mother, whom he FOUND when she committed (thats an entire trauma of its own). He spent his summers in russia taking care of his father, when he was away he was sending an absurd amount of money over, made sure they eat the best of food and wear the best of clothes in the hopes that it would be good enough but it wasn't and yet, and YET he still took care of them. Even after his father died and his brother being an ass, he's leaving money for his niece because none of this is her fault. It also broke me how emotional he got when shane talked about the foundations he wants to donate too and his plan like, after all this time taking care of others he got shane (and the hollanders) taking care of him and making future plans with him in mind and it got to him.

But he's also polite and respectful, he smiled at the nurse and said thank you, apologized to the bartender for his team being idiots, in episode six he's respectful of shane's family and dug into the food happily and said thank you for it later and also complimented the vodka they brought out. He played with the children at the all star weekend so beautifully and made them laugh and for god's sake! He likes to spread joy.

So yeah i do believe that she was beautiful and funny because, even though it was for only twelve years, she raised him! and he is exactly the way he describes her. Strong and beautiful and funny despite the circumstances.

He's proof that being kind is a choice you actively make every single day, that even with a shit upbringing or circumstances you can still be a good person because you choose to be. But also even though his mom left the battle at the end, she still powered through just like he is. Except he has Shane to be there for him while he fights his fight.