i know it's wrong to be envious of someone, but I'm really jealous of people who were able to live a normal adolescence or at least a nice adolescence with friends, without hospitalizations, without being like a zombie because of the meds, and not having been able to enjoy what so many people miss about being a teen. i would like to have something to miss.

the jealousy fucking drives you crazy

No one will ever love me as much as I love them, and it hurts more than anything in the world.

i crave being someone’s first choice so bad. why does no one ever choose me over others?

Where do i go if nowhere and no-one feels like home anymore

they will replace me so easily and never remember who i even was

you have so much fun without me. my presence doesnt make a difference to you. i can walk away and you will still have fun. i can be there and it wouldnt really matter. you love me, but youre so constantly surrounded by people that you love that it doesnt matter whether or not im around. and i love that for you, i guess. live on without me. dont make my presence make a difference in your life. dont beg me to stay.