DarkenFreaky

My birthday is in a few days. Wyatt, Willow, and our daughter Lyra are planning a party to show off our new place and introduce our friends to our favorite little dive bar.

At this point, most of our friends are lifestyle, lifestyle connected, or in the know. With one huge exception. My cousin. We’ll call her Diana. We’re as close as sisters despite being 3 hours apart. It’s been hard to not share such an important part of my life with her. Wyatt, Sirius, Willow and I have had a lot of conversations about being out with family. We all feel that we don’t need anyone’s approval, but at the end of the day, not having Diana in my life would be devastating. Not that I thought that would happen…,but conversations are hard.

Anyway…Lyra suggested strongly. That I talk with Diana prior to the party. In her words “mom, one look at you and Sirius together and anyone would know something is up”. So I called her. Wyatt was sitting next to me.

“Hey so before next week I probably need to tell you about a couple of people you’re going to meet”.

*pause* “ok”

And I took a breath and launched into how we fell in love with Willow and Sirius and have been seeing them for over two years

*pause* “so it’s like you’re bringing your couple home to meet the fam?”

Lots more conversation and laughs and Diana can’t wait to meet them.

I’m a big proponent of kitchen table polyamory. We love to sit at dinner with our friends and their friends and everyone gets along. 

We’ve tried several combinations of friends and usually have had a wonderful time. 

Unfortunately, friends of ours have revealed that they aren’t coming to dinners anymore when certain friends of Willow and Sirius are going to be there.

I can understand their feelings. Especially after the alcohol starts flowing and people get slightly less polite. Not everyone is always going to get along. There has never been an open argument, but certainly some uncomfortable silences.

It does make it complicated to schedule dinners though. Do we alternate inviting our friends and next time invite Willow’s friends? Do we need a change of venue? A restaurant instead of our house? How do we decide which events to invite each couple? Do we invite an even bigger group so the feuding friends can stay far apart?