behind blue eyes.

you're unhappy with the life you're living right now, so you're always looking ahead or behind of you. the past seems so much sweeter after years of nostalgia has eroded your brain. YOU LONG FOR IT BACK, EVEN IF IT WAS FULL OF AWFUL EXPERIENCES, because you feel like anything is better than this. and to you, the future is something you hold onto with great desperation. IT'S WHAT DRIVES YOU TO GET UP AND GET THROUGH THE DAY. BUT YOU'VE DONE THIS FOR SO LONG, AND NOW YOU'VE SETTLED INTO A PATTERN. you wake up and already wish for another day. then, when the day is over, you wish for it back. there's nothing inherently wrong with looking towards the future or reflecting on the past. however, it's now preventing you from even seeing the point in existing today. LET YOURSELF LIVE AND EXPERIENCE THINGS FIRSTHAND. let go of those memories and desires, even if it's just for a small minute or two. with time, you might start to see the beauty in the present. don't you want to live in the moment for a change? wouldn't it be nice to feel like you have enough where you are, right now?

mutuals  /  partners are welcome to reblog!

mutuals  /  partners are welcome to reblog!

it's not just the way they're at rest. it's that they're at rest with you. it's not just that they're safe but that they feel safe enough to let you see them like this. IT'S TRUST AND IT'S INTIMACY. AND YOU'RE NOT SURE YOU'RE READY FOR THEM TO SEE THE EMOTIONS IN YOUR EYES RIGHT NOW. they've been through enough. you both have. SOMETIMES IT SCARES YOU JUST HOW MUCH YOU LOVE THEM. IT TERRIFIES YOU THAT YOU FEEL HAPPY AS THEY LAY THERE, eyes closed and hair a little messy. their features twitch and you know they're dreaming and it scares you because if you fall asleep too you won't have a nightmare tonight. you'll dream of them. or nothing at all. and either way it will make you need them more. and YOU'RE NOT SUPPOSED TO NEED ANYONE BUT IT'S THEM. YOU WANT TO HOLD THEM IN YOUR ARMS AND NEVER LET GO. YOU WANT TO PROTECT THEM BUT YOU KNOW THEY WANT TO PROTECT YOU TO. THIS IS THE KIND OF LOVE YOU LONG FOR AND IT'S THE KIND WHICH WILL HURT IF YOU LOSE IT. but here you are anyway. it's too late now. you're glad it's too late to go back.

YOU HAVE TRIED TO BE ATLAS FOR FAR TOO LONG. your legs tremble and shoulders creak beneath the weight of the world you carry. every step forward is a battle, yet you soldier on... for what? WHEN WILL YOU LEARN THAT YOU ARE ALLOWED TO LOWER YOUR HEAVY BURDENS?