CAGED.

    ❛   you   don’t   have   to   go   so   far   as   to   wish   to   save   me ,   miss   hoapili .   ❜     it’s   no   use .   who   prays   for   the   devil’s   salvation ?   certainly ,   not   anyone   with   a   brain .   but   maybe ,   somebody   with   a   heart .   the   heart   of  somebody   that   cares ,   &   stars,   i   beg   she   didn’t .   there’s   no   use   for   any   of  it .   the   heart   is   too   soft ,   too   sentimental …   &   a   dash   too   vulnerable .

    this   sounds   hypocritical   when  it’s   coming   from   you ,   &   that’s   why   you   don’t   say   anything .   after   all ,   what   comes   out   of   a   soul   so   beaten   to   the   ground   other  than   a   scream ?   you   don’t   ( have   an )   answer . 

     ❛   you’re   free   to   leave .   i   have   never   intended   to  keep  you   so  distracted   from   your   pursuits ,   nor   do   i   do  now .  go .   ❜     &   i’m   so   sorry .   all   i   wanted   is   to   set   you   free .   the   voice  –  heavy   &   hard  –  doesn’t   dare   falter ,   but   accompanying   eyes ,   blue ,   the   color   of   melancholy ,   soften .   love   is   not   supposed   to   be   a   gilded   cage ,   &  yet  here  you  are ,  one’s   little  measly   canary ,  yearning   to   scream   what   you   could   not  dare   whisper .   i   don’t   deserve   anything   of   you ,   i   deserve   to   be  alone ;   i’m   a   monster .

* @daintblue hey :(((((

     “ why are you so determined to convince me that you aren’t worth saving ? ”     it’s what you always wanted, to save others. st. mungos would have been absolutely bonkers to reject your application ! && when it came to who you loved, oh, you would have given everything to save them from the BAD THINGS, even if it meant putting your own self at risk; pearl slept in your bedroom so much that it was a miracle you were never caught. && when you can’t save someone, it crushes you in the worst way possible, doesn’t it ? you refuse to entertain a world where you cannot save everyone, especially when you love them so dearly...&& yet you’ve failed. 

                    they trusted you, && you failed them. how could you do that? how could you? HOW?

     you love pearl, you do, so much that it aches to see what she’s become. but now she’s going down a path that you can no longer follow her on, && your heart screams to stay, but your brain knows better. everything that you stand for may crumble to dust if you choose to turn your cheek. are you really willing to sacrifice your goodness to bring back pearl’s ? curse her for becoming this thing that you can’t recognize anymore ! curse the creature that is wearing her skin, && curse her for breaking your heart, && curse her for telling you to go when all you want is to stay stay stay ! && the worst part of it all ? you know deep down that this may be the last time you ever speak to her, and dammit, that hurts you the most.

DEAR EVAN HANSEN SENTENCE STARTERS - NOT ACCEPTING

               IT’S LIKE A SLAP TO THE FACE! everything you have been through together, it all crumbles into dust right before your eyes, scatters upon the breeze with the memories you always cherished the most. era 1 had been so…peaceful, like a dream. it was so much easier to not realize you were trapped in chains because at least you were surrounded by ones that you loved dearly. and even when enlightenment arrived, when the war was raging, when your dear friend was risking her life for freedom, it had just been assumed that you would all join her on earth when the time was right. you had always assumed that she would come back for you, all of you, and whisk you away to a life free from chains. but she never did. she never came back, and it was easier to swallow when you thought she was dead, but here she is, neither cracked nor shattered nor corrupted, perfectly healthy at least on the outside. and stars above, it hurts, it hurts so bad to know that she was alive this whole time and she did nothing. surely there must have been something, anything, that could have reached homeworld? anything that could have saved them from the terrible fates they were met with?               “YOU SAID YOU WERE GOING TO COME BACK.”     lips laced with poison, you spit the venom like a serpent that is starved and desperate, desperate for something to sink its teeth into, desperate for something to blame. a scapegoat! a distraction! it hurts far less to blame someone else for what happened to you than it is to blame yourself – but you know you will never stop punishing yourself for the past. but thousands of years of it has worn you out, it’s sucked you dry, and you just want to be angry, because don’t you deserve that? don’t you deserve to feel angry and abandoned and lonely even when you’re surrounded by gems every day? don’t you deserve to let it out? does your beautiful renegade deserve your venom when it was never her fault to begin with?     “the only things you’ve given me are pain and years of my life wasted on your memory. i grieved for you every day, i wondered what i could have done differently, i wondered what i could have done to save you, and after all these years, you’ve been alive this whole time? i’m not a fool to believe that there was nothing on earth that could have contacted homeworld. and i’m not a fool to not realize when i am unwanted. i truly hope your quartz was worth it.”

DEAR EVAN HANSEN SENTENCE STARTERS - NOT ACCEPTING

               “NO…NO, YELLOW, IT WAS NEVER LIKE THAT!”     is this all you are good for now? are you only good for hurting people and putting them in danger? making them feel like you used them to make yourself feel better? your heart is too big for your body, it doesn’t fit inside the ribcage of light the way it is meant to, and because of that, it’s far more vulnerable. you have been hurt so many times that you have to protect it, you must keep it locked away so it can’t be broken again, but what happens when it starts to beat passionately for someone and you can’t let them in the way you want to? what happens when you make a mistake and they feel abandoned when they needed you the most? what will you do then, little songbird?               “IT WAS NEVER LIKE THAT, YOU...YOU ARE ENOUGH.”     you grasp at her hands and squeeze them tight, like an anchor; it is up for debate on who is the one being anchored. your eyes are pleading for her to believe you, that she is not a replacement for someone you lost, she is not a copy of your past. she is different, she’s her own gem. stop letting the past control your life.     “you are enough, and not because i say so, because you just are. you have always been enough for me. you always will. please...please don’t ever doubt that.”

What are your muse’s aesthetics? BOLD any which apply to your muse! Remember to REPOST! Feel free to add to the list!

[ COLOURS ]  ~  burgundy. red. crimson. scarlet. maroon. mahogany. copper. amber. chocolate. brown. tawny. tan. bronze. brass. orange. gold. saffron. yellow. chartreuse. spring green. lime. mint. green. olive. forest. turquoise. teal. cerulean. blue. navy. cobalt. periwinkle. indigo. pewter. plum. purple. magenta. fuchsia. lilac. lavender. pink. coral. peach. ivory. cream. white. silver. grey. smoke. charcoal. ebony. black. pastels. vibrant. matte. metallic. muted. dark. light.

[ BODY ] ~ mutations. claws. fangs. wings. tails. feathers. webs. spikes. scales. fur. stripes. spots. freckles. acne. bruises. scars. scratches. gashes. lashes. wounds. amputations. burns. brands. teeth. gums. tongues. lips. beards. mustaches. cheeks. noses. ears. eyes. eyelashes. eyebrows. hair. heads. neck. shoulders. collarbones. arms. elbows. wrists. hands. fingers. breast. back. ribs. abs. belly. hips. curves. butts. legs. thighs. knees. shins. ankles. feet. toes. nails. sweat. spit. tears. blood. heart. stomach. lungs. liver. veins. guts. bones. spine. muscle. skin. feline. canine. masculine. feminine.

[ WEAPONS ]  ~  bites. fists. sword. dagger. spear. arrow. bow. crossbow. hammer. shield. poison. guns. axes. throwing axes. whips. knives. throwing knives. pepper sprays. tasers. machine guns. slingshots. katanas. maces. staffs. wands. powers. magical items. magic. rocks. mud balls. bombs. missiles. boomerangs. lethal pets. lasers.

[ MATERIALS ]  ~ metal. gold. silver. platinum. pewter. titanium. iron. steel. copper. bronze. brass. tin. bismuth. diamonds. pearls. rubies. garnets. sapphires. emeralds. jade. peridots. alexandrite. opal. topaz. jasper. quartz. rose quartz. smoky quartz. amethyst. citrine. fluorite. amber. malachite. turquoise. lapis lazuli. sodalite. pyrite. labradorite. moonstone. petrified wood. wood. paper. parchment. hemp. canvas. burlap. oils skin. muslin. rayon. faux. wool. fur. lace. leather. skins. suede. corduroy. silk. satin. chiffon. velvet. denim. linen. cotton. charcoal. clay. stone. rocks. flint. asphalt. brick. granite. marble. dust. rust. glitter. sand. dirt. mud. smoke. ash. carbonate. rubber. synthetics. nylon. polyester. plastic. glass. porcelain. bone. shells. coral.

[ NATURE ]  ~ grass. leaves. trees. bark. flowers. roses. daisies. forget me nots. tulips. lavender. petals. thorns. seeds. hay. roots. ocean. pond. river. stream. waterfall. creek. meadow. forest. desert. tundra. savanna. rain forest. tropical. jungle. marsh. moors. swamp. plains. hills. highlands. caves. underwater. coral reef. beach. waves. space. clouds. mountains. fire. lava. ice. frost. water. air. earth. rain. snow. wind. moon. stars. sun. heat. cold. steam. lightning. sunlight. moonlight. dawn. dusk. twilight. midnight. sunrise. sunset. dewdrops. shadow. tornado. hurricane. water spout. thunder. hail. twisters. humidity. dryness.

[ ANIMALS ] ~ birds. penguins. eagles. owls. falcons. vultures. hawks. swans. parrots. parakeets. doves. pigeons. ducks. robins. cardinals. blue jays. bluebirds. blackbirds. crows. ravens. magpies. mockingbirds. flamingos. ostriches. seagulls. albatross. peacocks. condors. finches. pelicans. chickens. geese. quail. bats. sheep. cows. buffalo. deer. hedgehogs. elephants. horses. giraffes. cats. lions. tigers. pumas. cheetahs. jaguars. foxes. dogs. wolves. coyotes. bunnies. mice. rats. monkeys. apes. bears. pandas. polar bears. snakes. iguanas. chameleons. alligators. crocodiles. turtles. lizards. frogs. toads. whales. dolphins. fish. sharks. stingrays. octopus. lobsters. crabs. bugs. spiders. ants. moths. butterflies. flies. maggots. roaches. ladybugs. beetles. cicadas. dragonflies. fleas. termites. leeches. worms.snails. mosquitoes. werewolves. unicorns. pegasus. dragons. dinosaurs.

[ FOODS/DRINKS ]  ~  pepper. salt. sugar. honey. syrup. caramel. candy. bubblegum. mints. candy canes. gumdrops. lollipops. chocolate. vanilla. cinnamon. ice cream. cake. cookies. brownies. biscuits. pie. tarts. lemonade. soda. champagne. wine. brandy. rum. whiskey. vodka. tequila. sake. beer. soju. gin. crema de cacao. cocoa. latte. coffee. tea. spices. herbs. fruit. apples. oranges. lemons. cherries. strawberries. blueberries. raspberries. cranberries. watermelons. cantaloupes. bananas. coconuts. grapes. kiwi. pomegranates. tomatoes. vegetables. potatoes. cucumbers. carrots. turnips. onions. leeks. celery. broccoli. cabbages. lettuces. roots. nuts. white meat. red meat. raw meat. veal. pork. chicken. beef. venison. fish. lobster. oysters. pizza. ambrosia. pasta. sandwiches. soup.

[ HOBBIES ]  ~  music. piano. flute. woodwinds. whistles. drums. guitar. cello. synthesizer. violin. lute. harp. fiddle. harmonica. trumpet. brass. singing. composing. folk. classical. bluegrass. blues. jazz. big band. pop. country. rock. punk. metal. electronica. hip hop. reggae. ska. rap. vinyl records. cassettes. cds. soundcloud. itunes. spotify. art. sculpting. pottery. painting. watercolour. drawing. pastels. charcoal. sketching. graffiti. printing. inking. collecting. fighting. martial arts. self-defence. boxing. fencing. sumo. wrestling. jousting. paintball. lazer tag. duelling. hunting. fishing. climbing. weight lifting. training. sports. football. football (usa). rugby. baseball. cricket. lacrosse. volleyball. basketball. tennis. badminton. skating. cycling. sailing. rowing. hiking. running. gymnastics. dancing. ice skating. hockey. reading. writing. cooking. sewing. acting. photography. video games. horseback riding. gardening. smithing. shopping. traveling. movies. theatre. libraries. books. magazines. playing cards. poker chips. chess. dice. science.

[ STYLE ]  ~ nudism. perfume. cologne. piercings. tattoos. henna. body paint. war paint. make up. lipstick. mascara. eyeliner. eye shadow. powder. beauty marks. blush. nail polish. lingerie. fishnet. pantie-hoes. socks. stockings. leggings. long johns. under armor. corsets. sports bras. bustles. camisoles. blouses. button ups. tunics. vests. waistcoats. leather jackets. ponchos. sweaters/jumpers. hoodies. skirts. jeans. kilts. breeches. scarfs. cravats. ascots. belts. sashes. gloves. heels. sandals. platforms. tennis shoes. penny loafers. jordans. slippers. boots. cowboy boots. rain boots. army boots. armor. justaucorps. trench coats. capes. cloaks. burqa. suits. tuxedos. kimonos. saris. sundresses. gowns. jewelry. earrings. noes rings. lip rings. tongue piercings. belly rings. gauges. eyebrow rings.necklaces. pearl strings. leis. bracelets. bangles. cuffs. watches. friendship bracelets. rings. pendants. lockets. broaches. boutonnieres. pocket watches. cufflinks. hats. crowns. circlets. flower crowns. helmets. hijabs. turbans. baseball caps. cowboy hats. brocade. doublet. gorget. bracers. masks. cowls. braces. glasses. sun glasses. eye contacts. pyjamas.