d̶e̶v̶i̶l̶s̶ ̶s̶p̶a̶w̶n̶ ̶.̶ ̶

i asked the nurse to give you this book so you could finish it.

that was the dumbest remark i ever heard anyone make.

he was pretty torn up that night.

you still have a lot o f time to make yourself be what you want.

i wish i could say that everything went back to normal, but it didn't.

my parents are dead.

i don't know, he just died.

i've had about all i can take from you guys.

you get back into your car or you'll get split.

how was work?

where have you been?

you don't quit!

that was really funny. i don't mean funny. you know what i mean.

i really did try in school, but you saw my grades.

don't you even remember being in the hospital?

i wished i could beat it out of there.

i guess this just about puts me out of every race.

i don't know what i expected the whole thing to be like.

you'd like that, wouldn't you?

the hearing wasn't anything like i thought it would be.

don't touch me.

what was he like?

if we don't have each other, we don't have anything.

i knew i was flunking out in that class, but golly, i couldn't help it.

he'll probably think you're crazy, but ask for me.

he was dead before he hit the ground, but i knew that was what he wanted.

you know a guy a long time, and i mean really know him, you don't get used to the idea that he's dead just overnight.

would he have listened? i doubted it.

some of their parents came by to thank me and i know it was worth it.

wanna smoke?

you're living in a vacuum, and you're going to have to cut it out.

there's still lots of good in the world.

sometimes i just have to get out

i told you you were in no condition for a rumble.

there's a guy here to see you. says he knows you.

a guy that'll really listen to you, listen and care about what you're saying, is something rare.

i thought he was going to go to sleep shaving this morning and cut his throat.

you're not going to drop out.

he isn't dead.

i don't know, baby. i just don't know.

you'd never be happy doing something like that.

dad's a good guy and everything, better than most, and i kind of let him down, being mixed up in all this.

i'm telling you the truth.

you wouldn't eat anything most of the time you were sick.

people i knew wouldn't talk to me, and people i didn't know would come right up and ask about the whole mess.

i'm not crying.

i dropped out because i'm dumb.

i'm okay. just a little hungry.

anytime you don't like the way i'm running things, you can get out.

it's like i'm the middleman in a tug o' war and i'm being split in half.

it was the oddest feeling in the world, i didn't feel anything.

did they hate us now?

where'd i get a concussion?

i guess we all just wanted to stay together.

you don't just stop living because you lose someone.

gosh, kid, you had us scared to death.

we're all we've got left. we ought to be able to stick together against everything.

i've never seen him so mad.

where did you think you were going?

i'm just going to miss you guys.

i had to push him to bed, but he was out like a light in a second.

it's not that easy, is it?

how'd you like some mushroom soup?

i guess your folks feel kind of awful about it, too.

what was the matter with me?

when you're a kid everything's new.

why didn't he tell you? i thought he told you everything.

i thought you knew that by now.

i wished they'd let me have a cigarette.

i'll have to get a job as soon as i get out of school anyway.

today's tuesday, and you've been asleep and delirious since saturday night. don't you remember?

i'd rather have anybody's hate than their pity.

what all did i say while i was delirious?

you really would have used that bottle, wouldn't you?

it's just.. i can't stand to hear y'all fight.

come on, let's go after him.

hey, i didn't know you didn't like baloney.

hate to tell you this, kiddo, but you're bleedin' all over my car seats.

gosh, mister, i'm sorry.

are you all right, kid? you look like you've been in a fight.

i'm not the kind that can lie around looking at the ceiling all the time.

put out that cigarette!

where's the party?

don't you start crying, too.

go back to sleep now.

what was he talking about?

you look beat.

easy, buddy, easy.

if you make me stay in bed there ain't anywhere else i can smoke.

will ya, honey? go back to sleep.

now please shut up,

he's gonna blow up, he couldn't take it.

i don't like it. i never liked it.

we don't like nobody killing our friends.

you'd have really cut them up, huh?

yesterday was years ago. a lifetime ago.

i don't remember.

have a seat if you can find one.

i ain't going to go to sleep smoking.

you're gold when you're a kid.

we're not going to fight anymore.

you couldn't make it to the door through that mess.

i don't want to sit down.

he was good-looking even then

his old man was rich, he could pay whatever fine there was for being drunk and picking a fight.

their lives are worth more than mine, they have more to live for.

if you got tough you didn't get hurt.

i can't take sides. it'd be a lot easier if i could, but i see both sides.

listen, with your brains and grades you could get a scholarship, and we could put you through college.

that's what i'm wishing was all that's bothering me.

please don't fight anymore.

listen, i don't mind dying now.

what's your address? i'm not about to dump a hurt kid out on the streets this time of night.

i'm cold. how about going home?

i want your own ideas and your own experiences.

he died violent and young and desperate, just like we all knew he'd die someday.

listen to me, you didn't do anything.

how long have i been asleep?

he's kind of upset about all this.

don't worry about it. this wreck's been through worse.

i think he could have whipped anyone, in the state he was in.

it's going to be a long time before i can even think about my parents.

hey, did the mail come in yet?

i bet you ain't had three hours sleep since saturday night.

i don't think he's ever really seen a sunset.

there's nothing we can do now.

i think you'd better go now.

he ran out like the devil was after him.

you can just lay off!

keep that way, it's a good way to be.

you're not going to die if you don't get a smoke, but if that bed catches on fire you will.

i had to stay in bed a whole week after that.

don't get tough. you're not like the rest of us and don't try to be.

what in the world are you doing?

t's the first time i've felt anything in a long time.

nobody ever looks a whole lot like his picture in a yearbook anyway.

he cried every night that week you were gone.

you got a concussion from getting kicked in the head.

two friends of mine had died that night

it's bad enough having to listen to it, but when you start trying to get me to take sides..

something wrong?

look, i'm happy working in a gas station with cars.

it's worth saving those kids.

i'm not ever going to be able to make up the school i've missed.

he feels things differently than you do.

you blasted fool. they don't know you're only bluffing.

dialogue prompts from hot milk by deborah levy.

if my laptop is broken, so am i.

will you still be here in a month?

they used to film spaghetti westerns here.

i don't have an occupation, so much as i have a preoccupation.

i'm starting to think you want to keep me here.

i want a bigger life.

some things are getting bigger, but not the right things.

may i refer to you as _____?

identity is always difficult to guarantee.

memory is not always reliable.

jesus called his mother 'woman'.

i don't know why i'm so frightened.

i failed my test four times.

can you ride a horse?

i didn't mean to frighten you.

it's not your fault. i was frightened, anyway.

when i look in the mirror, i do not recognize myself.

you are always so far away.

you smell like the ocean. like a starfish.

i picked these flowers for you.

i want to mess up the story i've been told about myself.

my whole life has been about endurance.

my first enemy and adversary is endurance.

let's take twenty minutes for a coffee and a pastry.

where have you got to by trying to please everyone all the time?

it seems like i am always freaking you out.

does that feel nice?

shall i lie with you for a while?

if you want me to go away, why don't you say so?

i need to be bolder.

everyone is a field study to you.

you are getting bolder.

do i look like i am thriving?

i feel completely safe in your hands.

i will have to be your eyes.

have you ever said what you've meant in your life?

i am wounded with desire, and i am ready for the ordeal of love.

one is not born, but rather becomes, a chameleon.

guilt is very disabling.

i have no grip on time anymore.

my own sexuality is an enigma even to me.

i'm not sure what it is that you want for me.

my life isn't enviable. even i don't want it.

i suppose i am boring you. i am bored, too.

i am not okay, not at all, and haven't been for some time.

i'm not sure what the rules are anymore.

i am panging for artisan coffee.

are you anticapitalist?

all greek myths are about unhappy families.

i am freer than i've ever been.

you were only a child.

you look like a popstar.

all you need is a guitar and a band.

you are obsessed with me.

your boundaries are made from sand.

i do know how to keep a secret.

it's unfortunate. you are always here when i am here.

something about you touches me very deeply.

you're my _____. your pains are my pains.

i often fear the future has already happened.

i'm not sure what kind of reality i'm living in right now.

sleep is for happier people.

i'm afraid to sleep.

why are you dead, when you are alive?

we have to mourn our dead, but we cannot let them take over our life.

Flowers in the Attic (1987)

all that i can say, all that i can know is that i'll be dreaming pieces of you.

what am i to do?

all my little troubles haven't got a prayer.

heaven's all around you when you haven't got a care.

how they end depend on how you play your part.

fortunately, how you played your part has got you here.

use discretion. stay alert.

welcome to eternity. now eat your just desserts.

you haven't slept in many suns and moons.

i will sleep when we reach shore.

there's the bad. lanterns down.

i don't want to go to sleep. in all my dreams, i drown.

scold me, hold me. i'll be yours to keep.

the only thing i beg of you, don't make me go to sleep.

as you'll note, the rules are clearly stated.

there are consequences, morbid consequences, crueler than ever imagined.

oh, yes, there are consequences, bloody consequences, when you don't follow the rules.

reckless creatures, always one another find.

we're like moths to the flame.

now, tarry no longer.

let's burn one another.

now, let's play a game.

hello, beautiful stranger.

how familiar the danger.

shadow takes all, my pet.

i could say that i'm hurt, but it wouldn't be true.

the knife in my back — it reminds me of you.

let me tell you a tale for a penny.

it doesn't end well. no, it never ends well.

would it not be a sin for you to deny yourselves a tale?

that greed, it'll kill you.

these are difficult times, yes, difficult times.

never tasted as sweet a poison as you have.

you're an urge that can never be cured.

you're a bad little love and i'm yours.

trust me, darling dear.

trust me, honey, do, just like i trust you.

babe, you're a hard game to catch.

you fight and refuse, oh, you're a wild little bruise.

you know you never can hide.

you're a bad little love and you're mine.

how many kisses do you need?

black is love's potion. we drink from its well.

let's drink to true love.

let me tell you a tale of a love that did fail.

how quickly we forget the sting, my love.

what a pretty yet dangerous line, my love.

what bitter yet delicious wine, my love.

remember that you were warned.

come drink a cup of my scorn.

let me open my teeth and cradle you there.

a sheep has left the fold.

we've got grace for sale.

how the worm is turning.

each of them is tested, blessed.

cast out for your sin? come here for redemption.

we've got grace for cheap, lest you end up bested, lost and torn to shreds, dissected.