Why

I want you to text me

So sometimes I wonder, if I want to be with anyone. Then I find someone who makes me really happy, and I'm excited. Then I start thinking about romantic stuff.

And I think about kisses-no thanks.

Or hugs-no thanks my stomach's in the way

Hand holding-yeah my hands get clammy so I'd really rather not

Cuddling-sure (with in reason) but really I'd rather not

I start to wonder, have I just been making excuses? Am I really just afraid to open my heart to someone?

She looked at him like he was the Sun, of her world.

So I finally realized why I can't be with anyone else. Why I don't see anyone else as a potential partner. Why I don't like anyone else. Why I don't try with anyone else.

Despite everything, you still feel like home. I could completely despise you in every way, and you still feel like home. I could be yelling at you, or chastising you or ignoring you( at least trying to) and you still feel like home.

I know I forgot for a while, what it felt like to really like someone, or be interested in someone. It's because I'm still attached to you.

When I was little, in the summer times my grandmother would force me and my brother to read for 30 minutes each day. My brother didn't like it that much, but I adored it because I'm a big reading nerd.

Some days I'd read in my room escaping to another world. Sometimes I'd get too comfy in my soft sheets, the delicious smell of an old book would fill me up too much, and the sun would shine in my bedroom too softly, and I'd find my self sleeping. It was the softest, calmest, most treasurous moment of my childhood.

me: so glad I'm not on my period

second week-

me: another free week without blood... haha

third week-

me: better start preparing for the flood?

fourth week-

me: alright you little sneaker, I bet you're trying to sneak up on me

litterally the last day of the month-

period: *arrives*