A Mess

Was talking with my therapist about how I get myself some sense of achievement in everyday life, and I told her that I occasionally give myself little secret self-appointed tasks, where the only goal is to manage to achieve some completely random, pointless, arbitrary goal without anyone else finding out or asking me about the whatever weird shit I am currently in the middle of doing. There's no punishment for failing to do so, I don't dread any kind of an outcome, nor is there any other reward for succeeding the task, than managing to succeed in it - a little challenge with no other goal or purpose than being a little challenge.

“revolutionary skyscraper”

i’m so ticked off with london actually. they have a building nicknamed the CHEESEGRATER for obvious reasons, another named the SHARD OF GLASS bc it’s fucking pointy

I was thinking about all the stories of exploited workers explaining that they can’t leave work even if they’re sick, prompted by coronavirus concerns & I was thinking about when I was a *part time* librarian at a community college and was made responsible for making ALL college IDs for students and staff and how once I called in sick for 2 days (unpaid because no benefits but I took the pay cut to stay home) and when I got back I had panicked emails from my boss who had gotten panicked emails from their boss who had gotten a swarm of panicked calls from people who hadn’t received IDs cause no one took any photos or processed or printed them for a week (cause I was only scheduled like 3 days a week to begin with) & therefore people couldn’t register for classes or in some cases even get in the building, and an emergency meeting was called where I had to explain how I got so far behind. Because they had no one else who knew how to perform this vital function to the college except a part time, unbenefitted person working in the campus library, and just relied on the assumption that I would never call in.