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Rejection! Many people fear this aspect of life however, curiously enough it is without a shadow of a doubt one of the most consistent ones. I am sure we do not have to dig too deep into our memory artillery to pick out the most hurtful memories, whether from our childhood, our first love, a funding bid or that job you really wanted. The memories are boundless and ample, yet many of us have not quite mastered how to bounce back quick. I myself have often allowed myself to be knocked down and have stayed down for long without knowing how to get and keep it moving. After years of trail and error the below is what has certainly helped me and I have found it works for me in many areas of my life, like my career, dating and finances.

Don’t take it personal, I am sure you have heard everyone from your family to your friends telling not to take something personally, heck you have probably been the voice of reason to someone’s madness by telling them ‘not to take it personal’. But how do you achieve this? Keep your options opened! I know you really wanted that Summer internship at KPMG , but since life is as predictable as British weather its wise to have your eggs in more than one basket. I also found that this also keeps you preoccupied and you will be far too busy to be hurt by rejection from one party when you have more than one option.

Do not for whatever reason attach who you are to what you achieve, this is a dark and dingy road seldomly travelled by those who overcome rejection. Apply logic and be kind to yourself after some introspection its best to think logically and not emotionally, about why something didn’t work out the way you wanted it to. Remember you are still a whole human being no matter the outcome. If however, you find yourself start down the path of self deprecating thoughts, I would encourage to write this out and right next to them write down a logical reason why this isn’t true. Say for instance you start thinking something along the lines of ‘I always fail’ simply think of and note done times which you considered yourself a success. I find this tactic leaves me feeling more confident , like  I can take over my world. You will need to be confident in your abilities, in your belief that something better will come your direction or that when it is your time you will receive your ‘YES’. So what you that guy from last week hasn’t texted you back, erm does he know what he is missing?

Ultimately what always centres me when I totally feel down is a simply saying which I will repeat to myself numerous times ‘Everything will be okay in the end If it’s not okay then its not the end’. This encourages me, inspires to standup , fight one more time. My favorite person to look at is Rihanna, the multi-millionaire singer, actress, designer and businesswoman. From the outside seemingly has had a charmed career but, what many people are not aware of is that she almost got dropped from her first record deal, but through sheer determination and self belief she funded her video for her first number 1 single S.O.S, this is arguably the single that catapulted her and helped solidify her career in music.

By Phophi Khandela

It’s Monday!

The old saying ‘Those who fail to plan, plan to fail’ rings true and familiar at this stage in my life. I have found it throughly effective to write down my daily goals in my day planner and tackle them  inch by inch.

Often at the end of the day I can celebrate my small victories and feel accomplished. These small victories inspire me to chase more smaller victories, which build up to big victories.

If you like me have the attention span of a gold fish and get easily distracted, I would encourage you to invest in one of these. Only cost me £2.50 from my local Wilkos. If you are on an extremely tight budget a plain paper and pen will do.

Wishing you all a week filled with your own small victories.

By Phophi Khandela