crazyshitjacksays

The Creepvine Zone, to the Creepvine Zone, everybody get to the Creepvine Zone, where everybody is respected, and everything is expected to be awesome. That's what happens in the Creepvine Zone.

I remembered my high score this time because that was the year my grandfather defeated that polar bear out in the west Andies, and not the Andes Mountains, the west Andies, the two Andies who lived over on the west side of town. They had a polar bear in their backyard, um, crazy time. Um, I mean, they didn't live anywhere near polar bears, so that was a little weird. India, that's where they lived. Um, we used to call it Andia, because the Andies lived in India. Weird time, but my family are quirky like that. We have the nickname "The LolRandoms" in our town.

It's back to Song of People, Song of  People. This is Song of People, People. Eggsy's got glasses and a hat now cause he looks like Heisenberg, but he don't sell meth. He just sells good vibes. Come to my store, it is called Bershka. You will get a good time with your auntie. I heard that she's a good lady, but maybe from wrong person cause I heard it from Uncle Ivan, he sells awful shit. I fucking died cause I hit the spike wall. If you hit the spike wall twice in a row then you are dead forever. If you die in the dream, then you die in real life, so call Christopher Nolan and tell him you are sick of his Inception bullshit, yeah. I don't give a shit if people call him visionary, da right, no I don't care because I watched Dunkirk and it scared me to hell. I saw Harry Styles and I didn't know it was him cause he was not singing songs, he was trying to act, and he wasn't half bad, but still movie scared me cause wartime is a bad time and I don't want to be in a bad time with the Germans burning down my neck. I am running out of breath.

At least it playing the Song of People. This the song of Eggsy people. It is called a folklore polka polka dance. First you put your leg in, then you put other leg in, then you put arm in, then you talk about Armin from Attack on Titan. Shake it all about, sexy pretty lady, mama, yeah. I am a duck, came from egg just like Jesus did. That's, that's how the song goes, the Song of People. Wait I'm doing it again? I didn't, I didn't wanna do it again. Song of People, Song of People, this is Song of People. It gets a little faster when you have some vodka. Don't bother drinking piss from Ivan's store. He sells cheap shit, not the good stuff. Need to go to Victor's shop and ask for Sven. He has the good vodka, he is my friend.

Don't worry, Daddy's coming. Daddy's gotta suck a whole lot of mangos off a tree first though. No loud music after seven, ok? The neighbors complain. Yes, I know I fucking hate the neighbors but we don't want a lawsuit, or police! You almost made me walk of the cliff! Don't have kids.

It's because of his mother's side of the family. She was an ex-giraffe gymnast. Excellent climbers, giraffes. So Eggsy has a bit of giraffe in him. He misses his mom. I wish his mom could be here to give him love and support. She could train him better than I ever could, but I'm trying my best AS A SINGLE DUCK!

Oh, but look at this the ball is breaking into the left field side. the gorillas ares trying to play catch-up, but if they don't get to it soon, nothing is going to happen because I thought it was going to the goal but that's ok, it's not. My eyes aren't what they used to be. Ever since I looked at that eclipse that one time. They told me to look at it when the moon was over the sun, I decided to go against that because I'm cool like that. Really wish someone would score a fucking goal.

Hmm. Ok, wait, hold on, hold on, hold on. I'm going back out here, and I'm gonna get mint mangos, and then I'm gonna feed them to my kids, and everyone's gonna be happy, and your mom's not gonna fucking sue me for alimony money again. You know what I mean? We're all gonna have a good time. It'd be like we're a big happy family again, before she left me for that fucking ski instructor. That guy was a douchebag anyway. I didn't like him.

Recenter. Focused. Zen. All the way, right into the center of madness. Into the center of Hell we go, with our dicks hanging out, flopping them everywhere. If you don't have a dick, yeah I probably wouldn't stick my dick out anyway. Even if you had one, that's a slight sexual harassment, so forget I said anything.

Ah, Mercy, no! I loved her like a sun! Not like a son like a son or daughter. I loved her like a big giant fireball in the sky, cause she was giving me life like the sun gives us life. You know? It's an analogy.

Congrats! Good to have you back.

So this blog turned 1 year old yesterday! I know I haven’t been posting any quotes for a long time, and thats pretty much because I stopped watching Jack for a while, but Im back now, and even though Im like 4 months behind on videos Im still gonna be on the lookout for stuff to post.

Ok, you know what? I'm gonna get a snack. I'm gonna fuel up, and let's fucking fuck some butts. Are you with me?