Dubious Little Creature

coworker: it's good to see that centrifuge getting some use; most people don't like it because it's so sensitive me: *has been devising nobel prize-worthy balance configurations for every single load* haha yeah i guess i've just been lucky with it so far :)

the feelings i'm experiencing about this are akin to when a pet comes up to greet you and its owner is like "omg i never see them go up to strangers like that they're usually so shy"

developing a horse girl-like bond with the centrifuge

centrifuge: *shudders or makes noise* me: *patting its flank* shhhh... it's okay, girl...

I'm fairly certain the answer will be "because they don't want to spend money", but is there a reason your workplace doesn't just get a new centrifuge, maybe one with auto-balancing?

because the centrifuge works fine if you're pure of heart

next time you encounter something confusing, try using your fan fiction reading device to access websites like "wikipedia" or "miriam webster" to break down those pesky difficult topics. its sorta like a "enemies to lovers" situation, where the scary new knowledge can become your friend - and then you won't look so unflattering when you comment

hey guysss so unfortunately the rumors are true and im leaving the narrative. Buttt the good news is my absence will create such a gaping hole in your lives that it will become a sort of presence itself, and so in a way it will kind of be like i never left! But i am. Leaving just to be clear.

is it okay for a man to have a bob..........

also are we sure that's a man. there could be estrogen in the chocolate (imagines willy wonka as a beautiful and frightening woman) you know I think I could forgive anyone for turning a child blue and spherical