Kali♫

hiya guysss! this is my official masterlist.

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i’m not comfortable writing

stuff i will write

who i write for

marks:

✈︎(fluff)

ஐ(smut)

𖠋(hc’s)

𖠘 (angst)

𝖰𝗎𝖺𝖼𝗄𝗂𝗍y

𝖪𝗎𝖻𝗓 𝖲𝖼𝗈𝗎𝗍𝗌

𝖲𝖺𝗆 𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝖢𝗈𝗅𝖻𝗒

𝖲𝖺𝗆 𝖦𝗈𝗅𝖻𝖺𝖼𝗁

𝖢𝗈𝗅𝖻𝗒 𝖡𝗋𝗈𝖼𝗄

Series:

He's so sweet and gentle, the type to fall in love with. Huge ego but with all reason. Got along with everyone, caring for people who weren't even his friends. All the girls swooned for him, he also had the face of an angel. Why would he ever like you? He has options lined up, girls who fall over from just a glimpse they get from him. You had been crushing on Hu-min for a while now, he was your friend; you knew it was wrong to like a friend so much, but the universe had other plans.

Unknown to you, Park Hu-min also liked you as well. Everytime he’d see you in the hallways his whole face would light up. When you hung out, he always made sure he paid or brought snacked over to your house. Made you laugh more than any other. It was ridiculous how head over heels he was for you, but he always kept to himself. He was scared of you not feeling the same, scared of rejection. 

One of these days, you’ll miss your train, and come stay with me

You had just got done hanging out. You had walked him back to the train station and decided to stay until his train got there. “Gosh how late does this train run?” You ask the black haired boy standing next to you. “Uhh, should’ve been here 5 minutes ago..” “Maybe it’s just running late?” “Maybe, let’s just stay for a few more.” 5 minutes went by, then 10, then 20. By now, both of you have been standing there for 30 minutes. “Awh come on, it’s freezing. Are you sure you had the right train?” You turn to ask. “Yeah I do, look” he hands you his phone. You check it and groan in frustration. “Baku you idiot! This was for 7:30, not 8:30! oh gosh we just stood out here for no reason!” you exclaimed, running a hand over your face. “I’m sorry.. I must’ve read the time wrong..” He said sheepishly, rubbing the back of his neck. He grinned slightly though, because little did you know, he had done it on purpose.

You sleep here, I sleep there, but then the heating may be down again (at my convenience)

 You're now getting ready for bed, Baku still in the same clothes from your hangout. You had stayed up talking for god knows how long. Your bed is big enough for the two of you, but only leaving little space. “You can take the right side.” You both settle down in the bed, and you leave as much space as possible. “Awh come on Y/n, I don’t bite.” He says teasingly, laying and facing your direction. “Well..I don’t want you to be uncomfortable.” You say quietly, laying your back against the headboard. “I’m not uncomfortable with you Y/n, you know that. Well I'm not uncomfortable with anyone, but you’re just so..” He trails off, staring at you. You slowly advert your eyes to his, curious on what he was gonna say. “So what?” You ask, tilting your head. His hand finds your cheek, gently and sweetly.

“So perfect..” He strokes your cheek. Your breath hitches slightly, and you lean into his touch slightly. God, it felt like heaven. Everything you had wished for, you couldn’t imagine a life like this. Finally Hu-min’s girlfriend, being able to call him your boyfriend, it was the eternal bliss you had helplessly hoped for. But instead, you leaned out of hand gently. “Uhm..let’s go to sleep? hm?” You then turned away from him, laying down finally. Baku was left dumbfounded, hand still floating in the air where it was touching you. He lowered it slowly, thinking he crossed a boundary. Then, something shut off in the corner and it got really cold. “Shit, shit, shit!” You exclaimed out loud, groaning in frustration. It had been really cold in South Korea, and the heating breaking down was the last thing you needed.

We’d be good, we’d be great together

You both sat there for a few minutes, clutching yourselves and the blanket. It had got record breakingly cold in jude that time alone. Both of you are facing away from each other now, deep in thought. You, thinking about how cold it is, Baku, thinking of an excuse to get close to you. “It’s really cold, yeah?” His voice cracks through the silence of the tiny room. “Yeah, very. Do you have enough blankets?” Before he can answer, you get up and grab another throw over for him. “Here.” you put one knee down on the bed, leaning over him slightly with the blanket raised ready to be handed over. Hu-min turned to look over his shoulder, then turned completely to face you. “Blankets are overrated.” He stated simply, then he grabbed your waist and pulled you don’t to lay next to him.

It’s bad enough we get along so well

His hand stayed there, the blanket still in your hands awkwardly. “Oh.” you mutter out, completely shocked and flustered. He grabs the blanket from you, pulling it over both of your bodies. “You’re warmer to me, like a personal heater.” His hand moves back to your waist, pulling you closer. “What are you-“ “Y/n.” He cut you off softly. “Yeah?” you ask quietly, looking at him in the eyes. “I meant what I said earlier,” His hand comes back up to your face as he stares at you with adoration written all over his face. “you're beautiful.” You didn’t think, you just reacted—and your reaction was a kiss to the lips. At first you just thought “What the hell am I doing?” But, it didn’t really matter. Why doesn’t it matter? You worked so hard to push your feelings aside, scared of getting hurt. Scared of your rejection, scared of…unrequited love. But he initiated, he called you beautiful, he liked you. You. That’s when everything else didn’t really seem to matter. Finally, you both pulled back, and you couldn’t help but laugh. Hu-min smiled at you. “What?” “I guess the heating went down at my convenience.” He was the one to laugh now. “You’re ridiculous gosh, maybe that’s why I like you so much.” Your breath caught in your throat. “You-“ Once again he cut you off, but this time with a quick kiss. Then another, then one more. “Yes, I like you. A lot.” You thought for a moment, before responding with 

“I like you too.”

Just say goodnight and go⋆𐙚₊˚⊹♡

You keep me in your orbit, well I know i’m a hard one to please

Your relationship with Megumi was…none of the less complicated. You were together yes but it felt more as if lust over love. Through early years, he was always so cold and distant towards everyone, including you. But then one night after a mission, both of you exhausted and frustrated, you hooked up. It was supposed to be “let out the frustration” sex, but it felt real, cold but very satisfying, the kind that had you rolling your eyes back and back arching off the bed. “Lay right. And don’t take your eyes off of me.” Megumi grunted with another hard thrust.

Steering clear of any headaches to start, and if we’re being honest, I’d rather your body then half of your heart

There was Megumi was, sitting down and letting another girl touch all over him. You stare in shock, and all he does is turn to you and smirk widely. You had just got to a friend's party, arriving a little late because you wanted to look good for Megumi, and hopefully get laid, since it was his only way of showing love. You walked around looking for him when you saw the sight, how her hands ran up his body. How he didn’t touch her but looked to be enjoying the attention—and her. Before the tears could fall in front of everyone, you ran out, and he just watched, making no move to get up and stop you. 

I never let ‘em know too much, hating getting too emotional yeah

“Oh come on, you know I was drunk.” He tries to play it off. It’s irritating you that he’s trying to make it seem less important than it is. “Megumi, you basically cheated!” you screamed at him, tears spilling down your face. “Your over reacting gosh, calm down.” With that you just left the room.

Megumi was now talking to Choso, who had seen you crying. “So..what happened?” Choso asks him. “She’s crying because some girl was touching me.” Megumi replied, because somehow he knew exactly what Choso was talking about. Choso stared at him in disbelief that he didn’t have any feelings about this, but also with none at all because Megumi had feelings for nothing and no one. “Did you apologize?” “Apologize for what? It’s not like I cheated, I didn’t touch her.” “You did cheat.” “How?” The two boys just stared at each other, going back and forth.

“She should’ve never gotten involved with you.” Then Choso walked away. “What does that mean?” Megumi shouted at him, but he just kept on walking. “Huh? What the hell is wrong with him?” Although Megumi wasn’t one to feel any type of emotion, he felt a little bit bad. He definitely loved you, he just had a funny way of showing it. Through late night sex, make up sex, whenever you want—wait.

Later, you finally got the apology, or half of one. “Yeah i’m sorry or whatever.” Megumi said, face in his phone. “That’s it?” “Well what more do you want me to say? I’m not a psychic.” 

Go on and face it, I’ll never be ready for you

Then it happened, again, and again. Everyone tried to tell you. “Hes bad news.” “He doesn’t know how to love, let alone be in a relationship.” “He’ll never love you.” but you didn’t listen, you stayed anyway. The thought of getting through Megumi, the guy notorious for never letting anyone in, was chewing at your mind. You were already halfway there, why stop now? 

You have to understand Y/n, he loves you, he just doesn’t know how to show you. I mean, you already gave him a chance, don’t start wondering now if it’s worth it.

I’m better off without him

Late night, late late. Megumi unlocks the door to your shared apartment clumsily. Stumbling in, he takes off his shoes and throws them god knows where. You were up writing reports, but that was only partially the reason why you would up. You’d never admit you were up for Megumi. You didn’t even turn around when you heard the door open. “Where were you?”

I’m better off being a wild one

“Wouldn’t you like to know?” His response was sharp, well thought out, for a drunk person of course. You didn’t even have to ask, as soon as the door closed your nose smelled of whiskey with a chase of something. The way he threw his shoes and keys carelessly, it wasn’t hard to tell. “Why are you up anyways? It’s late.” He slurs, plopping down on the couch facing your back. “Where were you Megumi.” Your tone made it clear you weren’t asking. Megumi was a little taken aback, never getting talked to like that, especially by you. “I went out for a few drinks with Yuji and Tojo, problem?” “Yeah, huge problem.” “What is it illegal for me to go out with friends? Sorry, I didn’t know everything I did had to revolve around you and your time.” His voice dripped in sarcastic venom, it hurt, but your anger quickly overshadowed it. “I never said that!” You turn sharply to face him, face filled with uncontrollable rage and hurt. No matter how mad you were, you had this permanent softness in your eyes that always shows. That’s why he never took you seriously. “I just want you to be loyal, show me your feelings? What do you feel for me?” Megumi stayed quiet, the silence speaking louder than words ever could, that’s when you knew.

Tojo had already shown you. At around 12 you had a picture sent to your phone, a picture of Megumi and a pretty blonde girl, dancing and grinding on each other. “I’m tired, I’m so fucking tired of acting like this shit doesn’t effect me.” For once, Megumi actually had nothing to say, his actions finally catching up to him. “I gave you a chance, but somehow you always acted like you were doing me a favor.” You stalked towards him, getting all up in his face. “I’m gonna set this straight for you right now, you're not good for me. You don’t care about me, so I’m done.” It felt amazing, finally standing your ground, not letting him walk all over you. 

You were never home anyways, but you always tried to make time. Staying on the road for missions 5 days a week, sometimes everyday. So maybe, if you broke up, it would hurt less. But you really, really

tried.

You’d get over it, right?

So that, I’m better off, not being around ya

Heavy gasps and whimpers are all that’s heard in the small bedroom of his. Hu-min is under you, eating at your cunt relentlessly. Yes, Park Hu-min, the guy you’ve hated for years because of his loud and cocky personality. The guy you constantly bickered with constantly over the smallest things. You really don’t know how you got in a situation like this, you were just talking to him, a genuine conversation outside of the school gates, then all the sudden this happened. Your body is shaking with pleasure on how good he is, like his mouth was made for it. Your hand has a steady grip on his hair, tugging and pulling everything his tongue hits your bud or his fingers thrust into your g-spot.

“B..baku I can’t..” You say breathlessly, suddenly becoming overwhelmed with the pleasure. You had a tendency for getting overstimulated in situations like this, and Hu-min knew, which is why he looked up at you and smirked against your clit. “Awh, can you not take it?” He says, as if mocking you for being too weak. He suddenly stops his movement, making you whimper at the loss of constant despite the words you just uttered. “Oh now you're needy? I thought you couldn’t handle it Y/n. And that’s so shocking coming from you since you hate me so much.” You hated the fact Baku had this much power over you. Yes, you did hate him, but damn. You could never ignore the fact that he was so handsome, and how he’d stick up for others, some things he did made you look more than once, and you hated it. “Well, your gonna take it, whether you like it or not. I’m gonna make you eat your words sweetheart.” You didn’t even get a chance to respond before he dived right back in.

Your eyes rolled back slightly as he truly did make you regret any words you’ve ever said, and you hate to admit the pet name affected you more than it should. Your legs started to shake as your eyes welded up with tears from the overwhelming pleasure. “I can’t! I swear I-“ One hand comes up to cover your mouth. “Stop. Talking. You're gonna take it.” You moan against his hand, his commanding tone making you wetter. Tears now started flowing down your face as you clench around his fingers. “Gonna cum? Let go for me.” His final command coursed through your body as your back arched off the bed and you cummed all over his mouth and fingers. Baku kept pumping to ride out your high, then he finally stopped.

A satisfied sigh comes from both of you as you catch your breath. Baku finally came up and sat beside your laying body, turning to look at you. You both stayed silent for a moment, registering what just happened was actually real. “So..are we gonna stop playing enemy and be something?” You stayed still, thinking for a moment. Usually, you’d flat out deny or reject, because it was Hu-min of course. Something made you hesitate, but it wasn’t him, it was your own feelings. “Well..I wouldn’t know how to.” The words fall out before you can stop them as you stare at the ceiling. “Hey, look at me.” He says as he brings his finger up to your chin, turning your face towards his as he lays down beside you. “I’ve liked you for a long time Y/n, you always saw through my bullshit. Even though I know you hate me-" “I don’t hate you.” You say sincerely, finally looking at him like he was a pure human being instead how you’d always used to glare. 

He caught the memo fast, a realization dawning in his eyes. “You never hated me, you were just hiding behind your feelings for me.” He says, like he’d been preparing for this moment to come. He tucks a strand of hair behind your ear, then cups your cheek. “Let’s try Y/n.” You shouldn’t say yes, it would be so hard going from that to this. Not being enemies, becoming something real and going on dates, and holding hands, and kissing. Which was your last thought before Hu-min brought his lips to yours, kissing you sweetly. You stay still for a moment, some traces of you still on his lips you can taste, before you kiss him back. It’s so natural, like your lips were sculpted to fit together perfectly. A million thoughts raced through your head but you only seemed to be focused on him. Baku pulls away first, but only to breathe. You’re positive if you both didn’t have it catch your breath, you would've kissed longer. You just stared into each other's eyes with pure adoration. “My boyfriend…” you tested it on your lips. Hu-min’s breath hitches at your declaration, completely shocked but pleased. Finally, no more hiding, just feelings that your not scared to hide anymore. “Let’s try.”

⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖ ࣪

Jun-tae never got girls, in fact almost everyone looked over him at school. He was just the boy who brought everyone snacks. Then you came in, his life was horrible but you lit his whole world up. He loved you so dearly, and so did you. You never thought you would break up. 

Until you had to move schools across the country.

“You’re moving schools? but doesn’t that mean…” He trials off, searching your eyes. “Jun-tae..” “Y/n please don’t do this to me.” Jun-tae’s little sobs break through the surface. “You’re everything I have, y/n please I can’t lose you!” He looks at you with that same hopeless look in his eyes, the same look that he had when you saw him getting bullied one time, the way you met and fell in love. Unable to hold it any longer, you start crying too, a whole relationship gone and down the drain. You hug for a long while just hyperventilating in each other's arms, until you get a text. “Jun-tae..Jun-tae” you say softly as you lift up his face. “I have to go pack for my flight.” you say reluctantly, wishing the words were never leaving your mouth. Hearing that, his lips quivered violently as another choked sob leaves him and his eyes close. You have to look away to keep from crying again, the sight alone making you want to curl up into a ball and call it a day.

you hope that in the near future you’d come back, and somehow Jun-tae would still be waiting for you, but the likelihood of that happening is little to none. You hate for it to end this way but, you both knew it couldn’t work long distance. So there, you carry all your love with you to that flight to London, hoping to give it back one day.

PARK HU-MIN

Eunjang High was the only school that wasn’t in the union, so therefore everyone hated them. They got beat up relentlessly with no mercy, and it was all because of Ba-ku. He never wanted to join the union, mostly because Na Baek-jin ran it. Once inseparable, they were like two peas in a pod, until Hu-min taught him how to fight, that’s when hell broke loose. They fell out in early childhood years but still carry a sort of care for one another, a pretty fucked up type of care but it’s still there. Park Hu-min joined the union after his former best friend threatened to keep beating up his best friends and sending his father to jail. No one knew, yet. He grew distant and didn’t answer calls from anyone, not even his girlfriend. He had already pushed his friends away, so you decided to end it before he could hurt you next.

*Ring* once, *Ring* twice, then straight to voicemail. This was the 4th time at least with no answer. You sighed heavily, then sat down your phone slightly defeated. You should’ve known better than to think he would after what he did. But then the phone rang. Once, then twice, before the third you picked it up faster than ever before, answering it and putting it up to your ear. “Hello?” There was a moment of silence. “Ba-ku, what’s going on with you?” Your voice picks up quietly as you struggle to find words. The whole situation had taken a toll on you severely, especially since you and him were once inseparable. But you knew what had to be done. “Ba-ku…I think we both know this relationship is over.” That’s when he finally spoke with a heavy sigh. “Look’s like you beat me to it.” Your heart broke, you expected a fight, especially since he used to be so devoted to you. Now it felt like you were talking to a hollow shell of your boyfriend. “It’s for the better Y/n.” Then he hung up. You cried, and cried, not knowing how he could’ve ended it so easily. On the other end of the phone, Ba-ku lowered the phone from his ear, staring straight ahead. He had just got done stealing a motorcycle and taking it to the union when he had got the 4th call right before seeing it go to voicemail. He had called back hesitantly, but he soon regretted it. His whole world was already crashing down, he knew he needed to break up with you but just couldn’t bring himself to do it. But you doing it before him just killed all the fire he had left inside of him. He hated his life right now, and felt as if he was throwing it away. Although it hurt to let everyone go in his life, he knew it was the right thing to do.

GO HYUN-TAK

Your parents thought he was a bad influence, so they made you do something that you would've never imagined.

You and Go-tak were an inseparable pair. Always together, holding hands, or in his lap. You’d be in the first row at all his basketball games, cheering the loudest when he’d score or win. Gosh, this man loved you with every ounce of power in him. He’d defend you, take care of you, take up for you in the snap of a finger. Go-tak is a little bit of a bad boy, teasing others and almost getting into fights but it never escalated. One of the main reasons you found him attractive is his ambition to never back down from a challenge. You met through his good friend Hu-min, who knew you’d end up getting together because you were each other's exact types. “Hey I'm hosting a little get together, it’ll be fun! don’t be a party pooper, plus, there’s something I want you to meet~” Hu-min exclaimed to Go-tak, shaking his shoulder, which he pushed off. “Gosh you're so annoying Ba-ku.” He said, looking away in mock annoyance. “So your…coming?” “You're impossible..” And the rest was history.

Go-tak looked around helpless, scoffing slightly, then back at you. “Well, there has to be something you can do right? something you can say?” He says as you stare at him, tears welding up in your eyes. He grabs one of your hands gently “Right..Y/n?” then you saw a tear drop. You had never seen Go-tak cry, only one time when he lost an important basketball tournament in the final game a long time ago. Seeing his tear made yours reciprocate and drop as well, slowly, deliberately, and agonizing. “Go-tak…I tried, I tried and they didn’t..” you say as your voice cracks on the last word. “They didn’t listen, I love you, I’m sorry.” A choked sob leaves both of you almost simultaneously “I’m so sorry Go-tak..” you heave. His hand slaps over his eyes as he tries to stop crying, sniffling and back going up and down fast. “Y/n you can’t do this to me! I need you!” he slightly yells in pain, head falling on your shoulder. You hated that you were doing this to him, breaking his heart like this. If only your parents just saw the potential in the love of your life, everything would be okay. But they don’t trust you, or him. Making a final decision, you just hold him for a while, knowing it’ll be your last time.

You hated for it to end this way, as for Megumi you didn't know so much. He’d always so closed off, distant, and too himself. It was destined to fail from the start, but you still gave it a chance. You can’t even remember who you got together, just remember begging him to go out with you just once. He finally accepted after the 5th time, then you went out again, and again. You truly loved Megumi, so much it hurt, and all you wanted was for him to show that he loved you too, and he did, he just didn’t—or rather couldn’t show it. and on top of that, he was going on dangerous missions almost all the time, and lately he was out a lot of them. He’d come back home bloody and injured, which made you more and more on edge about his whereabouts.

On one particular night, he got back super late. It was at least 3 in the morning, and you had been up all night just thinking about your relationship. Megumi walked through the door blood stained , spotting you on the couch. “Why are you still up?” he asked, controlled voice but slightly concerned. “I couldn’t sleep.” you say flatly, still staring straight ahead. “You shouldn’t be up this late.” Megumi gruffed out as he walked to the kitchen to wash his hands and look for something to eat. He was so calm, too calm it was almost gut wrenching to you, no “I missed you” or “How are you?” from him, just nothing. All you can do is sigh heavily. This sigh was enough to catch his attention, he turned off the water and looked up at you from the kitchen opening, tilting his head slightly. “Something wrong?” he asked, uninterested. “I’ve been thinking a lot about us..” you say quietly, finally turning your head to look at him. He knew where the conversation was heading, so he straightened his head back up. “Mm.” he mumbled. “I think we should…go our separate ways.” The silence was deafening, so quiet you could hear a leaf hit the pavement outside on the cold autumn night.

“Well..what did i do?” Megumi asked. “I just…I can’t be with someone who I know could die on a mission at any second. I love you Megumi, but the constant worrying tells me it’s not worth it. And… I don’t feel like you love me.” Megumi’s lips slightly quivered with controlled contained emotions, but you could slightly see the tiniest bit of hurt in his cold eyes. You stare at him for a second, searching his eyes for anything—for him to say anything, but nothing fell from his lips. No hesitation, no true sense of what’s going on in that head of his. You sigh one more time, just grabbing your keys and leaving, not knowing where you're even gonna go this late in the night. Megumi just watched you leave your shared apartment, gripping the counter so hard it could break. “Fuck..” he said, knowing he just lost you, and there was nothing he could do about it.

CHOSO KAMO

Choso was the perfect man. So attentive and caring. He really values his family and his relationships. You’re his sunshine, his light in the darkness, relationship so perfect people would think it’s fake. Therefore he promised to himself he would never hurt you, and that was exactly the problem. 

Choso was so gentle that he never wanted to touch you in the way you wanted. Every time you’d get to going farther than kissing, he’d redirect your attention to something else. “Sweetheart…how about we just watch a movie?” and at this point, you grew so sexually frustrated it hurt. You wanted to give Choso all of you completely to show him you're committed, but he just couldn’t imagine accidentally hurting you. Right now you're trying once again, short shorts and tight t-shirt. Right now you're just kissing on top of him, his touch is gentle, one hand on your neck and one on your waist. As your hand started to travel lower, he suddenly stopped your hand gently. “Baby, how about we-“ “We what, Choso?” your tone shocked him slightly. “What’s wrong?” he asked, suddenly worried. “This is ridiculous..” You mumble as you get up from his lap. He just stared at you, hurt and slightly pouting. “Choso, do you even love me?” you asked seriously but softly. His whole composure cracks from your question. “Baby, what are you talking about? Of course I love you, your perfect..a-and beautiful, and so-“ you cut him off before he can finish. “Then why would you do anything with me?” you ask, voice barely above a whisper. All of it got to you at once. “Y/n…it’s complicated. I-I just don't want to hurt you.” he says, looking down ashamed. “Choso, I can't do this anymore.” his head snaps up at that. “You don’t mean that Y/n, let me tell you you're joking.” but the look in your eyes indicates you're not joking. Finally, Choso let out a choked sob, and he falls to his knees off the bed and in front of you. His hands find your legs, gripping them tightly as he looks up at you bawling his eyes out. “Y/n please don’t do this, please, please. I love you so much, I can’t live without you..” he sobs uncontrollably, the words coming out in broken English. The sight alone makes your heart ache for him as you feel tears swell up in your own eyes. “Choso..you have to try for me.” you beg subtly. “I don’t want to hurt you, my precious. I’m just so scared.” he says, still looking up at you with love and fear in his eyes. “Please Choso…try, for me?” you tilt your head slightly, helping him to his feet. “…Okay. Just don’t ever do that again.” “I won’t” you say, intertwining your fingers. “Pinky promise?” he asks quietly. “Pinky promise” you say at the same volume, lacing your pinky’s together. Let’s just say you got what you wanted, and so did he. 

It was a random Tuesday, so out of nowhere. “I want to break up, Si-eun.” your voice cut through the thick air and tension in the school classroom. He just stared at you, breath slightly staggering but not enough to notice, not sad, not upset, zero emotion. He’s always been this way, whenever something good happens or bad, no reaction, like he was born without them. and that’s what pushed you to the edge, you were too much of a happy person, and you felt as if you deserved an equally happy partner. Si-eun, on the other hand, has heard this countless of times before. his mother abandoned him, came back into his life, his best friend was in a coma, he has little to no friends, he has multiple enemies who’ve beat him up countless times. He’s only shown emotion a few times, and every time he did, he pushed it further and further down. You, were his only escape. He loved you with all his heart, but just can’t show it. Your bubbly persona was enough to put him in a trance, the life he needed in his life. He needed you. And you needed him, something he couldn’t give to you. Despite his heart quite literally breaking into a thousand pieces, he maintained his unconcerned expression. “Fine, you should’ve just never got involved in the first place.” he put simply, before turning and walking out of the classroom. You should know better than to think he’d fight for you, but you cry anyways. Alone, walking through the hallway, all Si-eun feels is his heavy footsteps and the guilt he’s carrying for letting you go so easily. But he’d much rather let you go, than to hurt you once more.

AHN SU-HO

You rush down to the school front yard, heart pounding out of your chest. As soon as you make it to the front courtyard you stop in your tracks. There he was, Su-ho, your boyfriend, in a fight with someone, on top of them and punching repeatedly. He’s clearly winning, blood dripping from his opponents face and Su-ho’s knuckles. Before Su-ho could land another hit, you run up and shout in front of the crowd. “Su-ho!” voice loud enough to make everyone stop talking. Su-ho turns his head and sees you, face dropping immediately. Then, dead silence. Everyone is staring at you and Su-ho, as if expecting one of you to say something, anything. But nothing comes out, you just stare at him on the brink of tears. He drops his fist and the guy’s collar at once. You could’ve yelled, you could’ve said anything, instead you just turned and walked away, finally letting the tears fall on your face and down your neck. Su-ho finally starts running after you, knowing he messed up badly this time. You told him countless times before, “Stop fighting Su-ho, I'm not dating a delinquent.” but he never ever listened, fighting was his calling. The desire and your projection were clashing hard—like gasoline to a fire. “Y/n, wait! Please wait!” Then you finally stop, turning sharply to face him. “We’re done, Su-ho! I’m tired! I’m so fucking tired of telling you to stop, over and over and over! You obviously love it more than me, so stay loyal to the beatings.” your words and tone could cut through stone, at least to him. “Y/n…you don’t mean that..” he says, trying to convince himself more than you. “No, I do. I absolutely do.” You conclude, and walk away. Su-ho tries to weakly call for you, but you never stop. He finally lets himself drop to his knees, all the weight falling down right back onto his shoulders. Now you're gone and the only thing left is the matching bracelet on his wrist, which was now ironically covered in blood. Now, all the fighting seemed worthless, because he lost one of the most important people in his life. He loved you so much, but couldn’t change for you.

OH BEOM-SEOK

He knew good and well it was coming, he knew he had changed. Once super shy and bullied, now doing the bullying and getting involved with them, even putting a former friend into a coma. The news never got out because his dad was a famous politician, so he buried it quickly with tip off’s and lawyers. “You are such an idiot, get him on the first flight to the Philippines. Send him to be a transfer student.” It didn’t even hurt Beom-seok, there was nothing left for him in Seoul, except you. You were his everything, sweet with tender loving care. Everything was so perfect in the beginning. But you noticed, how he avoided eye contact, how he’d stay out late. You were friends with Si-eun too, and that’s when he told you that Beom-Seok put Su-ho in a coma. Your world shattered because he was like a brother to you, then you grew to hate your boyfriend. Everything happened so fast you wouldn’t never known it hit you. Then you got a knock at your door, and you opened it already knowing who was standing on the other side. Beom-seok, unreadable expression. “What?”, “I’m transferring, to the Philippines.” he says. “That’s all you have to say?” you ask in disbelief. “You put my best friend in a coma! You nearly got him killed Beom-seok!” He just stared at you, then looked down in guilt. “You know, the relationship was never gonna work if you were moving schools so, it’s over.” you then proceeded to shut the door in his face. Beom-seok let the tears he was holding fall down his face, now finally regretting everything he’s done. He threw a friendship away over a stupid misunderstanding, lost another friend for being dumb, and now lost his girlfriend because he just couldn’t hold in his anger. He turned away from your door, walking off the porch and into the darkness of the night, having to go get ready for his flight. But no new country could ever wash away what he did in Korea, and what he lost.

I ask when I see him curled up on the floor, sobbing uncontrollably. “They rejected our email Y/n… t-they don’t want us at their building.” I knew exactly what he was talking about. There had been this haunted place Sam and Colby always wanted to go to, but it seems like they don’t want them there. I sigh, “I’m so sorry colby” I say as I hug him. He hugs back, crying into my shirt and clinging to me like a lost dog. “Do you wanna go get some ice cream?” I ask in hopes of cheering him up. “Yeah, that’ll be nice. Thanks Y/n.”

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Colby and I have been dating for close to a year now and… how's it been? it’s hard to explain. Of course all of us have our ups and downs and you're supposed to go into it supporting your partner. I never had a problem doing that, but I can help but feel like Colby doesn’t do it. I can think of quite a few times when I felt down, and he was nowhere to be found. But maybe I'm overreacting, maybe he didn’t find those important.

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“Hey Tara!” I say as I pull up to the coffee shop door. “Hi Y/n! Long time no see huh?” she says. “I know! I’m so glad you could meet up with me today, really!” I tell her. “Of course.” We both walk into the coffee shop, order a cup and sit down by the window seat. “So, how’s life been? With colby? I know your 1 year anniversary is coming up." She breaks the silence. “Yea about that.. I don’t know Tara. I’m always there for him especially when he’s down, but I don’t feel like he’s there for me.” I say. “Oh really? I’m so sorry to hear that, can you tell me one time this happened?” She asks. I sigh, “This one time, I got rejected from the modeling agency that I really wanted to be apart of. I cried and everything, it was really important to me. And I just know Colby knew because Sam called me and asked me about it, and he definitely told Colby about it. But I never got a phone call, text, nothing.” I explained. “Oh wow;” Tara pauses “well maybe Sam didn’t tell Colby?” “But Colby calls me everyday, so the one day something happens to me, he doesn’t call? It’s like he doesn’t want to deal with it, with me. I gave him attention when nobody else was paying, why can’t he do it for me?” I say, starting to tear up. “Aw Y/n, don’t cry.” Tara says as she wipes the tear off my face. “If it really bothers you, talk to him about it. Maybe he’ll understand.” she concludes. Before I can respond, I get a phone call and I answer, mouthing a “sorry” to Tara. “Hello?” I ask. “Hello, is this Ms.L/n?” the other person asks. “Yes, who’s asking?” I ask. As soon as the person stops talking, I sink down in my chair. Starting to cry, I ask “A-are you serious? Where is she?” I ask. They respond again and I start crying harder. Tara on the other end of me mouths “What’s wrong?” I hang up the phone. “She’s dead Tara…”

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I’m currently sitting on my couch sobbing uncontrollably into my pillow and screaming in pain. I can’t believe she’s gone. I get a phone call, I secretly hope it’s Colby. It’s just Sam. I answer, still sobbing. “Y/n i’m so sorry…” Sam immediately says. “I don’t know what to do Sam, my sister, she’s gone..” I say, starting to cry harder. “I know, " Tara told the friend group… Y/n I'm here for you, I’ll go to the funeral.” He says. “Thank you Sam, where’s Colby?” “He’s up in his room I think, Tara told him too” and he’s up in his room? not on his way over here? “Where are you now when I need you?” I whisper, sobbing more. “Y/n, how about I come over? we can order food, watch a movie..” “That'll be nice, thank you Sam”

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It’s now been 2 days since my sister died, and I've been so depressed. All the planning over the phone, we decided to have the funeral as soon as possible, so she can rest peacefully. She died in a car accident, driving on a really rainy day. A big 18 wheeler went off track and It's back wheel collided with my sister's car. It spun her out of the road, and into a tree. The scene was gruesome, as I was told, because I didn't want to see it. My sister was my best friend, and now she’s gone.. The other sad part is, Nothing. My phone was as dry as cobwebs, with no texts or calls from Colby. Now I'm all alone, my joy turned to moping. All of my friends sent something, but him. That made it even worse for me, my sister dying and this is the cherry on top. My own boyfriend doesn’t care about me.

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I’m now packing, getting ready to get on a plane back to my hometown so I can go to the funeral. All of the sudden there’s a knock on my front door. I argue with myself, debating if I should open the door or not. I ultimately decide to, walking downstairs and to the front door. I open it and it’s Colby, he’s crying. Maybe he does care… “Y/n, another place rejected me. I need you right now..” he sniffles. I sigh angrily, looks like I was right. he doesn’t care, he never cared. “Colby, I have no time for this.” I turn around heading back upstairs. Colby looks confused, almost as if he’s wondering why I didn't comfort him this time. “What's your problem?” he asks and he follows me upstairs. “Nothing.” I reply dryly, going into my room. “Stop lying to me.” Colby responds coldly, walking in after me. I turn to face him, “You wanna know what my problem is? It’s you!” I yell. He looks taken aback, not expecting my outburst. “What did I do?” he asks, starting to get irritated, I can hear it in his voice. “Colby, are you serious or are you just dumb? I have no time to be dealing with you right now!” I tell him. “Well tell me what I did-!” “My sister is dead and you expect me to sit here with you?!” He suddenly goes silent. “I know you knew too, Sam told me that Tara told you. And you know what’s really sad? Everybody texting me except for you. I knew you never cared about me! You just see me as a dog you can drag around and use for support! Well, I need support too!” i pause, starting to tear up

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“I can think of all the times When you broke down, I never left you! I gave you the key when the door wasn’t open, but you won’t admit it!” I stop, sobbing. “Y/n, it was never like that.” Colby argues. “But it was, I gave you the shirt off my back. What are you saying? Just to keep you warm. Now I know you won’t do the same. And I was on my knees, when no one else was praying. I was praying for you. Why is it so hard to pray for me!?” I yell again. “Y/n-“ “Get out.” I say. “What?” Colby says. “We’re done. By the time i get back, I want all of your stuff out of my house, matter of fact. you can take it now” I grab my suitcase, dragging it downstairs. “It can’t end like this Y/n please listen to me-“ I interrupt. “You can grab all of your stuff right now, here” I takeoff my promise ring and put it in his palm. I try to hold back my tears. “When you leave, put the extra key you have under the doormat.” I say. “Y/n please! I can’t lose you, i-i need you” he’s crying. I sniffle “My uber is here. I have to go.” I start to walk out the door. Colby grabs my arm but I quickly shake it off of me. “Don’t you ever touch me again. Hurry up and get your stuff so you can get the hell out of my house.” I say coldy as I leave the house, Colby decides to not go after me, knowing it won’t change anything. I haul my suitcase into the uber, sitting in the back and telling the driver the directions. now i’m really alone, and it’s right when..

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I need you the most.

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