cornmug

Let's all go out for tinis and bruschetta and not invite pjackk

KILL YOUR SELF!

every child should have a specific stuffed animal/toy that they develop an antagonistic relationship with

some of my most significant core memories involved getting into heated arguments with the furby who lived in my closet. essential component of my pre-teen character development. necessary anguish

i havent seen the strong as fuck ice mummy in a while. i hope shes doing ok

spring thaw. weak as fuck water mummy now

dude, this is really scary, and liminal as well. It's like the bathrooms

lukewarm vampires

no listen to me vampires are only "cold" compared to living humans who have a pulse built-in heating unit. but it's not like they have built in refrigeration. the undead aren't actually "cold" per se at best they're room temperature. lukewarm vampires

HE'S PBACKK!!!!!

Its cute when peoples understanding of Tumblr comes from screenshots of our best posts. They come here and post with a Screenshot Accent

Hey if you're feeling anxious because of this post I just want you to know you're being watched like a hawk and everyone is making fun of you and every time you ever make a mistake we go out to the woods and write it down in excruciating detail upon a big ancient oak tree that has a record of all your mistakes and we are all beautiful with aesthetically pleasing cocks and holes and breasts and we make out and what flaws we have are romanticize-able-- unlike yours-- and we are all deft cooks who produce sensual meals while we think of your lesser actions and activities.

deft cocks

around the world aropund the world

mid 70s. in the backseat with 2 honeys with huge bushes. you turn the knob on that radio and Al Green comes on. one of them asks you if you want a quaalude.

Dont be very woried about me since i deserve all of this

my lord. the two statues you commissioned are finally complete. yeah, the double-order with the vast and trunkless legs of stone and the shattered visage. i like to think we captured the sneer of cold command pretty well. it's a really thought-provoking piece my lord. very deconstructionist. i'm sure that even a traveller a thousand years from now could take one look at it and instantly recognise it must have come from an artistically enlightened culture

What if the Truman show did a queerbait arc

What if the Truman show did a queerbait arc but then they found out Truman was gay for real and had to recalibrate and their tv network would have to take a definitive stance on homosexuality, yay or nay in the late 90s and it's not like they can recast Truman. They would have to either plot him into an it's okay to be gay fake happy relationship like they did with his tv wife or try and scare him off homosexuality by doing homophobic gay misery storylines at him to try and keep him firmly in the closet.

the staccato trumpet trills from the end of TANK! but they just keep going

brp-brp-brp-brp-brp-brp-brp-brp-brp-brp-BRP-brp-brp-brp-brp-BRP-brp-brp-brp-brp-brp-brp-brp-brp-brp-brp-BRP-brp-brp-brp-brp-BRP-brp-brp-brp-brp-brp-brp-brp-brp-brp-brp-BRP-brp-brp-brp-brp-BRP-brp-brp-brp-brp-brp-brp-brp-brp-brp-brp-BRP-brp-brp-brp-brp-BRP

holy shit i am in tears