milo🚦🌼

so a lot of the time grian is portrayed as aloof, self-serving - but that's not what he's really like, is it? for all that grian gets a reputation of being cold and uncaring, if you look at how he is with his allies, it's quite the opposite. grian has such a capacity for fierce devotion that he's displayed time and time again - and the reason why it gets overlooked is because that devotion only lasts as long as the person it's directed at is there to receive it. grian will be unquestionably loyal to his allies, but only up until they die. he doesn't stay loyal after death. what's interesting about that, however, is that it doesn't mean he doesn't care. rather, i think he cares too much - not in general, but in his own eyes.

the thing about desert duo i think is that grian feels by far the most guilt over the end of third life, never able to forgive himself for destroying someone he loved so fucking much, but like. that was never the point, to scar. scar could never resent him for that, not for a second. i think the only thing scar ever wanted an apology for was everything that came after. grian, in all his guilt, just. completely tears scar down over and over because he can’t stand to be close to him, can’t risk scar throwing himself into the fire again, and all scar wants is to be let back in and to have that same closeness back. grian’s had it proven to him over and over that letting scar (or anyone else, for that matter) in will only end in ruin and he’s the one who has to keep going, to live with the weight of it all. scar asks why won’t you just let me love you? and grian asks how could you expect me to live with myself if i hurt you again?

Long limbs, Big wings