Combat Boots and Zebra Print

well now its 14 years

holy fuck, I didn’t expect this to work, I was like psh, whatever it’s just a quick reblog, but I wished my Dad would actually respond back to me AND HE FUCKING DID A FEW DAYS LATER, I GOT A FUCKING TEXT FROM MY DAD TODAY WHO HASN’T SPOKEN OR RESPONDED TO ME IN MONTHS HOLY FUCK WHAT IS THIS MAGIC IT WORKS. 

I WANTED TO SEE MY BOYFRIEND AND I DIDN’T THINK I’D GET DAYS OFF BUT THIS WEEKEND I’M HEADING UP THERE??? THIS IS CRAZY SHIT 

SO LIKE I JOKINGLY WISHED FOR MY OWN LEN KAGAMINE AND THEN LIKE A WEEK LATER I GOT A LEN NENDOROID??? H ELP

WTF OKAY SO THIS SHOT ACTUALLY WORKS BECAUSE WHEN I WISHED, I HAD WISHED MY CRUSH WOULD LIKE ME BACK AND GUESS WHAT? I HAVE A BOYFRIEND NOW. WHAT THE HELLLLL?????

ok I’ve said this before but IM DOING IT AGAIN THE FIRST TIME I SAW THIS, MY WISH DID COME TRUE SO I REBLOGED AGAIN AND SAID IT IN THE TAGS BUT THEN I WISHED FOR SMTH ELSE AND IT LITERALLY LITERALLY HAPPENED LIKE A COUPLE DAYS LATER WHAT THE HELL SO NOW IM WRITING THIS HERE FOR YOU BC I DONT BELIEVE IN THIS CRAP BUT STILL IT’S AN AWFULLY BIG COINCIDENCE

OKAY I SWEAR TO GOD THIS THING WORKS YOU HAVE TO PATIENT BC I WISHED THAT I COULD MOVE AWAY FROM MY SHITTY TOWN TO A WARM PLACE AND GUESS WHAT THIS JULY IM MOVING TO NORTH CAROLINA OKAY GUYS IM NOT MAKING THIS UP I AM SO CONFUSED ACTUALLY THIS IS GREAT BYE

Please please please

THAT DOG JUMPED A FUCKING CAR I NEED HIM!!!

I’m never going to stop reblogging this

reasons why i love german shepherds 

is there a term for cockblock when two ppl with vaginas are involved??

clitoris prohibitus

Sounds like a fucking spell from harry potter

i need to be like 12x hotter than i am now

0x12=0

I have to remind myself that the curse words I seem to accumulate from tumblr aren’t exactly the things to be saying out loud because today I was making some lil old lady’s latte and i dropped her cup and it was really hot and it splashed on my leg and I immediately went “suck my entire asshole” and that poor elderly woman gave me the most horrified look I have seen a human being give me

HOW DO PPL JUST GET CONTINUOUS ANONS THROUGHOUT THE DAY I DON’T UNDERSTAND IS THERE SOME KIND OF TUTORIAL OR CHEAT CODE THAT I DON’T KNOW

Church is weird

if there was a christian side of tumblr this is what their text posts would look like

The life of a pet owner: “What are you eating? OH GOD WHAT ARE YOU EATING???”

"Come back here with whatever you’re eating!"

"Don’t think you can fool me by stopping chewing. I know you’re still eating it!"

"Open your mouth. OPEN. YOUR. MOUTH."

The best part is that all of these can be seen as the owner’s perspective or the pet’s and it’s all still accurate.

my parents and i go way back