ornaments of rhyme

one time a girl at a teambuilding event sprained her ankle while drunk and she was still having fun but i (also very drunk) kept handing her glasses of water to help because i didnt want her to be hungover too

I would like to clarify this is not a “which type of pet owner are you” post. There is no choosing. Pet owners are both of these, all the time, forever. It’s a matter of which one is the conversation topic of the day, and the outcome depends entirely upon how recently their pet tried to eat plastic

I would also like to offer up the third alternative: “Socks is on double secret baby probation now and she’s gated in the living room because she wont stop sneaking out and trying to eat all the towels in the house. Please let me show you photos of this bastard idiot child because she’s SO FREAKING CUTE.”

“This is my pet furry asshole, he’s the stupidest fucker in the history of domesticated lifeforms and I love him so much, here look at pictures of him killing and eating the Christmas tree, trying to crawl into the box my computer keyboard came in, and summoning demons in the Chattering Language of Greater Oblivion to curse the birds in the backyard. Look at his toe beans!”

Kink scene rescheduled because halfway through me explaining the scenario my dom asked a clarifying question that uncovered a howling logical inconsistency and we ended up spending the next three hours workshopping the worldbuilding.

stuck in a creative rut when i wish i was creatively rutting!! or something. whatever. puts my hands in my pockets and walks away slumped

I would like to clarify this is not a “which type of pet owner are you” post. There is no choosing. Pet owners are both of these, all the time, forever. It’s a matter of which one is the conversation topic of the day, and the outcome depends entirely upon how recently their pet tried to eat plastic

I would also like to offer up the third alternative: “Socks is on double secret baby probation now and she’s gated in the living room because she wont stop sneaking out and trying to eat all the towels in the house. Please let me show you photos of this bastard idiot child because she’s SO FREAKING CUTE.”

“This is my pet furry asshole, he’s the stupidest fucker in the history of domesticated lifeforms and I love him so much, here look at pictures of him killing and eating the Christmas tree, trying to crawl into the box my computer keyboard came in, and summoning demons in the Chattering Language of Greater Oblivion to curse the birds in the backyard. Look at his toe beans!”

I feel bad for people who’ve never experienced a corn maze bc it’s not even fun but you just have to do it

my safe clothing items that I wear day in day out for years and years should never break or rip or wear down. the power of friendship should stop that kind of thing

I DIDNT CHECK TH E SONG FULLY BEFORE POSTING THIS I FUCKED UP

World Heritage Post

the grim reality for a lot of nonbinary people is that their options are closet themselves and be perpetually misunderstood by the world at large or be out and proud and be perpetually misunderstood by the world at large