codename: Stasis

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HAPPY PRIDE MONTH!

IT HAS BEEN THREE YEARS of codename:Stasis! CAN YOU BELIEVE IT?? And I am at 178,000+ WORDS!!! WHOA!

IMPORTANT! Please read my short story from OCTOBER 15TH 2025 before this!

Late? Yes. Never? NEVER! This started out as a short story, actually, but I loved it too much and it got very complicated VERY quickly.. which is why it's late! It just kept growing and I wanted to give it my everything.. so it took longer!

THE PART ABOUT Los Angeles, feeling unwelcome from the outside then feeling so safe from the inside, that actually happened to me ^_^ I used to detest LA until then.. now I have a certain respect for it, a love for it.. just not the traffic.. lol

I've seen Calista in my mind before but it wasn't until way later in the story.. and I LOVE her.. but this came up and I was like OMG I LOVE IT. Now you can read it :P

I AM SO HAPPY ABOUT THIS PIECE.

IMPORTANT pt 2: I WILL BE FINE TUNING THIS PIECE IN THE FUTURE BUT RIGHT NOW BETWEEN REGULAR CHAOS AND CALIFORNIA VOTER PROCRASTINATION CHAOS, MY BRAIN IS SCRAMBLED.

Songs used: Blink 182, "Los Angeles"

I wrote my short story about disability today as I am going through some shit that is disability related and these insults and attacks were screaming in the back of my mind.. so I incorporated them as a way to vent:

-“you don’t look disabled” -“I’ve seen people much worse off than you” -“we get it better than anyone so you don’t have to keep bringing it up;” (I’d only “brought it up” because of the constant barrage of nasty and/or dismissive comments) -“don’t compare yourself to him,” (said by my mother in law when my husband's back was turned) -“welfare muncher” -I am “an emotional trainwreck” and my husband “could do better”

He's not doing well.. y'all.. we're worried.

This is why the short story is so late today.

I love LiveJournal but it's been very difficult to post there and now the whole site won't load half the time. I am SAD AF to let it go, but there are better places to post.

⭐️ NOTE: MY LIVEJOURNAL ENTRY AND ART POSTS WILL BE LATE TODAY, as the formatting & art is WONKY and complicated =/ you can still read it on WordPress, WattPad and RoyalRoad ^_^

⭐️ When I first learned about the Japanese "Internment" camps, it was way too late in my life, early 20's to be exact. My southern schools didn't teach that part of American history (nor did they teach about the absolutely abhorrent Civil War, of course). I was talking about it to an immediate family member of mine. This family member then sent me links to historical records, telling me to pay close attention to what "the Japanese were doing to the Chinese" around that time.. as if the actions of Japanese military members in other parts of the world justified shoving Japanese-American civilians into prisons for nothing more than merely existing. This is what we're up against, people. This bullshit is what we must stand strongly against.

⭐️ I have actually been terrified that ICE will reopen Hells such as Manzanar which is what led me to write this (and the short story "Bennets and the Manzanar Plan")

⭐️ I had to get the San Diego Central Library in here, of course!

⭐️ And a shout out to the one named Sailor Moon! ;P

⭐️ ANNND BUCKLE UP! It's about to get a LOT MORE MAGICKY UP IN THIS BITCH! :D

⭐️ Art by @chiboozyl, as usual!

Today's short-story is actually some new I'm trying out:

Everything in this piece actually happened to me directly. I was the object of deflection, projection, false accusations, threats of violence, death threats, LGBT-hate, smear campaigns and this random, irrational flailing about book and movie facts (despite these facts being easily proven or disproven) for OVER A DECADE.. and I decided to put a teeeeeeeny lil smidge of that into a short story today because, what the hell, I'm feeling a bit petty.. and turning my trauma (and/or drama) into fantasy writing/petty story-time works for me :D y'all should try it sometime. Not naming any names but getting it all out there sure feels GREAT. This is the BULLSHIT that happens when you have MAGA narcissists in your lives. Get rid of it QUICK, y'all.

SO JILLIAN is actually VERY special to me; I believe she is my spirit guide! I've been seeing her for 26 years which was triggered when I heard T'Pau's Heart & Soul! I don't know why I call her Jillian, I used to call her "Tenshi" (which means 'angel' in Japanese) but I think I adopted the name Jillian when I first saw Practical Magic and wished that I had what Sally and Jillian have. There's so much more to this (including who I think she is in my life at this time) but I won't talk about it here ;P

I wanna do so much more (not digital) art with Jillian, Sol, Nina and Pan. <3

Like all of my characters, Jillian is STILL not completely developed :O but I am having SO MUCH FUN with her :)

I can't WAIT to reveal what and who the rest of the entities are! Can you figure out who Fate and Luck are? ;)

Just a tiny celebratory announcement; I HIT 150k+ WORDS GUYS!

See ALL ART (ok just most) ON DEVIANTART!

🎶Next month’s inspirational song🎶

I made this decision on New Years and did not know how to talk about it; several situations caused me to realize that capitalizing I's is not about selfishness, it's about valuing yourself.. and I decided to start doing so. I have finally started setting AND HOLDING boundaries with people who would/will not respect them or me, I'm doing tons of shadow work, and learning to love me regardless of outside influences.

I am still doing my shadow work and I am waking up. I have learned that for the past 10~ years I have been living on chronically high cortisol levels, that my nervous system is an absolute wreck, and I MUST correct this. I am proud of who and what I am becoming. Capitalizing my I's was a very interesting side effect of acknowledging and applying this. I have thought about going back and correcting the parts I've released with lowercased I's so far, maybe, but that's A LOT OF WORK so probably not.. and I'm ok with that.. not calling myself lazy or being mean to myself.. :)

I got behind then Jack (pupper) got sick-upset tummy-he's ok, but if he's not feeling better by tomorrow he's going to the vet. Poor guy.

This week's short story is published, though. If my tarot card understanding is wonky and weird, please forgive me as I'm still learning.

He passed away 8 years ago today. He was mine and Dnor's DM for Pathfinder (tabletop RPG) and the reason we met, he was also a player in other games. He was one of the kindest and most beautiful souls I've ever encountered. I believe he is part of my soul family and I believe I have seen him post-death in dreams; he's very happily chasing mermaids, ha! He used to roll 9's on D20's and get us in trouble allll the time, and yes, he even passed away on March effing 9th. People think it's morbid and rude to laugh at that but that's because I know he'd be laughing his ass off about it.

Dnor and my (chosen) sister help me write DJ. My sister knew him way longer than I did and Dnor has better memory of his mannerisms than me. You know, the little things like keeping a D20 from Nina's cleavage as good luck, lol.

I had a few ideas for this month's release but Neesi and Aisha's lives were the most relevant for the time; their early days in the US were covered in Lines (Issue #13) and Run (Issue#23). When they arrived in the US they were young, pregnant teenagers who had been sold into slavery to 1%-ers in the US. If you haven't read it, I urge you to before you read Breath Free. They were forced to obtain forged documents for a short time and only obtained legal documents because of Victoria's connections. The word "illegals" applied to people makes them unfathomably angry, especially on land obtained through r*pe, murder and genocide. They, like many who are helped by Vic and Tess, opted into "paying it forward." Also, they're fucking badasses. I began writing this part over a decade ago and I hope you all enjoy it.

Neesi and Aisha fought like hell and even killed for their freedom

they have awful survivor's guilt but they put their unborn children before everything

the word "illegals" is extremely offensive to them (as it should be)

I hope that this piece, when read, reminds people of the contributions of immigrants that we all benefit from and I hope it opens minds. Neesi, Aisha, Jet and Nhucha have done far more good for the US than "FROWA!"

Art by chiboozyl!

SO about the last 6 months to a year and why it's been absolutely chaotic;

I started doing shadow work and working on my boundaries HARD. People warned me; when you start establishing AND MAINTAINING YOUR BOUNDARIES people who benefited from you having none are going to have fits. I underestimated how bad it would get and that warning was 10,000,000% accurate BUT I'D DO IT AGAIN IN A HEARTBEAT. My life has been SO MUCH BETTER since letting these people go. It was worth it. And ya know something? Every single one of them were MAGA. My crime? Asking them to stop beating me over the head with their politics which was done repeatedly. When they refused to comply with this one VERY SIMPLE REQUEST, I walked away. Temper tantrums/incessant whining/insults and attacks commenced. In a single second I saw it all so clearly; deflection, projection, DARVO.. they accused me of every single thing they do and say.

Everything in my life changed so fast but for the best. After all that, I wouldn't let anyone else mistreat me anymore. This was "The Tower" for Dnor and I.. and now everything is better for both of us. No more subtle insults (on my birthday), no more shitty depressing holidays, no more gross (p3d0) politics being shoved down our throats, no more absurd accusations, homophobic/transphobic slurs being spat in my face about me and/or my friends, being told to get gr*ped or being terrified that someone's temper tantrums will actually end in me getting killed (which I was threatened with several times)--no seriously--this was actively and constantly going on when I backed away and when I backed away, Dnor and I were attacked and harassed for being unavailable to them.

In this time, my depression had spiraled out of control, my creativity tanked, I was having problems writing and didn't even want to make art at all. At ALL. I didn't even want to game. This is NOT me.

We are recovering now, both of us are doing so much better. The lesson.. DON'T LET PEOPLE ABUSE YOU NO MATTER WHO THEY ARE. Work on YOURSELF. If someone is actively abusing you, it's not YOU, it's THEM. If they have temper tantrums bc they can't control you, GOOD. KEEP GOING. I tried to make these people happy and all it did was destroy me.. DON'T let that happen to you, ok? OK??? I am SO GRATEFUL for every single one of my amazing friends who has been there for Dnor and I.. we wouldn't have survived without them. <3

Another Wednesday, another short-story. This one is.. special to me. Stay tuned to find out what happens next ;)

There’s a mass without roofs a prison to fill a country’s soul that reads post no bills a strike and a line of cops outside of tha mill there’s a right to obey and a right to kill