Homura's Blog

Been thinking of madosaya lately 🩵🩷

cosplaying my fav character and holding my fav pokemon :p

scene 0 is peak!!! i LOVE mabayu and homura dynamic theyre so freaking goofy.

They are both people whose's feelings and connections are unreciprocated and whose love changes them past the point of no return, over and over again.

They are those whose love scars them and brings them to change. Change until they're dead, executing themselves for what matters most to them.

They stand in eachother's way because the narrative requires them to, but they can never truly hurt eachother, they can't truly critcise eachother, because doing so would be deeply hypocritical.

They are cut from the same material, and while their forms clash like the contradictory body language of cats and dogs, they can't escape eachother. They can't break eachother.

They lose connection to themselves. Sayaka loses her humanity, unable to find common ground with anyone who isn't a magical girl too, she loses her ability to love herself. Homura loses her past, loses connection to the people she cares about and loves over and over again, becomes more and more distant as her feelings become too big, too vast, too deep for the people who don't know her but she loves.

They lose themselves, and still,

They are love. They are change. They are connection. They are the dying.

maybe the reason Homura never warns Sayaka isn't because she hates the girl

maybe the reason is because she knows it wouldn't have done anything to dissuade herself,

And putting the monkey paw wish aside, I honestly need a scene with the same ideas from Madoka when she gets her memories back in the new movie.

Madoka arc needs a moment when the world stops, she realizes the weight of her decisions, and just breaks down piece by piece. Homura’s burden is one of sacrificial of the self for another, human to human, Madokas one is the burden of sacrifice of the self to the world, human to reality. A reality that she left behind in order to become the change, becoming in the metaphorical and literal way. But turns out that’s a heavy burden, and not without her flaws.

She’s not only neglected Homura through leaving her as a loophole in the wish, but her own existence as well, and if the flower field scene told us anything, is that at least her subconscious mind acknowledges this side of her life as the Law of Cycles. Acknowledges that the sacrifice of the self, even for the world, comes at expense of someone, it may be you, it may be people you love, but sacrifice, even for the greater good, comes at a price, and not a meaningless one.

So when the time comes, and it will come, I hope Madoka could cry it out to someone. And even with tears dropping in a fake world and the burden of her decision on her back, she still takes the same choose over and over again, because that’s just who she is. A naive kind girl who feels like she has nothing to offer to the world more than her kindness, and if she has to erase herself to do the deed, so it be.