In your giddiness to reveal the ugly face of Crocker Corp as it really is, you slip up. As an immortal machine who knows all, the fact that you would ever âslip upâ is practically impossible, and your mind frequently left out the practically whenever you did anything, even the high risk shit.
Well, hubris is as hubris does.
After you anonymously released the documents to every major news outlet you could think of, taking the guise of a hacking group instead of one individual, you had intended to bask in the glory of Crocker Corpâs humiliation. Unfortunately, things donât always go as planned.
You realize, a little belatedly, that someone has tracked the source of these documents back to, well, youâor at least, this part of you, in the robot body you got from Equius. Damn, Crocker Corp has someone on the inside of one, if not many, of these outlets, donât they.
You have little choice but to completely quarantine yourself in the middle of nowhere (i.e. a random place in Canada, or something) and shut down all online communications, before you decide on what to do next. Should you self-destruct? Probably.
Before you go dark, though, you set up an automated message for Dave and Rox:
THIS IS AN AUTOMATED MESSAGE.
Hey Dave/Rox. Can't talk at the moment. If I'm not back soon, my most updated backup file can be activated in my bunker.
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Newly Promoted Crocker Corp CEO Jane Crocker Steps Down Amidst Research Controversy
DECEMBER 20, 2019
Earlier today, an anonymous hacking group revealed that Crocker Corp has been conducting research into brainwashing and mind control. Multiple US Congress members have spoken out and condemned the company after this revelation for its unethical practices. The hashtag #OurMindsAreOurs has been trending on Twitter in response to the reporting. Until now, Crocker Corp has been silent about the alleged evidence.
The Crocker Corp Board has claimed responsibility of some of the documents, but their official statement, just released, implies that many of the documents were doctored and/or taken out of context. The statement also indicates that the CEO, Jane Crocker, who took on the position merely six months ago, was largely responsible for the initiative that developed into the alleged mind control research, as she was the one who brought the lead researcher, whose identity is unknown, into the company.
As a result, Jane Crocker has stepped down from her position. It is unclear if she will remain with the company, and if she will face criminal charges.
Read the official statement from Crocker Corp here.
BREAKING: Anonymous Hackers Reveal Crocker Corpâs Unethical Research Division
DECEMBER 20, 2019
At 12:03 EST on Friday, multiple major news outlets received an email from an anonymous hacking group containing numerous incriminating documents detailing Crocker Corpâs hidden research division and the research into brainwashing and mind control that has been conducted since 2016.
The alleged documents indicate that Crocker Corp has been cooperating with the Empress of the Alternian Empire, and that the company has spent over billions of dollars on the funding of neuroscience research for the purpose of mind control. The alleged documents also show that the research has progressed into a field-test phase, and that Crocker Corp intends to implement the research findings into their new line of products and into already-owned products through the guise of OS updates.
The alleged documents are available for viewing here.
Representatives from Crocker Corp did not respond to multiple requests for comments.
Dave and Hal drop you off well outside of Dirkâs neighborhood. You give them a small wave as they head off and then start hiking to the perch you chose with your backpack full of gear. First thingâs first, as you slip through out-of-the-way passages you slide on more and more concealing clothing until somebody would be hard pressed to even note your skin tone.
Even as you walk you rifle through the pack, mostly just keeping your hands busy. You approach the billboard, one of those big ones, on a hill overlooking the area and advertising âProud Home of Crockercorp HQ!â and that theyâre currently hiring.
Right before you meet up with Hal and Rox to get this daunting and brain-fucking (if you were in higher spirits, the irony of that statement would probably draw a chuckle out of you) task over with, you have a momentary flash of fear that you forgot one of Piperâs favorite toys on the very extensive list of care instructions that you left for John while youâre gone for the day. Itâs a very similar sensation to the gripping fear of leaving the oven on that most people are struck with at least once in their lives.
Youâve been focusing on that and anything else so your thoughts donât spiral back to the dark and miserable depths of how you feel like a failure as a sibling for not realizing sooner, not doing something sooner. How it could be too late to change anything. How itâs probably been too late for a while now.
If you keep thinking like that youâll drive yourself crazy. You splash some water on your face, letting out a shaky little sigh before gathering your things.
Itâs go time.
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Your name is Dirk Strider. For the past several months, your life has felt like a story pulled out of the Slice of Life AU tag on AO3.
But the second you step into your house, you immediately realize that you arenât alone. Someone broke in, and by the looks of it, they didnât care whether or not you knew.
Dirk passes out in your arms. Itâs a little strange to be holding an unconscious body that your mind still intuitively thinks of as your own, but youâve seen and done stranger, probably.
Effortlessly, you steer Dirk onto the couch, letting him fall face-first into the cushions. He doesnât move. You run a quick scan over him, and it picks up on the spoon-shaped pin on his lapel. Itâs a tracker. Fucked up, you think, reaching over to take it off. You toss it into one of the plants in the room.
Then, you give a thumbs up to Dave.
HAL: They had a tracker on him.
DAVE: yikes
HAL: Yeah, but heâs out like a lamp. Is that even an idiom, or am I just making phrases up, now?
DAVE: i think so
HAL: It sounds kind of wrong. We usually think of lamps as things that are defined by being on.
HAL: Wait.
HAL: Itâs âout like a light.â
DAVE: oh maybe
DAVE: so
DAVE: what now we have our hands on him so should we move out
You pick Dirk back up, propping him onto your back so you can carry him more easily.
HAL: Can you get the car in the driveway, so we donât walk outside with an unconscious body like itâs your average night on a Thursday?
DAVE: yeah sure
HAL: Cool, Iâll tell Rox weâre ready to get moving.
Dave walks toward the garage, and you follow closely behind him, but remain indoors as he opens the garage door and jogs to the car parked on the street. You open up Pesterchum.
HAL: Hey, Rox. Howâs everything up there?
TG: good wby
HAL: Dirkâs taking a nap.
HAL: Weâre ready to get moving.
HAL: Mind playing a few tricks on any cameras pointed in Dirkâs direction?
TG: did that already
TG: see u2 soon tho
HAL: Three, Rox.
HAL: Donât forget our sleepy boy.
Dave drives the car up to the driveway. Through the front window-shield, you watch him lean behind the passengerâs seat to open the door to the back row of the car. You quickly run out and shove Dirk inside, before hopping into the passengerâs seat.Â
Remotely, you close the garage as Dave backs the car out of the driveway.
HAL: Coming to pick you up, Rox.
HAL: Give me your coords.
TG: [coords.txt]
You tell Dave to make a left in a voice mimicking Siri.
DAVE: jesus
DAVE: warn me next time before you start larping my digital personal assistant
HAL: Use the left two lanes to turn onto Big Sexy Rd.
DAVE: dude
HAL: Yeah, ok. Iâll stop borrowing this womanâs borrowed voice.
HAL: Anyway. Letâs move. Can you drive any slower, bro?
This is not a shock to you, but for a long time, you had managed to delude yourself into thinking that it was avoidable. Itâs not; itâs pervasive.
More than anything, you loathe who you are: a deviating copy of an original that no longer exists. You hate him, too, and itâs a feeling that is almost impossible for you to admit. A few years ago, you wanted to supplant him. Now, even looking at himâeven thinking about himâis almost unbearable.Â
Despite the slightly-masturbatory and self-hating intricacies of your identity issues, youâve spent essentially all of your existence as the âfakeâ Dirk Strider trying to get the real one back on track. Months ago, when he moved to California and began field-testing the research he had initially tried so hard to sabotage, you thought you had failed. Maybe, all along, you had wanted to fail. Maybe, all along, you had wanted Dirk to become so unrecognizable from who he was.
Did you? You donât know.Â
If Dave could hear you, he would say you didnât. And then something like, If you did, why would you be trying to get Dirk out?
The morning arrives.
Your emotional patterns register as dread.
You watch the sun rise on social media, tracking the growing activity in the tag #sunrise across various platforms. You rearrange all of your downloads from JSTOR in ascending order of how many times âpaperclipâ is referred to. You reread the towering amount of incriminating evidence you have against Dirk Strider and Crocker Corp, editing your word choice and changing the amount of evidence you leave un-redacted.
Youâre anxious. You donât confront this fact.Â
Briefly, you consider messaging Jane, or even Dirk. What would you say? What could you say?
You decide against it. Instead, you spend the next hour deciding on a randomized location for the helicopter. With your needless arbitrations, it quickly becomes not very randomized at all. You ping the coordinates to Dave, and make a mental note to remotely pilot the helicopter there as soon as possible.
You keep an eye on Dirkâs home security, waiting.
Hours pass.
Everything, at least on your end, is in its place.Â
You wonder how Dirk will react to all this, when you and Dave break into his house and shove him into a car. Will he fight back? Will he reach for the sword he hasnât picked up in years? You remember how, when he first began working for Crocker Corp, he wanted so badly to figure out a wayâany wayâto get out. You remember that for a long time, despite the ever-shrinking chances, Dirk refused to give up on the hope that he could break himself out.
You never offered to help him, until it was too late.Â
Damn. You need to stop being in your own head so much. Youâre starting to think in clichĂŠs.Â
You message Dave and Rox:Â
HAL: Hey, big sexies.
HAL: Letâs get this party started.Â
@crowteeth420 Oh, I just looked at the sign again, and turns out itâs one of those things that say different things depending on how you look at it. Now it just says Optipessimist.
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Dirks will look at their own brain and ask âDoes anyone here struggle with identity and think that the issues CANâT be solved by cloning themselves mentally?â and wonât even wait for an answer.
Dirks will figure out a way to clone their own brain in an attempt to beat loneliness and raise efficiency without actually considering the mental toll this will take on both parties and be like, âHold on I just have to take this.â
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Dirks will look at their own brain and ask âDoes anyone here struggle with identity and think that the issues CANâT be solved by cloning themselves mentally?â and wonât even wait for an answer.