re: your post that weight gain is an unlimited content glitch for hr
yes. and now i am replying scenes in my brain through a fat lens. the tuna meltdown is the first time ilya prepares food for shane. ilya feeds him, maybe even overfeeds him. shane’s inner freak is so turned on but his inner avoidant is terrified.
yummy and angsty to think of shane still running away in this situation, or maybe ilya is able to keep him too stuffed to run away from his feelings lol choose your own adventure
ohh my god YES… picturing shane finished his sandwich and ilya’s like “you like it?” and shane’s like “uhh yeah, it’s good,” and ilya nods and gets up from the sofa, and shane hears him rustle around in the kitchen for a moment, and then he’s back sitting closer to shane and holding out a plate with another sandwich expectantly. “oh,” shane says awkwardly. “no, i didn’t mean—i mean, it’s good and all, thanks, but i’m full.” and ilya just stares at him steadily and says, “eat, hollander. is good for you.” and shane’s cheeks get a little hot, and what the hell, the sandwich was pretty damn good, so he picks up another half from ilya’s plate and takes a bite. ilya’s eyes are completely locked on shane as he eats the sandwich. and its weird, of course it’s weird, but it’s also stirring something in shane that he can’t name. he keeps eating until his stomach is starting to protest a little bit, then leaves the last bit of crust and cheese on the plate and swipes his hands on his shirt. he’s about to say something—another thank you or a comment about the buffalo game that’s still playing on the tv in front of them—but when he opens his mouth, ilya calmly picks up the remaining bit of sandwich and places it on shane’s tongue.
shane’s gaze flicks immediately to rozanov’s, expecting to see something teasing, some levity or smugness in his eyes. but there isn’t. there’s only a quiet intensity, the heat behind it steady as a radiator. without meaning to, shane parts his mouth a little wider. he can taste rozanov’s fingers, skin and salt, the smooth line of nail, and rozanov presses the sandwich in deeper before withdrawing his fingers in a slow, easy drag. shane chews mechanically, bread mashing between his teeth, and swallows. rozanov’s hand is on his jaw. rozanov’s eyes are hearth-bright and his thumb is brushing a crumb from the corner of shane’s lips into the open part of his mouth, lingering on his lower lip. “good,” ilya says simply. approvingly. pleased.
but something in shane’s gut is turning over, something more than the overfull bolus of food. something that feels like panic, like putting your hand too close to the fire and only withdrawing when you’ve already been burned.
“i’m sorry,” he says, standing up so swiftly that the plate slips back to the floor with a crash. “i can’t—i can’t do this.”
“hollander,” ilya says, but shane’s already out the door.














