Your Lady of Mercy

I write smut and omegaverse, if you don't fuck with that this may not be the blog for you, all posts with either are tagged however

I've been getting a modicum, a crumb if you will, of attention, as such I write to my innumerable adoring fans in an official capacity to decree this.

Should my words ever speak to you, touch something within your soul, and inspire you to write, know that any of my fic prompts are given freely into the arms of this hellsite like rehabilitated crocs to a river in a Florida wildlife centre. Metaphorical lambs to the slaughter, they can be done with as any see fit to do unto them.

All this to say, if anyone ever wants to write any of the prompts out and give them substance I'd be more than thrilled to see it and please give me a tag if you do (ps: my a03 and Tumblr are the same user)

Send me asks, I don't bite (much)

(Pretty much anything is fair game but I reserve the right to refuse lol, my DMs are also open)

If anyone wonders where I got my new totally bitchin text dividers from, check out @uzmacchiato and @cursed-carmine

Shane is leant against the front door, stomach tensing and untensing in glistning ripples as his fingers scramble at the glass behind him. He shakes his head back and forth, eyes screwed up as sweat damp hair falls over his forehead and brushes at the dark, dark freckles om his cheeks, brought out by hours in the beating sun. He can feel sweat drip down his nape and front, running tracks down his exposed chest.

Ilya with one hand rucking up Shane's shirt to watch it drip down under the scrunched waistband of his husband's shorts; mouth dry and panting hot against the sparse black hair of his happy trail only just holding himself back from cleaning it up with his tongue. But Shane hasn't given him permission yet so he stays where he is and stares with hazy eyes, begging for it.

Ok but imagine an awards ceremony sometime after they are married, at this point Shane had topped maybe a couple of times and it was always verry vanilla. But this one night, hes a little drunk, high off of one of his best award ceremony sweeps, and painfully horny. I'm talking like tie lost, shirt buttons undone obscenly low. He's watching his husband who looks so pretty dolled up and smiling for the cameras, and for once he realises he isnt looking at Ilya because he wants to be fucked but because he needs to fuck him.

I think Shane gets kinda sleazy with it, alcohol loosning his mouth, hes digging his fingers into Ilyas hips and grinding his cock against his ass with his face buried in his husbands neck, whispering filth about how tight Ilya always is. I solemly believe the erection this would give Ilya would kill him off via rapid blood relocation but I digress.

Just the image of Ilya sprawled over the fancy hotel bed, naked but for his jewlery being fucked hard within an inch of his life by Shane. A Shane who didn't even bother getting undressed himself and just unzipped his slacks so he can fuck his husband, panting little "take it, take it, take it" between Ilya's punched out moans and screaming.🎀

Not to mention, I think Irina was the ultimate boy mom about Ilya, in her depression and that he was in her eyes the one good thing in her life, and I do think she projected her own feelings onto him. Not in an incest-y way at all, but he was her "little man" and she was possessive over him. I don't think she liked it when Ilya talked about liking girls at school, because he was hers and not old enough for any of that yet. He probably became her caretaker when she was in the midst of her depressive episodes, like fetching her water and food and trying to convince her to get up and shower or lying down with her when that doesn't work. Alexei probably watched all this, and saw Ilya missing school when she was really bad and it made him resent her more, because how is it that he is getting almost no attention from her and she is smothering Ilya to the point of it being detrimental to him.

Controversially I do think it was selfish of her to commit suicide in a way that almost guarenteed one of her children would find her, depression and suicidal thoughts are hard to deal with, but she left Ilya with memories of one of the most traumatic things a child could experience when she had other options. I also agree when other people say that she was probably a very conservative woman who would not have approved of Ilya's bisexuality, and especially not Shane. I think it boils down to the fact that Ilya was so manipulated by her and the people around him, with her pitting him against Alexei especially that he has put her on this pedestal in his head because if he doesn't then he has to actually examine what his childhood was like and see her as a real woman with real flaws when she is the one tangible thing he has to hold on to from his childhood as "good".

I aware this is word vomit but I really think their is more to Ilya's relationship with Alexei than the show or book dives into. No one is born an asshole and Alexei definitely had just as shitty a childhood is Ilya's. And you bet your ass Ilya gets almost agressively defensive over the memory of her if anyone around him questions her actions. In my personal opinion the biggest fight, that almost ends their relationship between Shane and Ilya is when Shane questions whether Irina was fair to Ilya and expresses sympathy for Alexei and Grigori about her suicide. Ilya just point blank refuses to see Shane's point, and accuses him of siding with his brother and father. Idk people, just give me toxic boy mom co-dependant with her 12 year old, conservative and emotionally manipulative Irina who was a real and complex person but in the end just as detrimental to Ilya's mental health as his father.

Codependent Hollanov genuinly runs rampant in my brain. I need them struggling to spend even 2 hours apart post tlg, no longer having single ownership over clothes and personal belongings. I know in my heart and soul that Shane would hold it whilst Ilya pees. Just in the morning koala-ed to his back and not ready to give up full body contact yet. Casual nudity is a thing for them. Ilya crawls under the clothes Shane is wearing when they're cuddling. They will be lounged next to eachother on the sofa and Shane will just be threading his fingers through Ilya's happy trail and further down, wrapping his hand around his husbands dick just to feel the weight and warmth of it in his hand; and its all non-sexual. They are effectively mutually free-use, they don't call it that but they just see eachothers bodies as an extension of their own. They are either showering together or one stands outside the glass whilst the other showers. They're one of those couples that has to be actually intertwined with eachother in non euclidian geometries to sleep. They go to eachothers appointments, if one of them can't attend neither of them can attend. Their time apart each month is measured in hours. They are the couple ever. Their friends are staging interventions amd getting concerned. They do not care. They keep inflicting their PDA on them anyway.

I'm sorry but you cant tell me that someday after Shane and Ilya retired and they've adopted a couple kids, Ilya doesn't find himself laid out on their sofa, Shane asleep and curled into his side with their toddlers snuggled on top of him and a very grey Anya laid on his feet; and just starts sobbing. Like that's his family right there and actually this random tuesday afternoon might be the happiest he's ever been in his whole life. Like that's actually his whole world on the sofa with him and maybe it was all worth it in the end if he gets to have this.🎀