Face the fear, build the future.

...None of us really miss the times when their cities were populated. Imagine having skin parasites that also ask for advice and have opinions...

I'm sorry, that was disrespectful. They were our parents after all.

- Pale Green Exterior Pearl

I've seen some people take her "skin parasites" comment as uncharacteristic and unfounded hatred instead of something extremely telling about how her "parents" have treated and conditioned her. The use of "parents" is very purposeful here, I feel. Her immediate retraction and apology evoke the image of a daughter who had a poor relationship / was mistreated by her parents and is left with conflicting and complicated emotions she can't process. She resents them, but she also feels indebted to them, and perhaps her acknowledgement of them as "parents" may imply affection, as well. Regardless, since she cannot process these emotions (and feels it is wrong of her to hold them to begin with), she represses them. She retracts her comment and apologizes for being disrespectful.

That's probably all she's ever known how to do. All she's ever been allowed to do. Moon seems very conscientious about behaving "politely." Don't get me wrong, Moon clearly values kindness and hope; those are core to her character. She doesn't like being angry, and it doesn't usually benefit her or help anyone.

...It's useless to be angry at an animal following its instincts. Once, a single neuron meant nothing to me...

...I'm still angry at you, but it is good to have someone to talk to after all this time. The scavengers aren't exactly good listeners. They do bring me things though, occasionally...

- Returning to LTTM who has 4 Neurons left

She displays emotional maturity here by acknowledging and communicating her anger whilst not letting it cloud her judgment. Instead of holding things against the slugcat, she continues talking to them, because she understands that staying mad at them won't help anybody.

I don't think being angrier would help her, and her willingness to forgive and let go of it is a strength. But I believe her emotional repression takes that maturity and strength of character and creates something a little more complicated — a woman who struggles to fully process her negative emotions, especially surrounding people and concepts she is meant to respect. Her core values ride the line between virtue and vice (being willing to forgive and caring for others vs being too passive and repressing her own needs), and her actions are layered and nuanced, just like a real person.

This isn't to say she is against expressions of anger or negative emotions wholesale.

...I could read a bit of Five Pebbles in this neuron before formatting it. His condition has severely deteriorated since last I heard of him. The frustration he feels is profound, and that angst has seeped into every part of him, every neuron.I could read a bit of Five Pebbles in this neuron before formatting it. His condition has severely deteriorated since last I heard of him. The frustration he feels is profound, and that angst has seeped into every part of him, every neuron.

We were supposed to help everyone, you know. Everything. That was our purpose: a great gift to the lesser beings of the world. When facing our inability to do so, we all reacted differently. Many with madness...

even back when we were all more or less connected there were those who reacted to their task with anger. I can only imagine they are angrier now, alone in their cans, left only with their insatiable drive.

- bringing one of FP's neurons to LTTM

She empathizes with the frustration that FP feels in a very literal sense; she's processing his emotions from the neuron. She doesn't judge or rebuke him for this; rather, she explains why he might be frustrated, and that he is likely not alone in feeling this way.

So, it's fine when others express that anger. Just not for Moon. Ironically, the fandom sometimes reinforces this. Moon can get mad at you and refuse to speak to you if you treat her in ways she doesn't want to be treated. (setting and enforcing boundaries) I've seen (some) people say she's being mean or unreasonable here. You're not trying to hurt her, and your actions are quite tame. But these actions cause Moon great distress and make her feel disregarded. Holding her neurons likely inhibits their function, jumping around likely overstimulates her, and interrupting her while she's speaking to you is just plain rude.

But some people still seem shocked by this; they're not used to NPCs setting boundaries with them like they're actual people. And Moon is usually very nice to you! So when she enforces these boundaries, some people get frustrated and confused.

...This ties into the parentification of LTTM, a phenomenon that greatly upsets me.

People expect her to be unconditionally and endlessly loving and patient and supportive, and then when she acts like a normal human being, they get mad. Because they expect her to be their mom.

And yes, she is very caring, supportive, and patient! She's also eloquent and enthusiastic, emotionally repressed, hopeful and kind, someone who struggles to assert herself, someone who enjoys sharing knowledge with others, someone who's careful about the way she conducts herself, someone who speaks fondly of sky-sails in flight during big festivals, etc...

She's very caring towards others. Like a Big Sister. She is Big Sister-coded. Her name is Broadcasts is Big Sis / Big Sister Moon. It could not be more obvious, and yet some people force her into the role of "mother" because on an unconscious level, they can only conceive of women as mothers and wives.

Perhaps that is too biting, but I believe it is true. It does not help that her Counterpart (Five Pebbles) is often infantilized in tandem, but that is a conversation for another time. I should also specify that forcing / expecting eldest daughters to take on a motherly role is a phenomenon widespread across various cultures and not something exclusive to the Rain World Fandom. ((it's a widespread societal issue!))

Regardless, this view of Moon as a mother plays into this idea that she must be unfailingly kind, unconditionally patient, and unfathomably supportive. Moon likely even expects these things of herself. The expectations of a Big Sister are not so different, after all.

And she is trying very, very hard. She is exhausted and irritable, she hardly functions, and she has very few resources to help her. Don't get me wrong, I do think she is an exceptionally kind person, but that is because she wants to be. Her kindness is not the default; it is not owed to you or to be expected of everyone you meet. Looks To The Moon remains kind and hopeful because she is fighting every moment of her life for it to be so.

Unfortunately, her efforts often go unacknowledged and her radical empathy (influenced by her unique circumstances) taken for granted.

People often focus on how it feels to be someone's "Little Brother", to live in their shadow...

But what about how Moon feels? What about the struggles of being responsible for another person? Of being an example for them and held to higher standards? Of unfailingly devoting your support to them? How she struggled to assert herself, to go against her sibling... How she may feel guilt over both her inaction and her subsequent action... Maybe she should've acted sooner. Maybe she shouldn't have acted at all. Maybe, if she had just been a better Big Sister, none of this would've happened to begin with.

We don't really know how she feels about all that, though. (She probably doesn't, either, haha) It's all just speculation at the end of the day. And I don't want to make it seem like her "Big Sister" role is an entirely negative or oppressive thing. Again, she is kind! She likes teaching others! She's very understanding and caring, and she has a lot of patience and maturity! I just think it's fun to point out these subtler details.

I think viewing Moon as someone who has been socialized as a woman and as a big sister specifically gives a lot of meaningful insight into her character. And it's not something I see discussed a ton in general.

Other Notes I didn't know where to put:

Eldest Daughter Syndrome I cannot re-iterate this enough

I feel like sometimes people make moon assertive or more aggressive to compensate for her suffering. Like, because she's FP Local Group Senior, she has to be authoritative. I think these people focus too much on the "Big" and not enough on the "Sister" aspect. Moon isn't a girlboss, and that's okay! It's okay for her to struggle with things. (But, being fair, you're not hurting anyone by doing this, so do what makes you happy etc etc. I just think it can potentially come from a place of devaluing "weakness" often associated with traditionally feminine traits, and it's good to examine that.)

Furthering the aggression point, I think some people see that Five Pebbles hurt her and think that there needs to be some sort of retribution. That Moon should hate him, resent him, and want to hurt him back. But I feel like forgiveness makes much more sense for Rain World. Moon isn't being unrealistically kind or too much of a pushover by forgiving Pebbles and not holding resentment towards him; she's at peace. She doesn't want to hurt him or hate him, and doing so wouldn't bring her any catharsis. (And he doesn't want to hurt her, either! i could make an entirely different ramble about why I think the Vanilla siblings could and should reconcile but I'll save that for another time ig) uhhhh this isn't entirely gendered something something Care Ethics

LTTM and FP serve as foils in a lot of ways. I think there is an enlightening conversation to be had about how FP explores / presents traditionally masculine traits or a masculine socialization.

The bennies / ancients / whatever seem to place a lot of importance on Obligations. I think Roles were probably important to them. Being a Big Sister likely had a lot of Obligations that came with it.

I get that LTTM and FP are not like explicitly specifically siblings in Vanilla. I do think it is implied, though. They have a unique physical connection and live in very close proximity to one another. There's no flashing "THESE TWO ARE SIBLINGS!!" sign, but the subtext is there, and I prefer to interpret them as such. alternative readings could instead be "all local group iterators are related" or "none of these people are related". do what you want ig

Was any of this even intentional? I'm probably reading a liiiittle too much into things, but I do think this was intentional. She's "Big Sister Moon" in the broadcasts. She could've just had her normal name, but they decided to make her "Big Sister Moon." Vanilla is subtle and largely up to interpretation, but it is very purposeful, I feel. I don't think they named her BSM just for fun, lol. (But maybe I'm wrong!)

I do not want to undermine FP's struggles and equally fascinating character-writing here. There's a whole host of issues I have with how people see FP, but I feel like many people have spoken about this at-length, and most are aware of the common complaints that tend to arise. With LTTM, I feel like people generally really like her, but they don't appreciate / talk about the finer nuances of her character as much. People like her because she's really nice, but there's more to her than that. ((also because it's fun to talk about that's kinda the main reason I made this))

I do actually have some thoughts about DP canon and the relationship between LTTM and FP and her role as Big Sister within that canon ((like how people misinterpret FP's construction as being for LTTM rather than primarily to serve her Citizens with LTTM being alleviated as a bonus)) but to be honest there's so much to read with DP that I don't really want to try and tackle it. Furthermore, DP canon will on multiple occasions either contradict itself or muddy the concepts it's trying to communicate and this makes it a lot harder to work with when it comes to interpretations and readings aha.

im just a random person on the internet so please don't take my word as gospel. feel free to disagree with me or provide your own insights, etc.