I'm here for the beans

Finally, a worthy competitor to this site's hate mail game.

funny story i know this guy who at the adventurous age of 12 and fruitfully in more ways than one tried sucking his own dick until he at a terminal moment got a sudden sharp and excruciating pain in his back that caused him to flop violently horizontal on his bed and conclude that he couldn't move. he then spent the next half an hour crying about his impending lifetime of quadraplegia and trying to concoct a plausible story for how he broke his back naked in bed and covered in cum. then i calmed down and realized i could in fact move

i mean he

no way dude no way. there's just no way

Me when I start transforming into a sim mid song before snapping out of it last second