i dont know a single goddamn thing

Why do ppl keep saying that they make a mean dish why's it gonna be mean why does every thing have to be evil 😔 so much hate in the world

i make a tender, caring roast chicken that'll kiss you so so much

I make a mac n cheese so good you could fuck it

8 hour shifts just don’t sit right with me. We can’t keep letting this happen people

can i get uhhhhhhhhhhh double sleep meal please, extra pillow and blanky on that. and a side of shuteye and rest. thanks

whose this

guy

woag. gay married

gabagool is meat????

literally thought it was just his catchphrase like the bazinga of sopranos

the novelty of having a pet will never wear off on me i’ve had animals my entire life for 23 entire years and i still sometimes stop and go holy fuck there is just a little guy in my house

pull HIS hair. get HIM pregnant

A seahorse wrote this

im gonna flatten you with a cartoonishly large anvil

maybe the girl in the car's boyfriend and the hook man simply ran away together. did you ever think of that.

the CDC's like "how could covid cases be RISING?! all we did was tell the dumbest, most selfish population in the history of the world that they didn't need masks if they got vaccinated, entirely on the honor system"

Apparently Tyler Oakley still exists?! Didn't realize. It's been a hot minuit since 2012. Cool news tho!

did you think i’d be dead or something

THE WEASARD

brunch is only available when breakfast and lunch kiss

would you guys like me more if i said they fuck instead