isopodlover3000

Iiii broke up with my girlfriend of five years yesterday. We had been together since the end of highschool and had been friends even longer. We were long distance and it was tough but even still I think for a while we had something truly beautiful. We built entire worlds with our characters and lore and writing because she was the only person I'd ever met who obsessed over that type of thing like I did. She introduced me to Ghost, a band that's so important to me.......we literally thought of ourselves as sister and nihil if you know you know. She came down to the US for my college graduation, and she organized a party for me. When my family was failing me she was always there for me. I loved her so much. I still do, and I hate that I had to make this decision.

Our communication just totally broke down in the end, and the worst part is I know it's not her fault, I know it was her mental health stuff, but it was hurting me over and over. And I couldn't keep spending days at work trying not to cry or frantically waiting for 5 pm so we could call and try to sort things out, especially when she would escalate problems where all that was needed was a simple "my bad I'm sorry". And it sucks knowing that I was shoving past all of my issues, my anxiety, my depressive moments, etc because I was determined to be good for her, and....she just couldn't do the same.