Firstly, let's start where I mentioned it first.

When the scope of the "Virago" label was first conceptualized, many were surprised by the inclusion of Feminine Virago. It was an identity that had rarely been articulated because the we put GNC4GNC attracted women at the forefront of discussion most of the time.

Simply, we often see gender-conforming women in queer relationships—such as feminine sapphics or femmes attracted exclusively to butch partners—having their femininity and womanhood directly questioned by society. The Virago label extends itself to this exact struggle for feminine women attracted to Explicitly Queer Feminine Men, capturing the experiences of women whose sexualities cause immense isolation and confusion. The isolation and confusion you have experienced regarding your sexuality is a sociological result of feeling isolated from how your presentation expects you to interact with the world.

Gender conforming women in queer relationships have their femininity and womanhood put into direct question. Primarily Feminine Sapphics, Femme4Butch, women soley attracted to GNC peoples etc. The nature of the label extends itself to that struggle, especially since awareness of your existence is essentially nonexistent.

As you've said, your sexuality has provided an amount of isolation and confusion. This is by design.

There's less thought placed into those solely attracted to Gender nonconformity, because in a Gynarchophobic/Cuphobic lens, presentations that aren't codified by the Euro-colonial, cis-heteropatriarchy, are essentialized into the closest archetype known. Under this system, gender-conforming women are strictly expected to desire gender-conforming men. Femininity is enforced as a woman’s "safe," default setting, to the point where womanhood and femininity are treated as entirely inseparable, interchangeable concepts. Consequently, when someone deviates from these expectations, society lacks the vocabulary to see them clearly: masculine women are dismissed as "faux-men," and feminine men are reduced to "faux-women." The systemic erasure and the social advantages it protects remain unmistakably present even within mainstream gay and queer contexts, due to the added privilege-by-recognizability that a gender-conforming existence appeases, and the lingering Cuphobic/Gynarchophobic forces of their own community that work against them.

Across the entire spectrum of sexuality, the mere notion of finding a gender-nonconforming person solely and exclusively attractive immediately threatens the validity of the gender-conformist's own social standing and perceived gender quality. An explicitly queerphobic prejudice that effects those of "deviant" sexuality.

This mechanism places Feminine Virago at tricky crossroads: The gender-conforming girl exclusively attracted to gender-nonconforming, feminine boys, both feminine. Within a rigid framework, the combination of two feminine figures in a romantic partnership reads as inexplicably queer, just as the presence of a gender-nonconforming person—and a partner's sole, unwavering attraction to them—is fundamentally disruptive to heteronormativity. This makes navigating the social world tricky, which is precisely why these women are apart of the label. Ultimately, within this specific layer of marginalization, there exists a deeply queer expression of femininity that belongs uniquely to them. one defined by the rejection of the rigid archetypes society attempts to force upon their desire.

Oh! Sorry, yeah, your question. The isolation you feel likely stemmed from the proximity your gender quality has to mainstraight women. What's adding is the scarcity of resources (hence your ask) within our community for women like you.