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@cgmyk

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this is the biggest plot twist of our generation
I thought there was no way he could come out of that looking like a winner and he proved me wrong so hard
tumblr is also like this

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I went on a double date with my sister (Jamie, 24) and her new boyfriend. (Paul 25ish) We went to an Italian place. Paul goes on about how the word is for red in Italian marinara, and the word for white is alfredo, so that’s how he remembers the sauce names. I told Paul I took Italian in high school, and it’s rosso and bianco. It even says so on the wine menu. Paul started yelling at me and calling me wrong. Those are the names for wines, not colors. My husband showed him on Google the translation for red and white. Paul told my sister he was leaving and called us stupid assholes and how wrong we were. Paul and my sister left without paying their bill, or even getting some food. When we asked the server he said the drinks are no problem and not to worry about it. My sister texted me later and said why do I think I always have to be right and I embarrassed Paul, and it was immature of my husband. She said we didn’t have to argue with him over something so silly. She said my husband, and I bullied him. She told me that I don’t have to say to people when they are wrong and embarrass them in public like that.
World heritage AITA (Am I The Asshole?) post.
This will never NOT be funny
I’m so glad this is on tumblr
My favourite thing about this is, he didn’t even have to call him ‘Captain’ he could have used the screen-name but he was SO MARRIED TO THE IMMERSION that he DID.
Passenger: CAPTAIIIIN!!!
Captain: y-yeah?
Passenger: LOOOOOOOK!
(FULL BLAST PIRATES OF THE CARRIBEAN MUSIC)
my fav.
Fun fact, the developers of this game loved this video so much that they made it an official advertisement of the game
help

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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Just ate an entire pear that was so good and so juicy i started gnawing on it with both hands like an animal and the face my supervisor made when he passed by my desk while I was absolutely consumed by my pear fueled bacchanal was Something i have never seen someone look so tired and also so upset and also also so envious
Had another pear today it was even JUICIER than the pear I had yesterday and had to eat over my trashcan so I didn't get juice all over myself and while I was hunched over lost in the sauce I heard the deepest sigh and when I looked up my supervisor was standing over me like
Called out in the company group chat
love wins actually
This works as an answer to the metaphorical problem because the key is for the hedgehogs and prcupines to be a bit flexible about how they position themselves and keep thier spines pointed in such a fashion to minimize poking, just like how in human relationships you have to be a bit flexible and concious of your position relative to others, and to manage your sharp bits to minimize the harm you do to others.
gotta remind myself that i’ve done enough watering for others. i’m the garden this time around.
This is the FUNNIEST SHIT I HAVE EVER SEEN
Reblogging for cultural enrichment
bout time I brought back the Laurel and Hardy flex tape-
I drink poison just because it doesnt hurt me and it makes you so mad

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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Cubone Pet Masks made by mcmaster3d