Just A Drunk Little Bird

It started with a sharp pain. It didn't feel like a monthly kind of pain, no, it was worse than that. A pressure that built up, plummeting down to your lower abdomen and earning a sharp gasp from you as you sat up. It wasn't a kick either, no, those were different too. Soft and subtle, just beneath the flesh. It wasn't a pain you were familiar with, so to try and settle back into bed felt out of the question.

Your time here on the Homestead had been nice, quiet and lately? Incredibly domestic. You'd gotten, what felt like, the fairy-tale story. The one every girl found herself dreaming about, a man that cared for you, loved you, would move trees and mountains for you, if he could. A lovely home that was large, empty and just lulling for you to give it life. A child, small footsteps running down each hall and large stairs. Falling in love with Ratonhnhaké:ton felt like a dream, how kind and gentle he had been with you during your years here. Your relationship blossomed quickly, starting with lingering stares and touches until he found himself at your door asking if you'd like to join him on a walk around the grounds. He was muscular, witty, sarcastic and kind in all the right ways and he didn't just fill you up with a kind of warmth that no other man in your life had done, he'd given you a home and now? A child.

With the pregnancy being your first, it had been a struggle to adjust to the many changes. Swelling ankles, dizzy spells, vomiting and breathlessness the bigger your stomach grew. Not just that, but the pregnancy had an impact on Ratonhnhaké:ton too. For a man with such a stoic nature, you felt the waves of anxiety roll off him whenever you did - well - anything. He would linger, hold the small of your back each time you took the stairs, follow you around like a lost puppy, ensured you ate, held your hair back whenever you spewed that food back up. He didn't complain, though it had gotten tiring with the endless questions of concern he would plague you with.

The pain subsided, just for a moment as you sat up and pushed the covers back to reveal the expanse of your incredibly large stomach. Each time you found yourself looking upon your bump, your hand would move instinctively to rub gently along the base of it. It felt strange to know that you were with child, carrying a small life within you, safe and snug in the confides of your belly. There was nothing that excited and scared you more than the idea of being a mother, there was no book that told you what to do, how to do it, you just gave birth and were expected to know the ins and outs of parenthood. Lyle had said something along the lines of 'this will all come natural,' but what would he know? He was a man after all. And as much as you loved being pregnant, it was tiring and frankly, you were counting down the days for it to be over.

Slowly, you glanced over at the sleeping bear beside you. It humoured you to compare Ratonhnhaké:ton to a bear, because he really were large. Ratonhnhaké:ton slept on his stomach, with the covers pushed past his torso and resting just on his hips. His back remained facing you and in the light of the fire that crackled gently in the fireplace, you could see each muscle that rested beneath his skin beautifully. If you looked close enough, you'd be able to see each freckle and one night, you'd found yourself counting them to help you fall asleep. Alongside his freckles were scars, some light and faded, others not; which was a reminder of the life Ratonhnhaké:ton found himself living. A life of brutality, justice and pain. One you wished that your child would not intertwine themselves with.

With the fire roasting away in the hearth just opposite the bed, the room felt warm and stuffy. Long and restless nights were a rude welcome you had come to discover upon getting pregnant, but something felt different tonight in a way you couldn't pinpoint. The pain would come in waves, going and leaving, however it would linger in your lower abdomen and made you wiggle uncomfortably. It was still late out, that was apparent with how dark it was outside accompanied with the occasional hoot of an owl. It was something you had grown to love here, how peaceful it was, nothing compared to bustling city life with drunks causing arguments underneath your window. Sleep was rare experiance nowadays so with a soft huff, you began to move out of the bed. Perhaps you'll just sit by the window for a little, ponder more on baby names, ponder life with a child. Before you went to push yourself up and out of bed, Ratonhnhaké:ton stirred beside you. You quickly glanced over your shoulder, noticing he was just shuffling around in his sleep.

Sleep wasn't just an issue for you, it had been for Ratonhnhaké:ton too. So, you couldn't help but worry about waking him up. He'd been an anxious mess and you knew that he needed some sleep, as much as you did. He'd rolled onto his back, which allowed you to catch sight of his shirtless torso. His framed torso, muscles poking beneath his skin, his face soft with an occasional twitch here and there, his brows furrowing as if he were conversing with someone unpleasant in his dreams. Did he dream? Was this man capable of dreaming? Your fingers twitched to reach out, wanting to push some strands of his hair out and away from his face but you didn't want to wake him, so opted to leave him.

Just as you began to move again, you felt a sudden warm feeling begin to pool between your legs and thighs. A feeling you could only really describe as peeing yourself, which admittedly, hadn't been the first time since you had conceived. Quickly, you uttered a curse, you'd just been in the process to sneakily slide out of bed as to not wake Ratonhnhaké:ton and now - shamefully - you'd peed the bed. Shoving a hand down between your legs, you pulled back your nightdress to inspect the damage. Had you peed yourself? There wasn't an urge to pee, but that was for sure liquid. Before you could ponder it for a moment longer, another pain erupted and this time it was enough to make you suddenly snarl your teeth and hiss out. No, no, this couldn't be happening. The baby was coming now?

Before you could even turn to nudge Ratonhnhaké:ton's shoulder, it had shocked you to see him already sitting up. He was bleary-eyed but was slowly coming to his senses as his hand reached out to take your own.

"Is everything alright?" he asked gently, his voice like warm caramel as he squeezed your hand. You could see him half peering over, his sleepy features twisting up into worry. You shook your head, clenched your jaw to will away the pain and just gave a half nod, which even you knew was not convincing enough.

"I'm fine-" you choked out before getting cut short, another pain slicing through you and causing you to double over with a hand pressed firmly against your lower stomach. Ratonhnhaké:ton was quick to jump to his feet, quickly rounding the bed to drop on his knees in front of you. The light from the fire provided little sight, but he could see that the sheets beneath you were drenched. For a brief moment, you met his gaze and Ratonhnhaké:ton quickly stood to immediately begin dressing. "The baby-" you pleaded, tears stinging at the corner of your eyes as you let you another pained grunt, though this time it rolled more out like a scream.

"I will find Doctor Lyle," he spoke quickly, already shoving his boots on and beelining toward the door. Ratonhnhaké:ton tried hard to hide the panic in his voice, but it was there and in response, it only made you panic too; which you knew would have been the last thing he would have wanted to do. "Remain here," he urged gently, turning on his heel and stepping down the stairs. Ratonhnhaké:ton's boots stamped against the wooden stairs, you heard his heavy footing across the hall and out the door. The sound of hoofbeats thundered out the stables and down the path, echoing in your mind as you pushed yourself to your feet. Your legs trembled and almost gave out as you gripped the headboard of the bed, using it to try and will some strength to your legs.

The urge to push came fast, so much so that you could barely step one foot into the bedroom before dropping to your knees. The pain became so unbearable that you fisted the carpet beneath you, letting out another scream that cracked and rung out in your ears. There was nobody you wanted here more than Ratonhnhaké:ton and admittedly, you wished that he never left. You hated to admit it, but you were terrified. What if something went wrong? What if something happened to the baby?

Within what felt like hours, Ratonhnhaké:ton returned with Lyle, who looked just as disbelieved as he did. They were both in pairs panting, having ridden so intensely on horseback and essentially skipped two steps at a time to reach you. Upon seeing you on your knees, Ratonhnhaké:ton quickly dropped to his own to join your side. No words were needed for him to see the pain, the worry and anxiety in your features, he'd always been good at reading you.

"Are you hurt?" he asked quickly, brushing away from beads of sweat that had developed on your forehead. It was hard to not snap at him, given how ridiculous his question seemed. Of course you were hurting! But you knew that he only asked you that purely because you were not on your knees when he had left. The look you shot him from beneath furrowed brows was enough for his lips to purse as he just nodded, taking that as a sign to not ask such questions.

"This position is not ideal for childbirth," Lyle began, dropping his leather bag to the floor before moving to step behind you. "Water and cloth," he instructed to Ratonhnhaké:ton, who pressed a lingering kiss to your forehead before jumping up to retrieve the items that Lyle needed. It was hard to focus on what was happening around you, Ratonhnhaké:ton's heavy steps, the splash of water as he carried the basin up the stairs, the rich smell of medical instruments that made you feel sick. In fact, the pain now had gotten so intense that you did want to heave up on the floor. Just as another groan rippled out from between your clenched teeth, you promptly gagged and quickly swallowed back bile. No, this was not happening, you weren't going to throw up while giving birth at the same time, you needed to pick a damn struggle.

The Assassin placed the water down beside Lyle, lingering with uncertainty as he returned to your side, allowing your hand to enclose around his and squeezing almost his fingers off. You could see from the corner of your eye how Ratonhnhaké:ton kept glancing between you and Lyle, wanting to do something and yet not knowing what to do at the same time.

"We need more light in here, Connor," Lyle lectured, waving a hand to the man beside you. Shooting you a glance, he stood and began to light candles. You could've sworn you saw a soft tremble in his hands.

"I need to push!" you screamed out, dropping down onto your elbows and essentially screaming down into the hard wood flooring.

"Now, let me check quickly, to see if-"

"I. Need. To. Push!" you snarled out, shooting him a look that made him shuffle uncomfortably. Lyle glanced at Ratonhnhaké:ton, jerked his chin toward you and soon enough, the man fell back down by your side.

"You need to listen to him," Ratonhnhaké:ton worded his words carefully, frankly, a little afraid of his lover more than he had ever been with any other Templar. You wanted to snap, to scream and yell at him but the pain overwhelmed you and you only doubled over again to scream. The sound of your cries made Ratonhnhaké:ton's heart ache and he glanced up at Lyle, almost with an expression of 'what do I do?' Lyle wet his lips with his tongue, moving to open up some windows to allow a draft to come in, it had indeed gotten very stuffy. He once again took position behind your bottom, lifting your nightdress which now was damp with the fluid that had leaked out over you and sweat that made you feel sticky. You could feel hands all over you and it felt horrible, if you weren't in so much pain, you would have snapped at them. Ratonhnhaké:ton's hands were kinder though as he helped pull off your nightdress, keeping his body covering your front as to give you some decency. "Come, give me your hands," he instructed gently, already pulling your palms away from the floor and helping guide your hands up around his neck.

The man took the position in front of you, allowing you to lean against his chest as he supported you, his hands running down your back in a weak effort to comfort you during each contraction. Lyle, meanwhile, had began assessing you, under the hard gaze of Ratonhnhaké:ton. He hated having another mans eyes on you like this, but said nothing as he knew that it was just something Lyle had to do in this sort of profession. Lyle's hands poked and prodded you in ways that made you cringe, burying your head deep into Ratonhnhaké:ton's shirt and inhaling that familiar scent he had to him. Pine, sweat and just a hint of an oceanic smell that he always carried with him. As if his days out to sea had tainted his skin.

"I know the pain is great," Ratonhnhaké:ton began, dipping his head down beside yours. His hand moved to pull your hair back and over your shoulder, allowing him to see the sweaty expanse of the back of your neck. His voice was so soft, calm and collected and in return; it relaxed you to some extent as Lyle continued to examine you. "Think of holding our child," he was trying to distract you, it wasn't working but you were thankful for his attempt. "You are so strong," he whispered, pressing his lips against your damp neck. His hand took the back of your head, stroking back the loose strands of your hair that had fallen out from its braid.

As another overwhelming urge to push began to control you, you found yourself sobbing gently into his chest, wetting the shirt he had thrown on carelessly. To hear you sob like this, it broke his heart and he tried to control the wobble in his own bottom lip with a hard clench down of his jaw.

"I can't do this, Ratonhnhaké:ton," you whined, fisting a part of his clothing. "It's.. the pain, I cannot-" you were babbling as the tears ran down your face, leaving your eyes and cheeks tingly.

"Yes, you can," he was quick to cut you off, offering more words of encouragement to stir you away from this mindset. The sudden change in your temper was no surprise and he so wished he could pluck this pain away from you and endure it himself. His gaze turned up and away from your head, looking toward Lyle who now sat back on his calves.

"Alright," he began, giving Ratonhnhaké:ton a nod that he knew he needed from one man to another. "When the pain comes again, you must push, do you under-"

Another sharp scream spilled out from between your lips, interrupting your sobs as you began to quickly use all the energy you had to push. Admittedly, it helped relieve some pain, but now it had only gotten worse, feeling as if your cunt were splitting open. You leaned your whole weight onto Ratonhnhaké:ton, your hands squeezing his shoulders as you pushed with all your might. In the dim light of candles, the visibility was hard and Lyle knew himself that this position remained difficult for him to see, help and guide the baby out. His look up alone at Ratonhnhaké:ton spoke his concerns, only for Ratonhnhaké:ton to push those thoughts aside with a sharp shake of his head. You seemed comfortable in this position and he wasn't going to suddenly force you up and onto the bed if you didn't want to.

Taking a breather for just a moment, you began to push again, with Lyle's hands hovering just beneath and between your legs. This amount of pushing was already making you light headed and your mouth felt incredibly dry, but Ratonhnhaké:ton's previous words only continued to motivate you to keep going. You wanted nothing more to see your baby, to hear the cries, to feel them against your chest.

"That's it!" Lyle encouraged, "I feel the head." A wave of relief washed through your body as you took a brief moment to catch your breath.

"You're doing so well," Ratonhnhaké:ton spoke in your ear and you could hear his voice wobble and waver, you daren't look at his face because you knew that his tears would be blurry with tears that threatened to fall. He couldn't remember the last time he had cried, but on this occasion, he were thankful the tears weren't ones of sorrow.

"A couple more pushes now and your child will be here," Lyle spoke, his own forehead covered in sweat. You felt Ratonhnhaké:tons hands squeeze your upper arm, you could practically feel the excitement pooling off of him. So, after a couple of breaths, you began to push again. You did everything you could to ignore the pain, the only thing riling you on was the idea of meeting the little one, your little one. One you had grown, one you had felt kick in all places that felt unnatural.

The sudden sensation you felt between your legs was one you had never felt before, a sudden dropping and you'd almost yelped out at the idea of suddenly dropping the baby right there on this hard wooden flooring. But thankfully, Lyle caught the small thing and quickly grabbed for clothes and fabrics. Almost instantly you broke into tears, dropping all your weight onto Ratonhnhaké:ton as your chest heaved to catch your breath, heart racing and hammering in your ribcage. The sound of the cries did not follow however and your sobs got cut short, peeling your head away to glance up at Ratonhnhaké:ton; who admittedly looked pale.

"What?" you croaked, voice breaking as just as you moved to turn your head, Ratonhnhaké:tons hand quickly guided you back to his chest. Why had these been no cries? No celebrations from Lyle? The Doctor was moving quickly, rubbing frantically against the baby's back, which fell limp slightly in his hands.

"Come on, little one," Lyle spoke, voice strained as he moved to quickly lift the baby from his ankle and giving his bottom a soft slap.

"Ratonhnhaké:ton?" you asked, voice already breaking. Had something gone wrong? Had you done something wrong? You couldn't believe it, didn't want to, it was only a couple nights ago that this little thing was kicking your ribcage like you were some punching bag.

Ratonhnhaké:ton's face however was blank as he watched, chest feeling tight. The only thing he could do was hold you close and he had never been a religious man, but in this moment, he found himself praying. He wasn't sure who to, where his prayers were being heard, but he hoped, begged that some being out there heard him. Quickly, he peppered a layered amount of kisses at the base of your head, just watching Lyle work against his child with unshed tears.

Just as you wanted to turn, to scream and sob and cry, a sudden sharp wail split the air and it seemed both you and Ratonhnhaké:ton let out a breath of air the both of you hadn't known you were holding. Lyle too as he quickly wrapped the baby up, cutting the chord and allowing you to reach out for your child; not finding a care in the world that he looked upon your naked torso.

"It's a boy," Lyle announced, wiping his forehead with the back of his hand once you had taken your son within your arms. He needed a drink after this.

Your little boy was beautiful, a button nose, soft skin which was dark like Ratonhnhaké:tons, with a bundle of hair on the top of his head which equally was darker. Frankly, he was a spitting image of Ratonhnhaké:ton but you didn't mind, how could you? He was perfect as you felt him writhe and cry against your chest, grumpy at the idea of being out here and not within the comfort of your belly. You had been sobbing so much that you didn't notice some sniffles beside you and slowly, you turned your chin up to notice Ratonhnhaké:ton, who remained knelt beside you. During the many years you spent with Ratonhnhaké:ton, you had never seen the man cry, never seen him shed a tear and yet, now, here he was. Sobbing with a controlled manner, his lips tight as looked down upon you and his son. The sight was enough to make you smile and yet, you continued to sob. Ratonhnhaké:ton moved down to press a kiss against your forehead, his lips lingering before he pulled away to glance back down at his son. His son. It felt strange to say that now.

"He's beautiful," he croaked gently, bringing up a hand to tenderly stroke his sons cheek, but stopped half way. His hand had brought so much pain, had seen so much blood, how could he be careful? How could he be tender and kind? What if he hurt him?

Sensing his hesitation, you moved gently to hold out the small, bundled baby before him.

"Hold him," you encouraged in a hoarse whisper. Ratonhnhaké:ton hesitated before allowing you to slowly guide his arms into place before gently settling the small baby snug against him. The child looked like a grain of rice compared to Ratonhnhaké:ton and you could tell how still he remained to be, as if the baby were made of fine china.

Ratonhnhaké:ton looked down upon the baby in his arms and suddenly, everything just felt right. He were the happiest he had felt in awhile. content and yet so afraid. Afraid of what was to come, if, that somehow, Ratonhnhaké:ton had now rained his curse of misfortune onto his son. That his son would endure the same hurt as him, that he would fall into the Brotherhood and become one with the Creed. He worried that perhaps, his son might lose Ratonhnhaké:ton the same way he had lost his own mother. His heart ached because in ways, he didn't know how to be a father, how to care, how to love, how could he have known when he had never one himself? Slowly, Ratonhnhaké:ton extended a hand and this time, brushed his pinkie up against his sons cheek. His skin was so soft, so untouched and innocent. That he had never known pain and suffering like his own father, unknown to how cruel this world could be. How can he do this? Be a father? Love, protect and fight at the same time? Before he could find himself falling further and further into despair, a small hand suddenly clasped around his pinkie finger and Ratonhnhaké:ton felt the tears fall again. Maybe that was the answer he just needed.

"We need to name him," you probed gently, causing Ratonhnhaké:ton to glance up. Lyle had finished the rest of his examinations and continued with just tidying, allowing you the time with Ratonhnhaké:ton. A name, that was right. Ratonhnhaké:ton had touched briefly on an English sounding name, not wanting his child to endure the same cruelty he had faced.

"Kariwase," Ratonhnhaké:ton replied too quickly, quickly glancing up at you for some approval. His suggestion of a name such as his own surprised you, but you weren't opposed to it.

"Kariwase," you repeated, feeling how the name sounded on your tongue before giving a soft, weak smile.

-

"Rake'niha!" the small voice called out, little feet padding down the hall and out the door. "Rake'niha!" the voice called again, this time it sounded further away. This child was a blur sometimes, especially with how quick he ran out an open door. One moment Kariwase had been beside you, now, he was outside running to greet his father.

"Hey!" you called out quickly, dropping the spoon in your hand to quickly run after him.

It had been four years since the birth of Kariwase, since you became a mother and it had been difficult. It wasn't that you didn't enjoy it, you loved every part of motherhood, it's just nobody had really prepared you. The first nights were sleepless, both you and Ratonhnhaké:ton taking turns to comfort Kariwase, Ratonhnhaké:ton sometimes falling out of bed at his cries, other times you'd find yourself asleep in the chair with him on your chest. It was apparent that you struggled with it more than Ratonhnhaké:ton, who had taken the role of a parent far quicker than you imagined. It was like being a father suited him more than anything else. He had the patience of a saint, which probably helped and he always knew what to say or what to do in terms of comforting you whenever you found yourself becoming overwhelmed. As Kariwase grew, so did he features and a part of you were thankful that he had your eyes, considering that everything else was Ratonhnhaké:ton. His freckles, dark hair which was thick, his nose remained buttoned which he must have took from you. He was adventurous though, so much so that it was often he'd dart out any open door at any given opportunity.

"Hey, you!" you scolded, quickly running toward the opened door and stopping just at the frame. That was something you had learnt quickly, your mothering voice, the one you used to scold Kariwase whenever he was naughty. The small child had already been caught by Ratonhnhaké:ton before he could dirty his feet on the path below, which brought you some relief at knowing you didn't have to clean the floors again. "This child," you huffed, hands on hips as you watched Ratonhnhaké:ton ascend up the steps with Kariwase on his hip, looking rather pleased with himself. "He needs to stop doing this Ratonhnhaké:ton, he's going to hurt himself." Ratonhnhaké:ton could sense the underlying hint of stress in your tone, his brows furrowing as he approached you and stopped just at the other side of the doorframe.

"He is a child, he is learning," Ratonhnhaké:ton replied, voice soft and gentle. You hated this, whenever Ratonhnhaké:ton excused actions and honestly, it made you feel bitter. You couldn't help it and it wasn't that you disliked your own son because of it, you just wished you had some back up every now and again. It was rare for Ratonhnhaké:ton to scold Kariwase, rare to raise his voice and shout, so it felt that Kariwase got away with a lot more than he should've. But he was right after all, he was just a child and your shoulders slumped a little at acknolwding that fact. Perhaps you were too hard on him, which made sense why he preferred Ratonhnhaké:ton more over you - his own mother.

Ratonhnhaké:ton hated whenever you put yourself down, whenever you spoke about how you were a bad parent and in this moment, he saw the conflict on your face. His lips pursed, knowing the struggles you had ever since giving birth. It was the reason why he stayed home a lot, allowing other Brothers of the Creed to take his place while he cared not only for you, but Kariwase. He had only stepped out to help in the repairs of the bridge and in doing so, he felt it only created an unnecessary argument later. Ratonhnhaké:ton wasn't one to argue, not with you, but the strain of your relationship had been there since the birth.

"What do you say to, istá?" he asked, turning to look at Kariwase. The small boy wiggled in Ratonhnhaké:ton's arms, feeling uncomfortable with the look his own father gave him.

"I'm sorry, momma," he replied reluctantly, his soft spoken words and defiant look down to avoid your gaze making your heart clench. It was hard to stay angry at him, but he was an unruly child. With messy hair, half braided like Ratonhnhaké:ton's, the other half frazzled and in need of a brush.

"Just- go inside, please," you urged, waving a dismissive hand as you pressed the same hand to your head. Ratonhnhaké:ton lingered though, only moving to place down Kariwase.

"Stay inside, I will be there soon," he soothed before pressing a kiss to his sons head, giving his shoulder a soft nudge to encourage him in. Once he straightened up, his hand reached out to touch your elbow gently, noticing how you would avoid his gaze. "I'm sorry," he began gently, trying to catch your gaze as he stepped in front of you. "I should have stayed to help you here." Ratonhnhaké:ton always had a way with words, always apologised for his mistakes and it was the main reason why you loved him so much. "I see your struggles," finally, you turned your head to meet his gaze. He looked sincerely apologetic, brows furrowed together and eyes puppy-like.

"It's not your fault-" you began, knowing that he also had duties here on the Homestead.

"It is," he cut you off, stepping closer to brush some hair away from your face. He towered over you in all the right ways and you had to lift your chin to look up at him. "I'm the one who got you pregnant after all," he mumbled, a soft flush creeping up his freckled cheeks. It was hard to not laugh and you chuckled, rolling your eyes and swatting him away. It was apparent Ratonhnhaké:ton's words were no joke, so your laugh at him confused him as he narrowly avoided the swat with a sidestep. "My words humour you?" he asked, relishing in your laughter, hearing it again felt nice after so long and a soft smile tugged at the corner of his lips.

"You humour me," you replied quickly before moving to step past him, your eyes lingering with his. You knew that look anywhere; that man would happily get you pregnant again. Perhaps thats what your relationship needed, some sex; it had been too long.

As you stepped inside, Ratonhnhaké:ton followed and closed the door behind him. You could feel him lingering, removing his bow and placing that beside the door alongside his arrows. You'd meanwhile gone to find wherever Kariwase had wriggled off too, probably causing more havoc in another room. You were thankful that Achilles, god bless his soul, was in fact no longer here; even though you pondered if he would be pleased to have a small child running around here. "Where have you gone?" you muttered under your breath, searching each room and under the table. There was no denying that this was Ratonhnhaké:ton's kid, he was sneaky and knew where to disappear without even trying.

A burst of giggles could be heard from behind a curtain and you whipped around, narrowing your gaze toward a pair of small feet.

"Oh dear, it seems I've lost our son," you called out with a sigh, hands on hips as you glanced around. Ratonhnhaké:ton appeared, glancing at you with a raised brow before you pushed your index finger up toward your lips and pointed over at the feet, more giggles coming from behind the curtain. "Never to be seen again," you feigned a wavy voice, sounding as if you were on the brink of tears. Ratonhnhaké:ton smiled softly, crossing his arms and watching you two before speaking up himself.

"How could you lose him?" he asked, playing along to this little game. "I had seen him just a moment ago." The giggles intensified and you had to bite your lip to not laugh yourself.

"I just looked another way and he was gone!" you exclaimed. "Oh, you must help me find our son," you battered your eyelashes at Ratonhnhaké:ton, approaching him to press your hands against his chest and flattering him in more ways than one. "I cannot bare to part with him." Ratonhnhaké:ton caught your hands, thumbs caressing over your knuckles before nodding his head.

"Do not worry yourself, I am certain I can find him," he then took your hand and lead you back toward the middle of the room, kneeling down and running his fingers along the rug that sat centre of the wooden flooring; the same motion he usually did whenever he were out hunting and tracking some game. "Fresh tracks," he hummed, picking up a small wooden toy Ratonhnhaké:ton had carved himself for Kariwase.

"Why, that is his favourite toy, I hope nothing has happened to him," you exclaimed, lingering and peering over Ratonhnhaké:ton's shoulder. He shook his head, glancing up at the small pair of feet that poked out from under the curtain.

"Do you know what he looks like?" Ratonhnhaké:ton asked, glancing over his shoulder at you.

"Mmh," you pondered, tapping a finger on your chin. "He is rather small, with dark, messy hair. Why, much like you! And he smells awfully so-"

"Hey!" a voice yelped out from behind the curtain and quickly, you stifled a laugh and gasped.

"That sounded just like him!"

Ratonhnhaké:ton shot his head toward the curtain and stood straight, taking your hand in his own.

"You should stay close, it's not safe here for beautiful women like yourself," he spoke over his shoulder before the both of you essentially tip-toed toward the curtain. His words made you flush and grin, staying close behind him with your hand wrapped securely around his own.

"Look here," you pointed toward the creatures feet, "they look awfully like my sons!" Ratonhnhaké:ton followed your finger to the feet. "I know he is awfully ticklish, perhaps we should try and tickle them?"

"No, you stay behind me, this could be a trap," Ratonhnhaké:ton spoke before reaching out for the small feet. Before he could get close however, the curtain suddenly flew open and Kariwase jumped out with a scream, arms outstretched as if he were trying to be some bear. Just as he came charging toward Ratonhnhaké:ton, he was suddenly scooped up in large arms and thrown upside down over his fathers shoulder. Kariwase kicked and yelled, face turning red as Ratonhnhaké:ton stood up quickly, exposing his stomach to blow raspberries on the exposed skin. Giggles turned into screams as Kariwase kicked and thrashed to free himself.

"Istá!" the small boy cried. "Help!" You couldn't help but laugh and quickly, you approached Ratonhnhaké:ton, wrapping your hands around his arms to let him free the child.

"Put my son down!" you cried with a giggle, though before you knew it, Ratonhnhaké:ton had now moved quickly to lift you and throw you over his shoulder instead.

It was no surprise that Ratonhnhaké:ton could lift his son and you at the same time, earning you to now wriggle and try to free himself on his hard shoulder.

"Ratonhnhaké:ton!" you cried out, feeling a little dizzy from being in this position. "Put me down!"

But all you could hear was his laughter.

-

You watched out over toward the stables, the sun warm on your skin yet a soft breeze in the air, enough to make you shiver just a little. Kariwase was now ten and he was tall, though that wasn't a surprise; another feature he had gotten from his father and not you. He was his own little personality, with his own little voice and a temper that at times, became irritating and unbearable. Kariwase had become frustratingly stubborn, much like Ratonhnhaké:ton and at times you found the both of them butting heads more than any father and son should. The arguments weren't serious, normally over something stupid and most times, they'd both end up snuggling it out regardless. It was easy to see the distress Ratonhnhaké:ton carried with him though, hating the idea of butting heads with his only son, having the struggles and worries of turning out like his own father and essentially now having to argue with a little version of himself. You remembered back on the memory of Ratonhnhaké:ton's enjoyment in fatherhood, now he was struggling trying to navigate a little terror that was essentially a carbon copy of him.

In that time, you had gotten pregnant again and you welcomed this pregnancy with open arms. Of course, much like Kariwase, the pregnancy had been unplanned but you weren't opposed to another baby. You just secretly hoped and prayed this one would be a girl, that's all you wanted really, a little girl who sucked up to you rather than Ratonhnhaké:ton. There was no denying that their recent head butting had made Kariwase warm up to you more, which made Ratonhnhaké:ton naturally jealous.

Slowly, your hand rolled over the small bump on your stomach. Lyle estimated you were only six months, but you already felt big which gave you a good feeling that it had to be a girl for sure. Ratonhnhaké:ton had busied himself with teaching Kariwase archery, but it wasn't going well. Kariwase complained most the time, which you could tell was frustrating for Ratonhnhaké:ton. Slowly, you stepped down and approached the stables, earning both the boys to look up at you and Kariwase to lower his own little bow which Ratonhnhaké:ton had made for him.

"I think it's going to rain," you observed gently, glancing up at the dark, grey clouds that loomed over the Homestead. Kariwase seemed pleased with this, he'd much rather go out into the forest and go roll around in dirt than train with his father. "Perhaps you should come inside," you offered, sensing some tension in the air between the two. Ratonhnhaké:ton straightned up and gave a soft sigh. You understood his reasoning for teaching Kariwase the bow, but you couldn't help but feel as if now weren't the right time. That he were too young, he'd more rather go out and play and explore.

"Can I go out and play?" Kariwase asked, looking up at you with hopeful, chocolate brown eyes.

"You should continue-"

"You can go," you cut off Ratonhnhaké:ton, which earnt a look from him as Kariwase quickly discarded his bow on the floor and went jogging off, thankful to be away from the stables and to give his arm a rest.

"It is important he learns this," Ratonhnhaké:ton began, lifting up the bow as if hinting toward it.

"And it's also important he plays, that he is a child," you continued, brows furrowing gently. Ratonhnhaké:ton cringed at your words and you could sense his disapproval instantly.

Ratonhnhaké:ton agreed with your words, yes, but it wasn't like he were playing at that age. There were so many dangers, wolves, mercenaries, hunters, he needed to defend himself and he hated the idea of his son being out there with no way to fight for himself.

"I learnt this at his age," he remarked, snatching up arrows off the ground. It wasn't often his was this snappy, if at all. "It is important."

"Ratonhnhaké:ton," you sighed his name gently, moving out to touch his arm. You could feel the muscles flex beneath his skin, his bicep hardening as he avoided your gaze. It was partly because he knew that whatever you were about to say, it was right. "He is safe here," you began slowly, trying to catch his gaze as he always had done with you whenever you tried to avoid him. You could tell those words had some meaning behind it and his jaw tensed, brows twitching as he tried to process and understand that you were right. He was safe here, he hoped so anyway.

"And if the Templars come here? Find me, find him? You think they would be so kind to spare your life? Think that they were kind enough to spare-" he cut himself off, squeezed his eyes shut and glanced off. The death and mention of his mother still hurt, you saw that, you saw that hurt each time he needed her. Whenever he needed advice he would never get.

Slowly, your hand dropped down and took his, giving it a soft squeeze which he returned. You could feel his hurt and while you could not understand his pain, you knew that the events that happened so many years ago still tortured him.

"The Homestead is safe," you reiterated that, meeting his gaze and it was there you saw how glossy his eyes were. "You should play with him," you began, glancing off into the treeline where Kariwase had run off to. "I would, but Lyle really insists that I stay sitting, with the swelling in my ankles and such.." It was there you saw his gaze fall down to your small bump, hidden beneath the confides of fabrics belonging to your dress. The sight of seeing you round again, pregnant and glowing, with his child again nevertheless, it warmed his heart and he reached out to gently press the palm of his hand against your bump.

"And how is she?" he'd gotten the knack of addressing the baby as a she, despite the fact that both of you were unaware which gender the small child was. It was like a part of him were secretly hoping for a girl too.

"She is strong," you remarked with a smile, watching as he touched your bump tenderly. "Much like her father," you lulled, turning your chin up to observe his reaction. Ratonhnhaké:ton just smiled, moving his hand up to cup your cheek before pressing a soft kiss to your lips.

"She will be as beautiful as you are," he whispered gently, pressing his forehead against your own. Then, he pulled away, the touch fleeting as he continued to clean and tidy up around the stable. "I like this," he admitted and you raised a brow. It wasn't often he spoke like this.

"Like what?" you asked, watching him with a protective hand back on the top of your bump.

"Seeing you pregnant," he replied with a small, knowing smile before turning his back to you. He knew what he was doing and you scoffed, feeling your cheeks warm.