zombie blog

I think Mizu's mother was the wife of one of the white men — meaning she was his property because of the time period. I think she fell in love with a Samurai that was one of the retainers of Heiji Shindo, and then ran away with him to escape her horrid English husband. During that short time they had Mizu.

Shindo obviously sent other samurai to find them, and they did. They probably threatened to kill Mizu's mother if their father didn't kill Mizu, and we see the result of that in this scene. The father killed at least one of the men sent to find them, and then gave Mizu to the maid to take them away and hide. My best guess is that Mizu's father tried to fight the rest, but was outnumbered and killed. The men then took Mizu's mother back to her monster of an English husband.

(gif by @sobadbad )

i’m seeing lots of folks talk about this moment as ilya being jealous, and friends, this is not jealousy

this is self-loathing. this is self-contempt. he is staring into a mirror. (side note, this reddit post about mirrors symbolizing internalized homophobia in hr is well-worth a read)

he is not angry at shane. he’s furious at himself. he’s disgusted with himself. altho i don’t think it’s just internalized homophobia in this case. it’s more about his shame in general, because he actually let himself think that maybe someone would love him back. that he would be worth staying for, when no one has ever stuck around for him before

and he let himself believe for one tiny little moment that shane hollander, MLH golden boy, would risk (really risk, not just this dalliance a few times a year) his career and reputation and heart for him. what a fool. he should know better, because when has anyone ever loved him like that? never, except his mother, and she’s still gone, isn’t she? so what did he think he was doing, letting himself get pulled in so deep that he actually thought he might get loved back

Oh, I have one more question since we’ve just updated our policy.

fell of a cliff? spit blood

stabbed? spit blood

poison? spit blood