Devoted

Scorto hugs Casavir, trying to snuggle into him even with the armer. The coldest of in reminds him of Mama. He smiled. Scorto looks over at Duncan.

“Can I have a hug please Duncan? Im sorry for upsetting you both… sorry. But Bishop did save me from Rabbit!”

Scorto smiled up at Casavir.

“ So he can’t be all bad or he wouldn’t have saved me….and he likes me dancing and my outfit I had on…so he’s not completely bad right?”

“Oh, why not. But don’t go telling the others, else they’ll think ol’ Duncan’s getting soft,” the barkeeper obliged, a twinkle of mirth in his eyes. Casavir patted Scorto’s head affectionately before stepping away, allowing Duncan to provide a sturdy but spirited hug to the drow.

Casavir, only a few steps away, observed the scene with a smile. It started as a true genuine expression of familial warmth, but as the circumstances set in, the corners of his mouth felt… heavier. A hand lifted to rub his armored bicep, a gesture urged on from what lurked in his subconscious. He tilted his head, eyes lowered to the floor. Despite that, he swallowed and freshly renewed his efforts to maintain the outward appearance of gladness.

Is it too late for Scorto?

…Was I too late?

Casavir breathed in and tightly held his bright expression. Pale blue eyes lifted to meet Scorto’s gaze squarely, securely. “What is important is that you are safe here with Duncan and I. You are among friends. And you will have a safe place with us should you need somewhere to retreat.”

Scorto smiled at him, but can’t help the worry he feels, he knew the signs better then most when someone is worrid, from watching Malice from his own fear and habits he’d picked up because of them he knew what to watch for, added to the fact his little brother was not happy only a few minutes ago it made sense if Casavir was upset.

Scorto suddenly felt horrible, he knew Casavir didn’t like Bishop, he knew that and he’d….but just once couldn’t he be a little selfish? Just this once? He tried so hard to be a good big brother…but he really liked Bishop. But he didn’t, he…..

Scorto almost misses Casavir’s words, almost but not quite. Scorto blinks he swollows before he spoke, he felt worse by the second.

“I’m really grateful little one that I have you and Duncan as friends and family. I’ll remember… Promise…. I’ll.. I’ll try to keep Bishop from being mean and I’ll try to keep people from being mean to him. Maybe it will help him if he feels more safe here he’s… He’s very jumpy even though he tries to hide it. But I’ll be careful it’s not me he should be afraid of…. Mal will take care of him surface rules or no if he dose anything else bad to me. ”

Scorto moved then wiggling out of Duncan’s hug to move over and stand in front of Casavir, Scorto reached out and gently took Casavir’s hands into his. Scorto looks up at Casavir, his voice is soft he gently squeezed Casavir’s hands.

“I’m here, I’m right here little brother, I’m right here, I’m not leaving you. I’m not leaving you Mal, Mama, Duncan or Bishop…the tavern is my home, I’ve found a home and a family it’s not perfect, but I’m not perfect. But I promise, no that’s not enough, I spider promise I’m not leaving you, and I won’t let Bishop hurt you again. If…”

Scorto swollows and squeezed Casavir’s hands a little more.

“Even if my mother matron came back from the dead and ordered me to leave…I wouldn’t do it, I don’t abandon my family I’m not Drizzt…I won’t leave you, your my little brother…it’s my job to look out for you…. please don’t leave me Casavir? Please?”

Gently, Casavir told Scorto, “I can not find an encouraging word regarding the relationship you pursue with that man. But please. You must not attribute his avoidance to fear. Doing so will only shield him from accountability for his actions. Remember this, Scorto, and do not deny yourself humane treatment in exchange for his comfort.”

Perhaps there was more to be said about Scorto’s insistence on making promises that Bishop would break for him without hesitation, but the drow seemed to be wrapped in his own determination. A confidence creating a personal reality in which he could fix him, that somehow, he would be different from the others who became involved with him, that Bishop was a poor misunderstood creature rather than a calculating predator. Scorto’s firm conviction pained Casavir, and yet would pain Casavir further to see shattered. Scorto had hope. Would it truly be a fair deed to rip that hope from him in an attempt to shield him from harm further on down the line?

True righteousness was presently obscured to him. It left him stranded at the blind precipice of wavering judgment, uncertain of which side of the line he walked would be the fall. A line indistinguishable between kindness and cruelty, of security and violation, and for several moments the paladin did not trust even his own judgment. Maybe it was not up to him to make judgment, but to carry out the judgment of Tyr. He only prayed that the Even-Handed Lord would grant him clarity soon.

There was a woman in his bed. Casavir did not recall bringing a woman to bed. Therefore, when he opened his eyes during the night to the sound of rain pattering against the window, the paladin understandably had a fright. Immediately he jolted upright and moved to the edge of his bed, chest heaving with shock. He very nearly reached for the knife under his pillow, but something in his mind held him back from doing so.

After blinking away the sleepy haze, Casavir recognized sister Malice beside him. She nearly blended into the shadows in his room beside him in his bed, her figure only illuminated by the flash of thunder outside. There must be a good reason for this.

Malice felt him shiver, worried he was cold, she moved away enough to pull the blankets up around them both, and as Casavir laid down. She pulled him close.

“Shhh don’t worry, you’ll get warm soon I promise Casavir. Shhhh I’m here brother, shhh it’s alright. ”

At hearing his words she hugs him more.

“We both missed and worried for you, I’m happy you are home again. I hope it’s for a while, I missed you a lot….so did Scorto…also you have yet to meet our mother… Scorto it exited for that. Don’t tell him I mentioned it he wants to surprise you…. Mother doesn’t even know he’s got another child….he’ll be so happy I’m sure…I love you little one”

She gave Casavir another kiss on the fourhead.

Casavir idly returned her affection with the fleeting touch of his hand against her back. It would be some time before he could return to sleep - easing Malice’s fears was the least he could do until exhaustion would claim him once more. For several months, she and her brother were denied the sanctuary he so oft provided. How must they have both felt during that period of his absence! The paladin sighed and touched his forehead to Malice’s as the downpour outdoors continued to drum against his window.

“Mama is a nice person, although he doesn’t know yet he’s got another child. Would you like Scorto to tell him about you before you meet him? Don’t worry I’m sure he’ll be delighted to have another son. He’s very different there our mother he sees the value in Scorto that mother never saw, I’m sure he’ll see that in you as well I hope you will like each other. Also we have another brother he’s Mama’s firstborn so our older brother. I’ve not met him but Scorto has, he scared off some humans that where being mean to Scorto. Scorto said he’s very sweet I’m excited for when I get to meet him myself. I’m excited for you to meet them both little one”

There was a woman in his bed. Casavir did not recall bringing a woman to bed. Therefore, when he opened his eyes during the night to the sound of rain pattering against the window, the paladin understandably had a fright. Immediately he jolted upright and moved to the edge of his bed, chest heaving with shock. He very nearly reached for the knife under his pillow, but something in his mind held him back from doing so.

After blinking away the sleepy haze, Casavir recognized sister Malice beside him. She nearly blended into the shadows in his room beside him in his bed, her figure only illuminated by the flash of thunder outside. There must be a good reason for this.

Malice felt him shiver, worried he was cold, she moved away enough to pull the blankets up around them both, and as Casavir laid down. She pulled him close.

“Shhh don’t worry, you’ll get warm soon I promise Casavir. Shhhh I’m here brother, shhh it’s alright. ”

At hearing his words she hugs him more.

“We both missed and worried for you, I’m happy you are home again. I hope it’s for a while, I missed you a lot….so did Scorto…also you have yet to meet our mother… Scorto it exited for that. Don’t tell him I mentioned it he wants to surprise you…. Mother doesn’t even know he’s got another child….he’ll be so happy I’m sure…I love you little one”

She gave Casavir another kiss on the fourhead.

Casavir idly returned her affection with the fleeting touch of his hand against her back. It would be some time before he could return to sleep - easing Malice’s fears was the least he could do until exhaustion would claim him once more. For several months, she and her brother were denied the sanctuary he so oft provided. How must they have both felt during that period of his absence! The paladin sighed and touched his forehead to Malice’s as the downpour outdoors continued to drum against his window.

Sand stood at a display shelf, taking inventory of his many elixirs and scribing notes into a small book as he did so. There was a soft murmuring as he talked himself through the progression of his task, broken abruptly by the chiming of the bell by the door as it opened. His ears perked upwards.

“I’ll be only a moment,” the moon elf called over. Sand hadn’t yet had a chance to take a look at his guest. He finished his thought with the soft scratching of a pen against the page and placed it open on the counter so the ink could dry, and deposited his pen into the inkwell beside it. “My apologies for the delay,” he drawled as he stripped his gloves. “How can I he–”

At last Sand turned and caught a glimpse of Scorto. “Oh. It’s you.”

Scorto looks up at Casavir, he reached up and scrubbed his eyes trying to stop crying….it didn’t work.

“Mal…had came to see him a few days ago…she said it didn’t go well…so…I…I came to see him I brought him some cookies and tea….I just wanted to make sure everything was alright….and…and explain why Mal reacted the way she did…she doesn’t like surface elves except for Mama…she likes him. Mal is just really protective of me…but I didn’t want Sand hurt so I wanted to make sure he was ok…he…he kept saying things that where kinda of scary…I…I thought from how he was talking that he was wanting to Court Mal….she wouldn’t want that…but he said he likes his genitalia where it is…so he’s not going to do that thankfully….I told him that Mal wouldn’t do that but our mother Matron would have done it. That I saw her do it a few times, he said they we all must know how to have fun…and that he was being sarcastic….and then started to explain what that meant when I asked him to….that was kind…but then…”

Scorto looks away from Casavir.

“ It’s really a stupid thing to be upset about….but….he reminded me some of how Rabbit was… he’d get mad at me for not understanding things…and act like I was an idiot….I…I don’t mean to not understand….I don’t…. Sand was being nice!…he was just explaining….he didn’t mean to…it all my fault….and I….I just started thinking about how I’m not as good as I was before Rabbit and everything….and how I don’t want to lose any of the important people in my life again….and how I mess up all the time….and that I must be horrible to get punished so much…..it’s all my fault not Sand….he didn’t try to hurt me…or Mal…or say he’d hurt anyone….he said if he uncharacteristically decided to hurt me he’d not be able to just walk off…..it’s all my fault for getting upset over a small thing…I’m…. sorry.”

Scorto looks up at Casavir again. 

“ I’m sorry I just got you upset with Sand and I upset Sand….I want to go hide…I’m sorry Casavir… please don’t be angry with Sand.”

Sand closed his eyes and propped his elbow in his palm, placing his fingertips against the side of his face as he sighed. “Oh, Seldarine,” he remarked about the piteous display in the middle of his shop floor.

Casavir’s face held an unreadable expression as he patiently listened to Scorto explain, nodding wherever appropriate and glancing up at Sand. It was clear he’d been through an emotional ordeal in a very short amount of time - no wonder Scorto wept so bitterly.

Sand’s fingertips were now gently massaging the area of his face they were at previously, but with one open eye he peered down at Scorto with a steady, reading gaze. At least now the thought process that led up to this point was easier to comprehend... and he could be grateful that he was no longer suspected of emotional terrorism on this poor fellow. He sighed again through his nose and lowered his shoulders somewhat. For once he was immediately defended instead of becoming a convenient scapegoat.

Sand stood at a display shelf, taking inventory of his many elixirs and scribing notes into a small book as he did so. There was a soft murmuring as he talked himself through the progression of his task, broken abruptly by the chiming of the bell by the door as it opened. His ears perked upwards.

“I’ll be only a moment,” the moon elf called over. Sand hadn’t yet had a chance to take a look at his guest. He finished his thought with the soft scratching of a pen against the page and placed it open on the counter so the ink could dry, and deposited his pen into the inkwell beside it. “My apologies for the delay,” he drawled as he stripped his gloves. “How can I he–”

At last Sand turned and caught a glimpse of Scorto. “Oh. It’s you.”

Scorto kept his eyes shut tight for several seconds before looking up at Casavir. He saw the look Casavir gave Sand….it really wasn’t Sand’s fault…he hadn’t meant… Scorto didn’t think he did anyway…he sobs for and just put his head on Casavir’s shoulder for a few seconds before he spoke looking up and Casavir.

“It’s…it’s…not Sand’s fault….he didn’t mean to….it’s all my fault….not his… Sand was really nice…he was just explaining some things is all….and…and I…I’m Sorry….I’m so sorry….I don’t mean to understand thing’s….I don’t mean for that to happen…it’s not Sand….it’s not…he didn’t… didn’t know…he was nice…like…like Mama….”

He curled up into Casavir his whole body shook…he’s still crying.

He looks over to Sand and sobs out 

“I’m sorry Sand…sorry..I didn’t…I’m sorry cousin…sorry…I didn’t mean…”

He looks back at Casavir. His eyes hopeful.

“I’m really not broken? I’m really enough? Really? Even when I mess up so much? Even though I like Bishop when a lot of people don’t…..I’m sorry…I really like him..he’s sweet sometimes…sorry little one…”

Scorto kept crying looking up at Casavir he’s desperate to believe his little brother…but it’s not easy at the same time. He spoke voice soft.

“I want to protect you…I do..it’s my job but I’m afraid I can’t protect you like I could before… before the surface elves….I just want you and Mal and everyone else I care about safe little one….I want you all safe…but sometimes I feel so broke…like no matter what I do you’ll still get hurt…or leave me… because I’m bad…I must be to lost everything over and over…I’m sorry Casavir…I’m so sorry… please don’t leave me.”

Scorto hugs Casavir as best he can quietly begging Casavir to not go…he can’t help but fear that he’ll lose his family again…and that somehow it will be his fault.

As Scorto went on the events became even more puzzling and difficult to trace what went awry. The drow continued to weep pitifully in his arms. What happened? “No,” Casavir confirmed. “You are not broken - do not accept the burden of everyone’s wellbeing when you must focus first on your own. We are with you and will not abandon you.”

“I do not understand why you are concerned about protecting us. Were you or your friends threatened?” asked Casavir. “You need not be afraid to tell me the truth, Scorto.” Given the drow’s propensity to shield people who must answer for their actions, he found it somewhat hard to believe that nobody was at fault for this.

“Threaten? Casavir, I did no such thing!” Sand objected from the sidelines.

Sand stood at a display shelf, taking inventory of his many elixirs and scribing notes into a small book as he did so. There was a soft murmuring as he talked himself through the progression of his task, broken abruptly by the chiming of the bell by the door as it opened. His ears perked upwards.

“I’ll be only a moment,” the moon elf called over. Sand hadn’t yet had a chance to take a look at his guest. He finished his thought with the soft scratching of a pen against the page and placed it open on the counter so the ink could dry, and deposited his pen into the inkwell beside it. “My apologies for the delay,” he drawled as he stripped his gloves. “How can I he–”

At last Sand turned and caught a glimpse of Scorto. “Oh. It’s you.”

Scorto blinks hard trying to see through the tears that won’t seem to stop…he can hear Casavir…at the question of if he wants to be held…of course he wants to be held!…he tried to speak…it took several tries.

“I’m.. sorry…I didn’t mean to…I…I’m..I’m…sorry I don’t mean to be…to be broken…”

He sobs worse as the word broken leaves his month. He sits up looking at Casavir. He keeps crying worse then before.

“I don’t want to be like this….I’m..I’m soppose to..to protect Mal…and you..too…and Mama and Bishop…but…but..I don’t know if I can…I…I just feel..so..so broke…and I try…try to not let it show….I can’t help…it…I don’t want to be like this…..I…I want to be able to protect… Everyone…..I don’t want anyone else getting hurt….but I…I get so…so scared by…by things…and I…I….I can’t stop….I just want to be normal….I want to be the big brother I was before…”

He hides his face in his hands before going on.

“Before the surface elves broke me….I want to be like that for Mal…and you..and Mama and Bishop…and everyone…your my family now…it’s my job…I’m Sorry…..I don’t mean to not understand things…I’m…sorry…so.. sorry…I don’t want to be like this.”

He finally looks at Casavir.

“ I’m sorry little one…so sorry….you..”

He sobs more and choked gasping for air before he finally gets the words out.

“You deserve a better brother….then….I can be…I’m…so…sorry… Casavir…I’m sorry.”

Scorto curls back up into a ball. He hides his face and shut his eyes tight…he didn’t want to see the look on Casavir’s face.

“I’m sorry little one.” He sobs over and over.

Casavir gathered Scorto into his arms. “No,” he said softly, “no. You are not broken. You are enough, Scorto. Whoever told you this was deeply mistaken.” He took a moment to spare Sand a long, accusatory look.

The moon elf gestured helplessly, honestly bewildered where this all came from, but he had a sinking feeling that Casavir was not likely to put this down.

Sand stood at a display shelf, taking inventory of his many elixirs and scribing notes into a small book as he did so. There was a soft murmuring as he talked himself through the progression of his task, broken abruptly by the chiming of the bell by the door as it opened. His ears perked upwards.

“I’ll be only a moment,” the moon elf called over. Sand hadn’t yet had a chance to take a look at his guest. He finished his thought with the soft scratching of a pen against the page and placed it open on the counter so the ink could dry, and deposited his pen into the inkwell beside it. “My apologies for the delay,” he drawled as he stripped his gloves. “How can I he–”

At last Sand turned and caught a glimpse of Scorto. “Oh. It’s you.”

cunninginstinct​:

Well, that escalated quickly.  From cookies to panic attack with an attempt to educate being a bridge between the two - Sand could hardly keep up with the change in mood. Caught off guard somewhat, he took an involuntary step back.

“There, there,” the moon elf soothed with mounting discomfort as he edged towards the door. As naturally talented and skilled as he was with many things, full-fledged breakdowns was something he was ill-equipped to deal with on an emotional level and a professional level. “That’s… well, you’re… I simply–” Sand ran his palm down his face and, eyes closed, he tilted his head towards the ceiling. “Ah, hells. I’ll go and ask Duncan to send Casavir over right away. I’ll be just a moment… there you are, sit tight…”

Gladly, Sand seized the opportunity to flee from whatever it was he’d somehow triggered and headed straight towards the flagon to relay the urgency for assistance.

Scorto didn’t respond to Sand’s words. He just tried to make himself as tiny as he could.

He didn’t react when Casavir walked in.

Heavy footfalls on the floor slowly made their way to the tiny ball of weeping drow. There was a pause, and the slight sound of shifting armor. Casavir rested on one knee beside Scorto and announced his presence with soft words carried with a low timbre. “Scorto, I am here. I was told you had need of me and came as quickly as I was able.”

The paladin’s blue eyes scanned his adoptive brother, commiseration reflecting in his countenance. The urge to reach out and dry his cheeks seized him, but first and foremost he had to consider Scorto’s boundaries. “Would you welcome it if I held you? If you cannot answer at the moment, I will wait here for your reply.”

There was a woman in his bed. Casavir did not recall bringing a woman to bed. Therefore, when he opened his eyes during the night to the sound of rain pattering against the window, the paladin understandably had a fright. Immediately he jolted upright and moved to the edge of his bed, chest heaving with shock. He very nearly reached for the knife under his pillow, but something in his mind held him back from doing so.

After blinking away the sleepy haze, Casavir recognized sister Malice beside him. She nearly blended into the shadows in his room beside him in his bed, her figure only illuminated by the flash of thunder outside. There must be a good reason for this.

Malice felt him shiver, worried he was cold, she moved away enough to pull the blankets up around them both, and as Casavir laid down. She pulled him close.

“Shhh don’t worry, you’ll get warm soon I promise Casavir. Shhhh I’m here brother, shhh it’s alright. ”

At hearing his words she hugs him more.

“We both missed and worried for you, I’m happy you are home again. I hope it’s for a while, I missed you a lot….so did Scorto…also you have yet to meet our mother… Scorto it exited for that. Don’t tell him I mentioned it he wants to surprise you…. Mother doesn’t even know he’s got another child….he’ll be so happy I’m sure…I love you little one”

She gave Casavir another kiss on the fourhead.

Casavir idly returned her affection with the fleeting touch of his hand against her back. It would be some time before he could return to sleep - easing Malice’s fears was the least he could do until exhaustion would claim him once more. For several months, she and her brother were denied the sanctuary he so oft provided. How must they have both felt during that period of his absence! The paladin sighed and touched his forehead to Malice’s as the downpour outdoors continued to drum against his window.

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