Tinder Culture
One of my favourite TV shows is “How I met your mother”. I love the storytelling aspect of the show with the flashbacks and flash-forwards. I and many others who are holding onto hope to meet “The One” can relate with Ted’s character
Also, like Ted I have had many dating woes in my “quest to find love”. It seems that the older we get the harder it is to meet people who you can really connect with on every level.
With the introduction of Tinder, we have “hot singles” within a five mile radius. You can meet your potential mate without leaving your house. We view profiles the same way we shop online, for shoes. It has programmed us to think that if person A doesn’t check out we can find someone better with a few more swipes to the right. It has given us the mindset that we don’t really have to try too hard, and make much of an effort to get to know our matches because this is just a game. Out matches are no better than our collection of Pokemon.
I used Tinder for a while. I actually met my last boyfriend through the app. Yes, once in a while there is a unicorn. But nothing lasts forever. And when our relationship ended I was back on the app, trying to fill the void. However, with every match I made I realized how meaningless it all was. I had no intention of messaging these men because I didn’t want to make the first move. When someone did message me, we would go through the generic list of questions which I find rather boring. I found it emotionally draining to make small talk and to try to sound interesting. So I deleted my account and removed the app. Because it was bringing more hurt and disappointment, than good.
I realized that I didn’t need the validation of a Tinder match to make me happy. I didn’t have to be talking to new men to feel good about myself. Being content with where are I am and what I have accomplished by myself should be grounds for happiness. If and when I do meet my Mr Big, he will be a bonus to the happy life I have created for myself.
