- they hate my friends, and want me to spend less time with them, or completely cut them out of my life
- they get angry if I enjoy my time out with friends/family, and call my socializing derogatory names, as if hanging out with people was a luxury I’m not supposed to enjoy
- their behaviour towards me changes drastically based on who we’re with, they’re completely different when we’re alone compared to when we are in someone else’s company
- they make decisions for me and relay them to others without my permission, making sure I look selfish/rude/inconsistent/cruel if I don’t follow through
- they mock my talk, walk, behaviour, opinions and features in front of others
- they use my reactions to prove to others how I’m overemotional, too sensitive, hysterical or crazy
- they make me feel as if no matter how much I try, I’m never good enough
- they call me lazy/worthless/toxic, and act like they’re allowed to because it’s the “truth”
- they make me feel guilty and ashamed if I’m not there for them at any moment, and accuse me of caring too much about other people and activities, when I should make it all about them
- they use every opportunity to talk about themselves and ignore whatever I say as if I only said it to offer them a chance to talk about their own issues, even if their issues are much smaller
- they get angry if I don’t readily quit my own activities for the sake of accompanying them on theirs
- it’s always assumed I’ll sacrifice my goals and needs for the sake of theirs
- they seem to forget I have need for attention, affection and support, and no matter how much of it I give to them, I rarely or never get any in return
- they frequently remind me of how much I am to deal with, and how much they have to sacrifice because of me
- I always have to be reminded of how tough they had it and all the reasons they have for acting hurtful the way they do
- I always have to focus on their problems, and push mine under the surface, theirs just seem to be more important
- I always have to be considerate and hide my pain in order to not make them feel guilty
- I always have to forgive them and keep acting like nothing bad happened when they hurt me
- I’m sometimes scared of them, but I push it down and remind myself of the nice things they did
- I’m sometimes worried they’re going to hurt me, but I remind myself of their potential to love me
- I always have to focus on their problems, and push mine under the surface, theirs just seem to be more important
- I feel if I leave them I’ll be doing the same thing everyone else has done to them, and I don’t want to be that person.
- I feel like I’m here to prove to them that not everyone is awful, and that they can get what they need in life, and to restore their faith in humanity, and for this I’ve been enduring everything they did to me.
- I’m scared they’ll hurt themselves if I leave
- they humiliate and blame me for having problems and struggling with life
- they insist my problems are “made up” or just me dramatizing my situation
- they make me responsible for their feelings and actions towards me (if they do something it’s because “I made them do it”, if they feel angry it’s because I “provoked” them, if they feel unsatisfied it’s because I haven’t done enough for them)
- they use my past trauma/past experiences to explain why I’m distrustful and why I perceive them the way I do (implying that my perception is wrong and it’s my fault I don’t trust them)
- they minimize and dismiss my feelings, concern, worry, anxiety, fear (you’re exaggerating, you’re dramatizing, get over it, get over yourself, people have it worse, you’re lucky, you should be grateful)
- I can’t openly tell them when they’ve hurt me, I know it will make them angry/sad/upset
origamiaround
2087
prguitarman
titsay
