yall hear sumn?

i have a Persian agenda where i encourage every man i know to grow the longest and prettiest hair possible

personal agenda. Personal.

i’m speechless. there’s a guy for everything.

why on god's green earth would you show this to your mother

we're white

Whoever invented low rise jeans literally said “I hope fat people all kill themselves” out loud while they were sewing the first pair into existence

This shit always makes me feel like I’m crazy I can’t imagine caring about this shit. It blows my mind this stuff really touches yalls hearts….. you’d think they thwarted an alien invasion or something

if i see one more concubine bring her straight eunuch to pride

My divorced cousin is asking me for tips on how to ask his trans coworker out and I'm like.... I don't know my friend the LGBTQ doesn't actually share a hivemind

Take her out to see twin peaks fire walk with me at an indie cinema or to watch Ethel cain live

Ok any suggestions that aren't potential microaggressions

Take her to ikea and buy her a shark plushie