⚧︎ Tacos and Sushi and Anti-depressants ⚧︎

My face didn't bother me as much as I would have thought.

Wishing you we’re cis isn’t abnormal. What you’re going through is very normal. It’s hard, being trans is hard and society does a good job at making you hate yourself, but you can get there with the right support.

I think firstly its important to understanding two things: 

I think it’s fair to hate society’s transphobia, to hate gender and body dysphoria, to hate rejection, ect. and while it seems being trans is the root of these issues, it’s not. It’s society’s treatment towards trans people. You might not hate being trans but rather the suffering that society and other people have forced onto you as punishment for being trans.

You can’t detach you being trans from yourself. Just as a gay person can’t, or an autistic person can’t. If you were cis you wouldn’t be you. You need to accept that you can’t and won’t ever be cis. And that’s okay. That’s more than okay. It’s you.

1. Surround yourself with your trans community

For me surrounding myself with trans friends and older trans people especially, helped me so much. There are just experiences and things that cis people can’t get that other trans people will. I think the biggest thing is community by far, surrounding yourself with other trans people. Connect with your trans community even if its just through Facebook pages, or something.

2. Seek professional help

I’d also suggest seeing a therapist, a good one that has other trans clients. It helps alot to just have a stranger to talk to to work through these sorts of things. Of course I know it’s not always possible to have access to one. See if you can reach out to LGBT clinics or support centers? Somethings they have free therapists or even support groups you can join. 

3. Consume trans positivity  

I also found that just seeing some positive trans representation helped me alot too. I read alot of books written or about trans people, watched movies with positive trans rep (not that there’s alot), even just following social media accounts or watching Youtube videos. 

4. If you can, look into medical transitioning  

I think through that although all the above things helped me alot, it was only really through transitioning did I start being able to really learn to love myself.  It’s not just trans people who suffer from body dysphoria. Most everyone experiences some sort of body issues.