BytesAndCoffee

I was supposed to have an appointment at the edging clinic today but they called and told me not to come.

As the OP of this post, I’m going to threaten that if this gets to one million notes by the 10 year anniversary on 1 June 2026, one year from today, I will get a lower back tattoo of the loch ness bear monster.

Y'all know what to do Tumblr.

Because shockingly when people enjoy what they do (you make it enjoyable instead of just hammering on them) people WANT to do things!

Where is the button to shout this from the rooftop?

Does anyone else have that thing where after showering you need a highly variable amount of time to rest not so much because showering is exhausting but because you need to be reintegrated into the dry world

that's what the towel is for

Towels are inadequate for this task. They may get you _mostly_ dry, but they never actually finish the job. OP is correct.

they're not about getting you dry, they're about reintegrating you into the dry world

If that is their purpose they are very bad at it. The only way that I reintegrate into the dry world is lying on my bed and letting the air dry my off.

I have just performed the ritual mindfully and here's how it works. you keep one towel in the bathroom and one in the dressing room. as soon as you leave the shower you rub all your members vigorously with the towel and leave the towel in the bathroom. this takes you out of the wet world and now you are now in a liminal, naked བར་དོ་, cock and dick everywhere. you enter the dressing room. you put on a single symbolic item of clothing, a t-shirt or underpants or something. you then rub all your members again vigorously with the second towel. you are now in the dry world and entitled to dress, even if you are a little wet. we are often slightly wet in the dry world, and this makes no difference.

wait so you want me to jack off ALL of these trades😰

Woah mama just reminding my followers that TERF ideology is fundamentally evil and not welcome anywhere near my blog hummina hummina hummina

Protecting genuine women is „fundamentally evil“?

Protecting women is one of the most noble things you can do. Unfortunately you don't do that

official anti terf post

Woah mama I'm getting certification now

taking stock meme phrases and translating them into Ye Olde English is literally top tier comedy

POP THAT PUSSY PAUL REVERE

In TV, straight is the default, and actually straight characters never have to announce their sexuality, even if someone of the same gender hits on them. When a character has to announce that they are straight, it is almost always because that character is about to realize they aren't straight. Just saying.