Debt Debate

Being in debt is painful, I know.  It's so hard.  Chances are that there isn't much you can do about your financial situation right now.  I am sure that you are doing the best that you can- so I want to give you a few tips on how to deal with the rest of your life.  Especially your mental health.

1. Turn off the ringer to your phone or change your number. Calls from creditors get overwhelming and abusive.  Don't let that energy into your life. Keep your home phone for emergencies but turn off the ringer.  Give the people you love and want to speak to your new number and pick up your communications on social media.  

2. Enjoy the simple pleasures.  There are expensive splurges and simple pleasures.  At the height of our financial crisis, it was my birthday and we didn't have money to go out to dinner or even for a present.  Instead we went to the rooftop of the fanciest hotel in the city and sipped hot chocolate by an open fire.  It was a beautiful night.  There is always a way to get these simple pleasures.

3. Go bat shit on your bank. Debt often leads to depression, but being angry can feel so much better and be much more productive. Take actions against your bank and creditors.  If they have wronged you,sue them.  Write letters, yell at them on twitter (under an assumed name if that makes you feel better).  I once spent two weeks getting a court order against my bank.  I can't tell you how good it felt to walk in with a letter from the courts and make them do right by me.

4. Love your kids so much.  There are a lot of casualties of being in debt and whether or not you see it- your kids are taking a direct hit.  They see your stress and feel your pain.  Let them be a balm for your soul.  Find the time everyday to turn off the stress and just be with them.  Give them lots of hugs, read to them, cook for them and take them for hikes.  You don't need to buy them things to make them happy.  You have no idea how valuable your undivided attention can be.

The first step in controlling holiday spending is to know where it is going.

1. Presents nuff said

tip:

make a list and keep to it

Wrap gifts with brown wrap, and decorate with a simple ribbon, or have your children decorate with markers to create a personal touch Be creative. And that doesn't mean gifts have to be homemade. Here are some ideas for inexpensive non-traditional gifts:

Take clippings from one of your houseplants in late November. Let it sprout in water then plant it in an inexpensive pot with a ribbon tied around it..

Tap into your creative flair. If you are fortunate to have a knack for crafts, or a talent in the kitchen, pick up a magazine or search the Internet for gift ideas. From decorated jars filled with treats to homemade candles, with the right touch a hand-made gift can be pulled off with professionalism.

2. Travel additional demand and lower amount of flights things get expensive fast

tip:

Always compare prices, include train and car travel in the comparison 

Try to limit car travel even within the area, if you live warmer climates get out and walk, use bikes, or public transport

3. Food- whenever families or friends get together there always seems to be food

tip:

Turn your annual holiday party into a potluck or an afternoon event to limit the food and drink requirement.

Don't buy candy it's just expensive

Make only one protein, bulk up on veggies  your waistline will also thank you.

4. Decorations -  the average person spent over $100 on holiday decorations. Take stock of what you already have. Don’t give in to the temptation to just go out and buy a whole new set of decorations when you already have plenty to decorate with or repurpose in some way.

tip:

Take inventory of the decorations you own, including lights, baubles, and crafting pieces, so you have an accurate idea of what you really need to purchase this season.

Repurpose last year’s decorations. Think of different ways to repurpose some of last year’s holiday decorations or even reuse some Halloween and Thanksgiving décor from this year in a new way.

Repurposing other items such as old ribbon scraps, card stock, and wrapping paper leftover from last year’s wrapping projects can help you save money.

5. the Extras

this broad category encompass lots of little things, meals at restaurants, cabs, tips, etc. Keep Holiday spending in direct holidays expenses.

tip:

Use cash not credit cards

Evaluate any non holiday expense

Most of us don't have extra money laying around, so if you haven't already changed your habits to come up with holiday shopping money, now is the time.

1. No cards- Not only are cards expensive but postage is too. If you feel that cards are a must, send an e-card. Also less paper is better for the environment.

2. Instead of shopping create memories-  Find out if there is a local parade, take a family hike, go sledding. Kids and family bond over activities not just things.  Don't forget to take lots of pictures, because memories such as these will last a lifetime. 

3. Don't buy candy- not only will it blow out your diet but it is a total waste of money because candy is sold at higher price points during the holiday. Candy isn't essential for holiday meals and there is always plenty of desserts. If you want to do something sweet with the kids  make hot coco at home,  or popcorn balls.

4.  Cut nonholiday splurges- Think  things like happy hour every week, dinners and lunches out, parking at the closest (but most expensive) garage, cut out where possible.

The question is usually met with revulsion. Why would anybody deny their children gifts on the holidays. Wouldn't it ruin their holiday maybe even their lives. Well it won't. In fact, it may be a life changing experience that will be a profound positive moment in their lives. Having access to the best things in life may actually undermine one's ability to reap enjoyment from life's small pleasures.

 According to a recent study by psychologists at the University of British Columbia, young children are happier to give than to receive. In the study, toddlers who were asked to give away their own treats, as well as extra treats, showed greater happiness about sharing their own possessions, suggesting that the act of personal sacrifice was emotionally rewarding.

"The joy of helping others", says lead author Lara Aknin, assistant professor of psychology at Simon Fraser University in Vancouver, British Columbia , "is an inherent part of human nature".

The research was about seeing if the same joy of giving we see in adults is also present in our earliest acts of giving, notes "Many people think that children are inherently selfish and we need to teach them how to be nice and feel good about giving to others..

But maybe we don't need to train children to feel good about giving," says J. Kiley Hamlin, assistant professor of developmental psychology at the University of British Columbia, who was also involved in the study.

Moreover, pro-social spending can be a virtuous cycle. When people recall a time they spent generously, it makes them happy. That sets up and triggers a positive feedback loop between generous spending and happiness, according to Aknin.

Think about that this holiday season.

You may be financially obligated to companies but that does not mean they can abuse, harass or harm you and your family.

Here are some of the debt collectors cans and can'ts

They can:

A debt collector may contact you in person, by mail, telephone, telegram, or fax

If you don’t have an attorney, a collector may contact other people only to find out your address, your phone number, and where you work.

If within statue of limitations, they can bring legal action against you.

They can NOT:

Contact you at inconvenient times or places – for example, before 8 a.m. or after 9 p.m – unless you agree.

Contact you at work if the collector is aware that your employer prohibits it.

Harass, oppress, or abuse you or any third parties they contact about you.

Lie or mislead anyone when collecting a debt.

If an attorney is representing you about the debt, the debt collector must contact the attorney, rather than you.

If the debt is past its statute of limitations, they may not bring legal action. (find out your statue of limitations)

Harassment. Debt collectors may not harass, oppress, or abuse you or any third parties they contact. For example, they may not:

use threats of violence or harm;

publish a list of names of people who refuse to pay their debts (but they can give this information to the credit reporting companies);

use obscene or profane language; or

repeatedly use the phone to annoy someone.

False statements. Debt collectors may not lie when they are trying to collect a debt. For example, they may not:

falsely claim that they are attorneys or government representatives;

falsely claim that you have committed a crime;

falsely represent that they operate or work for a credit reporting company;

misrepresent the amount you owe;

indicate that papers they send you are legal forms if they aren’t; or

indicate that papers they send to you aren’t legal forms if they are.

Debt collectors also are prohibited from saying that:

you will be arrested if you don’t pay your debt;

they’ll seize, garnish, attach, or sell your property or wages unless they are permitted by law to take the action and intend to do so; or

legal action will be taken against you, if doing so would be illegal or if they don’t intend to take the action.

Debt collectors may not:

give false credit information about you to anyone, including a credit reporting company;

send you anything that looks like an official document from a court or government agency if it isn’t; or

use a false company name.

Unfair practices. Debt collectors may not engage in unfair practices when they try to collect a debt. For example, they may not:

try to collect any interest, fee, or other charge on top of the amount you owe unless the contract that created your debt – or your state law – allows the charge;

deposit a post-dated check early;

take or threaten to take your property unless it can be done legally; or

According to the  Federal Reserve Bank of New York  more than 14 percent of American consumers have an account that has gone into the third party debt collection market. In its “Quarterly Report on Household Debt and Credit,” the Federal Reserve Bank of New York (FRBNY) said that in the third quarter of 2012, 14.29 percent of Americans were in collection, the second-highest rate ever recorded (after 14.38 percent in the second quarter of 2011).

Seriously.

We are working on making a difference with that.  We know how screwed up the system is, which is why we created BUKIT.

Collection agencies are big brick and mortar businessess- believe it or not, it costs a lot of money to harass and chase after people.  We say, save the money and pass it on as a discount.