computer. show me hot guys

yknow kinda something special about the fact that i got a cut on my left hand ring finger while working on someone’s christmas present. that’s gonna leave a scar. every time i look at my ringfinger i’ll be reminded of it. the “wedding band” finger… kinda more intimate than marriage…

but also OUUUUUCCCCCHHHHHHHIIIIEEEEE

cut myself on the same finger while trying to cut a bagel…. idk how to romanticize this one guys

you have to fuck the bagel now

i have to fuck the bagel.

performed a highly controversial maneuver on the road today called "coming to a full and complete stop at the stop sign" that has drawn the ire of many people in the reckless driving fandom

feeding that old man a slutberry

slutberry friday

i'm bored everyone send in asks and share some hot old men (or any kind of man tbh) you want me to give a fuckability ranking to

standing in the produce aisle examining cucumbers and to the untrained eye it may appear as if i am trying to find the best quality cucumbers when in reality i am pretending i am holding heavy girthy orc cocks

joining the war on weird fetish porn on the side of weird fetish porn

realizing i have the power to write fetish porn of the niche characters i like vs. knowing it means i have to actually do it myself

everyone go leave fun little comments and tags on my posts now. i want to be nosy

just had my soul rent from my body and am now feeling a creeping darkness beginning to overtake me. ama

bear pussy

divorced dad cunt