âYou gotta eat your breakfast.â
âPlease donât tell me that breakfast is the most important meal of the day because that is just so clichĂŠ. Youâre better than that.â
âI was gonna say breakfast lowers LDL cholesterol and prevents fluctuating glucose levels that lead to type two diabetes.â
âHad the craziest dream last night. You donât understand. Iâm in this cave, right? Or maybe itâs in outer space. David Beckham is there with these two contact lenses and then like, blue one or red one, like heâs a sexy Morpheus from Matrix. And I donât know which one to pick. I donât know what to do with these things.â
âHey, [name], you have the craziest dream every night.â
âNo analyzing dreams before coffee.â
âWe should be hot PokĂŠmon for Halloween.â
âI get to be slutty Charmander.â
âYeah, well, at my old school, that would have been settled with a knife fight.â
âOh, my God. You guys are so repressed.â
âDonât therapize us, okay? We are not your patients.â
âSometimes, I feel like Iâm stuck on a Ferris wheel. One minute Iâm on top of the world, and the next, Iâm at rock bottom. Over and over, all day long.â
âActually. You know, I totally see you as a person.â
âThat was the biggest train wreck our stage has ever seen.â
âA secret, huh? Is it the same as my secret?â
âAs for how I knew I was gay, it was a bunch of little things. Like this one recurring dream I kept having about Daniel Radcliffe.â
âI think Iâm falling in love with you.â
âFor the record, I think Jon Snow is an excellent choice for your sexual awakening.â
âThereâs something about you that makes me want to open up. And that's slightly terrifying for me.â
âI donât think thatâs one of those things where you can agree to disagree.â
âAll right, hey, guys, Halloween party Friday night!â
âVery relieved that weâre in agreement on Oreos. That would have been a deal-breaker for me.â
âIs it weird that I have no idea what you look like, but I canât stop thinking about kissing you.â
âWell, I need you to help me talk with herâŚÂ and hang out with her and stuff, you know?â
âWhy would I help you do that? Are you blackmailing me?â
âI just think that weâre in a position here, where we could help each other out is all. So think about it.â
âRight now, these emails, they feel like this totally safe place. Iâm just not ready for my whole world to change.â
âItâs not all about looks, [name].â
âThis is, like, a new level of laziness, even for you.â
âDo you miss trick-or-treating?â
âHey, [name]. I bet youâre gonna have the best costume tonight.â
âI am post-presidency Barack Obama. So Iâm just chillinâ in Hawaii, drinking Mai Tais, writing memoirs and hoping Trump doesnât destroy my legacy.â
âAll right, Iâm gonna go eat my feelings away.â
âOh. Iâm sorry, I thought this was the bathroom. Sorry.â
âOkay, come on. We gotta get you home.â
âThe room stopped spinning.â
âSometimes I feel like Iâm always on the outside. Like tonight, you knowâŚÂ I was at that party, and it was fun, butâŚÂ it kinda felt like I was watching it from across the room. I donât know, thereâs this invisible line that I have to cross to really be a part of everything and I just, I canât ever cross it.â
âSometimes I think itâd be so much easier to be one of these people who can just take a few shots and then hook up with whoeverâs closest.â
âI think Iâm the kind of person who is destined to care so much about one person, it nearly kills me.â
â[Name], if I were a betting man, Iâd say you were drunk emailing me during that last letter. Donât worry. I liked it.â
âYou know what, [Name]? You deserve a goddamn superhero.â
âYeah. No, I donât mention it a lot because it kind of messes with my image. The girl who is excited. Girl whose life didn't just end, like, three months ago, whoâs angry and sad all the time. Girl who still believes in love.â
âHave you ever been in love?â
âYou know, this is stupid. Iâm just gonna tell her that I like her.â
âI promise you, youâre not gonna regret it.â
â[Name]⌠I am so sorry. I donât feel that way about you. But I really like hanging out with you and I donât know, maybe we could still be friends, you know?â
âI need you to help me decorate. Untangle these for me, will ya?â
âChange is exhausting. I feel like thereâs nowhere to hide from all the newness of everything. Except here. With you.â
You know what? You are insanely stupid, [name]. I was never in love with anyone else. I was in love with you!â
âI donât have anything to say to you.â
âPlease, please. I just wanted to say that I was sorry, okay?â
âYou deserve everything you want.â
âIn case the message got lost somewhere I justâŚÂ I just want you to know that I love you.â
âThatâs okay. You can give me somethinâ later that I canât get in the store.â
âOkay. Theyâre not paying me enough for this.â
âDo you wanna go to the carnival with us tonight?â
âI didnât think youâd come.â
âUntil I was walking towards you, I didnât think I had it in me.â
âAre you disappointed that itâs me?â