aleks marchant @brckebrained - Tumblr Blog

what do you call a sad cup of coffee? depresso.

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do you guys think that people still believe i single handedly put an entire strip club of dancers through college?

#it was at least two but not an entire club 😭

ate too much. tummy explode now

the bird that lives in our garden hates me and is plotting my demise, i just know it

can i get an F in the chat? my wife and 10 year old were having an entire conversation in russian and now the 10 year old is making fun of me because i'm not as fluent as i used to be.

but that's not the part she's making fun of me for, why is she making fun of me? because i forgot for an entire minute and a half that i can speak english and responded to their convo (of which i can understand EVERYTHING) in turkish.

#i would like to remind everyone in the chat as well that i was born and raised till i was 8 years old in russia

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i yearn. what do i yearn for? tbd

excuse-me-thanks

“i should take a walk for my mental health” boring, tired, i don’t even really wanna do it tbh

“i need to check the perimeter” i need to check the perimeter

#mental health

i love when my wife sends me links to a six hour spotify audio called "a day in the life of a royal concubine in the ottoman empire" like yes. yes, i do want to experience what being a royal concubine in the 15th-19th century was like thank you

#her exact words btw were “for you”

soon. soon™ i will be able to hold another baby in my arms

#children

mamiaztec

make yourself at home in my rib cage

scifi-elpides

fuck that nonchalant shit

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i got fresh spicy noodles for dinner.

#food

i love watching anime’s with reincarnation plots, they’re always high key ridiculous and funny

currently obsessed with dinosaurs actually

someone threw mashed bananas at me today and one day i'll figure out who as soon as someone learns how to snitch in this house

#food

it’s important to me that we acknowledge my dog

#body image #linc.selfie

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my wife hates me. she hates me and my whimsy.

consider scamming your partners as an early valentines day gift

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aleks marchant