1LLAUREN

okay so we all know pap likes to crawl around and excuse all of his actions via his own trauma right ? i mean ofc now nobody believes him anymore but to drive his shitty excuse further into the center of the earth let's go at this from a psychological perspective and from my own experiences cause i also have a deviantart oc level backstory for all of my trauma- ofc this doesn't mean everyone with trauma is the same or isn't problematic, i understand and have researched this cause i am someone who actually cares about this and not just the ways i myself deal with it

it would be pretty easy to say that nobody talks like this about their trauma (or supposed trauma), but lets look at this from a few different points, that being- the facts that his story changed numerous times, isn't consistent like at all, and most importantly it feels very off in the way he writes about it and the way he says all of this once someone calls him out + how he speaks about this

firstly, let's get the biggest point out of the way, the fact he's changed his story multiple times enable to have either an excuse, seem sympathetic, or fit their own narrative

there are many many screenshots where he has said that he was mostly abused by women and very little by men- then suddenly, when he changed into his woman persona (or mask) it changed into " i was abused more by men than women " + how he very convienently has stories for whenever he gets called out or confronted on his bullshit

seems very weird doesn't it now that it's said eh ? i dont think anybody, not even if they're actually traumatized and doing shit like pap does would speak about their trauma in this way

i dont think trauma suddenly just adds on like this to the point you have very convienent stories for literally everything, even in his doc it says this

i don't think your trauma is real especially if you talk about it like this

now onto the next point, how he speaks about his trauma; you can very clearly see in all of these screenshots, that he frequently talks about pretty serious things in a very shitposty or joking way- not saying that people dont speak about their trauma in a joking way, but usually it is not like this, it feels more like a story/list on why people shouldn't be angry at you or call you out on doing things that are pretty shitty (like lying about who you are and your own trauma n shit)

also the fact he made a whole ass doc about this when he switched his identity over to being a " totally real 100% woman girlboss lesby sapphic queen " is weird too, usually, people do not make docs when they do something that is insanely shitty just to go and say " oh yes me trauma i have like one gazillion traumas i got raped and sexually assaulted and my eyes got gouged out and omniman ripped my dads head off infront of me ooooo also i got ran over by a car and forced to read wattpad when i was 3 years old "

i don't like spec on peoples' traumas and so on but if i have to be honest he clearly doesn't have trauma if you actually look at his history and past with a clearer lense; he had so much " convienent " excuses as to why he had done so much shit + how he lies a wholeeeee lot enable to have things fit his view- i'm very sorry to mention bituin but in her doc you can very clearly see that pap has said that he has had girlfriends and boyfriends before- yet magically, just like the wind, his " boyfriends " never existed now, and it's him screaming and hollering about how he's only had girlfriends and how he's 100% solidly a lesbian with absolutely no boyfriends before + also the fact he says right here that he can't have a normal relationship despite somehow blasting out ot the blue with a girlfriend one day

again, i know i probably sound like a massive asshole here but the way hes so willing to lie and how he speaks about all of this is very weird, i think its fair to stop believing you have trauma especially if you say things that are super suddenly " useful " whenever you get confronted and swing your supposed trauma around like it's a get out of jail free card

not saying that trauma doesn't explain certain personality stuff or the actions someone does but there's a massive difference between slinging it like its some sort of award you win or like a freedom ticket vs. explaining your trauma to someone as a reason why you act or do certain things

my conclusion is, pap very clearly has a case of munchausens, convienent liar syndrome or spoiled brat syndrome

nobody should be taking this bitch seriously, especially shown that he very much likes to lie- and lie A LOT.

bro is butthurt cause he cant push my husband or i into hiding what we say

like isnt this also proving what people say about you ? that you stalk people who hate you and get your degenerate friends to harass them ? holy moly do the jokes write themselves

i hope your mom or dad beats you shitlessly cause you deserve it like my god bro you need some sense

also my husband wanted to say that he found your crying video on twitter and found it stupid and laughed at it cause like it is very funny that you cried over your mom scolding you to most likely clean up your shitty gooncave

he and i joked lots about it cause it's super funny like you can't deny it, with how fake you are and desperate to make people feel bad about you

besides if you say youre a guy again then me and my husband are right and you're just a creepy cisdude trying to prey on women and afab people

Pap - wow you learned something about German culture!

DÖNER YUMMY but also it's very fake like you -

Bc they mix meat together just like you mix stuff together and lie WHhahahha

Besides Döner isn't an insult- it's funny bc you are insulting the Turks actually. Since it's a food made by the Turks.

So good luck at dealing with Turks getting angry now.

So think better and use something original I can tell you that your names getting better and besides I'm still waiting for you bc I'm not moving my ass to you.

Since narrsicst love it - when you come to them so I will be waiting for you to move you sorry pathetic ass to me.

Bc I have more stuff to show you !

Also loving cats again ? What about your cat lottie and felix whatever.

Or did you forget about them because they don't give you any more likes ?

Also holding cat like on the throat isn't nice imangen like I do it to you pap.

Would you like it no ! Cats don't like it !

Besides it looks ai I know you like ai since you had posted AI pics of you so called favorite characters

Danny Danny why using male stuff now showing your true self you are an guy now ? Well guess what my wife and I joke and say you are an creepy cisman who wants to pray on afab people somehow also what about HMMMM LET SAY IF YOU WERE REALLY A GAY MAN - why never had any gay man or man as friends only girls eh ?? Why hmm and WHAT ABOUT THE TIME YOU KINDA USES BLUSH EMOJIS AND WERE A BIT FLRITY AND PUTTING HEART EMOJIS ON MY STUFF AND WHAT I WROTE

Finding me sexy eh ? ~

Now Dan or tuff guy come and talk to me you fucking coward - come here and show DADDY CARROT !!! what you can offer as insulting words or are you going to write it all in private in your servers - come to papa and say the stuff you tuff guy you are.

I will pray for you even tho you hate being Christian probably.

Tuff guy, tuff guy - doxxing is a coward way.

Tuff guy, tuff guy are you going to say - how good I look showing my middle fingers.

Tuff guy , tuff guy big mouth but no courage to say in face, why

Also I wrote a shitty song for my only true fan named PAP

like damn im sOOOOooo sorry i didnt know the pedophile animal abuse enjoyer and his loving cuckold third wheel who nobody likes got super offended at my husband and i's posts, we will both continue to make them and mock you both so you guys can sit and spin all you want and maybe, next time, cut deeper, maybe then we might feel bad- but it's a 0.000000000000000000000000001% chance ! will you take it ?

but my god you useless holes are the reason why people like me who actually self harm get treated unseriously, i bet you guys even like seeing people who actively struggle with this suffer just because sociopathic kiddie touchers like you hurt themselves and it makes everyone look manipulative

the more you do this, the more people wont care, and then what ? will you shoot yourselves on video to make us feel bad ? whatre you gonna do about it ?

but hey, killing yourselves is too fast and super cowardly, maybe you should check yourselves both into a russian gulag ! then maybe it'd correct you both and then you could learn life lessons there, besides i know that lila isnt even a russian, she's a ukrainian who pities herself so much that she'd betray her own country in the midst of an invasion and say " ouuuggg im a russiannnn !!! "

and oh boy once my husband showed me this it was like the most funniest shit i had ever seen in my entire life, lila you are literally a failed abortion- unwanted, terrible, and ugly as fuck ! like my god you look like if a rotted wood plank tried to look like a woman but they smoked for 60 years

besides, nobody truly likes you lilac, at least with me my husband actually cares and loves me unlike with you- who is stuck being a cuck to someone who is using you more than a farmer uses his tools; but saying youre used more than a farmers tools implies that the tools too are worthless pieces of shit who have no value in life whatsoever

like this is just laughable as fuck and it's super justified to laugh at you considering who you are

By the way, saying you want to rape is literally just saying that youre a rapist if its in a non-joking way (it's still a bit bad to joke about it but yk), you cannot really walk around nor deny this fact at all especially if you yourself have a rape fetish- that's gen inexcusable.

Like I had my reasons to call you pap a rapist bc you are and I enjoy making you feel bad because guess what yea i like hurting disgusting prices of shit like you .

And also, you guys really love my dick huh xD by saying my name all around and praising me always and acting like i am your scorned ex-lover xDDD, hell it is quite obvious you guys really REALLY wanted my dick, but sadly for you guys, i would never touch you even if i was desperate- i would only touch my wife

OOO I hurt your feelings good bc I don't care I never did and. I only so called liked Ou bc you give me attention and yea say what you want in the private server enjoy talking about me bc this fills my ego badly it makes me feel powerful and thinkimg you thinking of me makes me ego bigger and bigger that you WANT IT to be like this with you

And also saying don't make the carrot move makes me proud like imagine a carrot hurting your ego and godlike view of yourself so much

I hope you even see carrots everyday and see how much i enjoy hurting your feelings xD

Come on write me in private and call me a psychopath and write to me about how much i ruined your pitiful internet life in every detail, please please try to make me feel bad and show shit to me that i don't like

I saw it so many times with people like you hurting yourselves and saying everyone hates you because nobody truly likes you, you make me always laugh with your drama show and it keeps me going to hurt you more !

I saw your pictures aka you face and DAMN - I won't be with you at all definitely even if I turn blind and deaf, I will say you are not my type.

And if you use this as a racist statement - first of all you use the n word and second looks don't qualify as a race- You are uglier than sin. Come on pap you are smarter than you give yourself credit.

You are physically as fake as your personality

Like you god darn smart, yet you are so bad in lying and trying to make me worse - WORSE HA. I told everyone my wrong doing and yet you want to desperately try to make me look more bad

bruh you have no proof - as you wrote as well about me.

" HE HAS NO PROOF + WHERE IS THE PROOF "

My proof is that I shove my middle finger up you god darn Brain that's what I do

my birthday is my birthday lilac fuck off to my speical day the day I was born for a reason, and it is to insult useless ass bitches like you with so called dick sucking mentality.

You pathetic like why ?? You want to be speical then be special like I am but my birthday is mine so to bad

Go suck my middle finger !

also big fat tw for talking abt paps transphobia + his blatant gore fetish

Also, pap/Endiveenjoyer acts like a typical cis man who wants trans men or masculine girls to be "girls" again because he hates them. This is obvious from how disgusted he is by trans women & men.

On top of that, if he sees a trans woman, he wants them to be a man again because, in his eyes, he only wants so-called "real" women. All of this comes from a pathetic, fake person who has written 100 times that he is a homosexual and a female just to make a statement and try to get away with saying racist and homophobic shit.

yep ! and btw, you can't be a lesbian if you like someone who is a dude or leans into masculinity, that defeats the entire point of being a lesbian and that therein makes you either bi or straight

because masculinity or being a transguy even if it's just a " societal concept !! " that is still a guy, that is still identifying and leaning into things that are literally associated and heavily aligned with being a dude, and if you can't handle that then idk maybe youre a terf or coping with the fact you are not actually attracted to women

Trans women are women, and you can't fucking tell anyone they're not. Either you like them because they are women, or you just heavily pretend to be a lesbian, because a lesbian likes women regardless of whether they are trans or not. It makes your whole history of being that completely fake as shit.

And just because a trans man isn't "pretty," as you wrote in your stupid hidden server... I bet there are hidden trans people in there who are too scared to come out because you have a god complex. You want to be a god and be loved like one because you aren't loved at all. Many were scared, and many just followed you. You hurt their feelings or say nasty shit when you don't get your way. You don't show a sliver of care, and they know that. I knew it, too. You didn't like me at all based on how you acted with me, just because I wasn't into gore and just liked how it looked in drawings.

And you hated me just because I chose my wife over you, you jealous fucker.

btw we only say this cauuseee well pap is blatantly a transphobic radfem lol

btw, heres some proof of him admitting that his eroguro fetishslop, is infact, a fetish !

Lilaccbush is claiming that I am "obsessed" and angry because she rejected me while I was drunk. Yes, I sent messages while drunk—and everyone knows people are unstable in that state. But once I sobered up and saw what happened, I wasn't angry or negative about it. I completely accept that she doesn't want a relationship; it’s really not a big deal to me. Why would I care?

The truth is, Lilaccbush is just mad that I don't like her anymore. She and SOMEONE have been talking about me behind my back in private DMs and calls, spreading STUFF without me knowing - as this SOMEONE WAS CLEARLY DISGUSTINGLY OBSESSED.

My actual issue is with how pap and she act.

Pap insulted my wife, who is autistic and thinks is funny because idk.

which I will never tolerate. Lilaccbush is older than me, yet she is too blind to see that Pap is just a narcissist using her for her gore art. He only likes people who feed his ego—he proved that to me when he began to talk to me JUST BECAUSE I drew something that featured a little bit of blood.

It is pathetic that Lilaccbush is trying to paint me as "bitter over a rejection" just to put me down. The reality is that I walked away because I refuse to be used by Pap anymore and I will always choose my wife over their toxic behavior

I have every single screenshot of my talks with Lilaccbush and the obsessed person who was talking about me. ( Who even wrote to me- that they did talk about me )