Borcsa

I hope that in this year to come, you make mistakes. Because if you are making mistakes, then you are making new things, trying new things, learning, living, pushing yourself, changing yourself, changing your world. You’re doing things you’ve never done before, and more importantly, you’re doing something.

I admired the foliage; the spring smell and that innocent of nature brought back my childhood’s feeling. A storm was threatening, so I went in, but there was no storm. Only I got melancholy; - why? I don’t care for even music today; it’s late, but I’m not sleepy; I don’t know what is wrong with me. And I’ve started my third decade! - The papers and posters have announced my concert, it’s to be in two days’ time, and it’s as if there were no such thing; it doesn’t seem to concern me. I don’t listen to the compliments; they seem to me stupider and stupider. I wish I were dead; and yet I should like to see my parents. […] What used to seem great today seems common is now incomparable, too great, too high. The people here are not my people; they’re kind, but kind from habit; they do everything too respectably, flatly, moderately. I don’t want even to think of moderation. I’m puzzled, I’m melancholy, I don’t know what to do with myself; I wish I weren’t alone! -