You guys loved the first prompt I posted so I thought I would crank out another :) Let me know if you enjoy this and would like more! I may have gotten a bit carried away with the length…
The two were lying down in Bakugou’s dorm bed, having finished their studying for the night. The boys made their best attempts to spend a little bit of quality time together a few times every week before they had to go to sleep in their separate rooms at U.A. It wasn’t that they were afraid of having a sleepover or two, but rather, though one of the boys would never admit it - they got way too enthusiastic and would want to have sleepovers all the time. It was disgustingly cute, though the other students avoided thinking about it. There was a good period of time that even Bakugou didn’t really want to study for their classes anymore, and would rather spend all his time wrapped up in the warmth of his boyfriend. They both decided for the sake of their grades and not unleashing the wrath of Aizawa, that they would limit themselves; sacrifices, indeed, had to be made.
Bakugou was mindlessly running his fingers through Kirishima’s soft hair. It was still wet from his shower that he took earlier, but Kirishima enjoyed the attention. “I’ve been thinking recently…”
Kirishima was used to Bakugou wanting to start vague when they spoke nowadays. The time he spent with Kirishima made him a bit more inclined to thinking about how he wanted the words they said in private to mean something. They were in their third year of highschool now, and Kirishima often reminded him to savor these moments. They were going by too fast.
Kirishima craned his neck upwards from Bakugou’s chest to look at his face, “Hm? About what?”
Bakugou took a moment to process his thoughts, “We’ve been together for a while now. But I…still sometimes feel…bad.”
“What on Earth could you feel bad about, Katsuki? Is something the matter?”
Bakugou had a hard time handling Kirishima when he used his first name, even now. Kirishima had this way about him that was so gentle when he said it despite his rough quirk.
“I want to apologize to you. For a lot of things.” Bakugou said flatly, not quite looking at his boyfriend, but still playing with his hair. Kirishima wanted to speak, but stopped himself. He propped himself upwards onto his elbow to look at Bakugou properly, his silence prompting Bakugou to continue.
“You’re just so…warm. To everyone. And I still can never fucking understand it. People love to be around you - even when you have that dumb smile on. You offer yourself to everyone in the worst circumstances, just because you care. You care so much, about everyone, about me, and I-” Bakugou started to stutter towards the end. He had the worst time accepting the love that was offered so freely to him. His hand began to still as Kirishima brought one of his arms to wrap around Bakugou more tightly in reassurance. There was so much Kirishima wanted to say, but he knew Bakugou, and he knew he needed to shut his mouth and let the man finish.
“…I want to be better. I want to be better for you. That’s all.” Bakugou finished, turning his face to look at Kirishima in the eye. Bakugou often tried to turn away from his feelings, both mentally and physically when he spoke about them, but their relationship was supposed to be built on respect and trust - the trust that their conversations were private and made with good intentions, respect to believe that the latter was true.
Kirishima could feel himself break down a bit at the vulnerability of his partner. He didn’t know what it was about Bakugou exactly - maybe the way that he could tell when they first became friends that Bakugou was so broken? That he wasn’t as put together as he seemed? That even though Bakugou was strong, calculating, and level-headed even in the bleakest of situations, that even he was human. Kirishima knew that pretty much like everyone else, Bakugou was someone who needed support, acceptance, and eventually, people to branch out and be friends with him. There was something about Bakugou’s demeanor that never deterred Kirishima, because Kirishima was his own man who believed in the goodness of people. Kirishima knew what it was like to not believe in himself, and thus made himself believe, not only in himself now, but others. Because other people believed in him. Kirishima was strong in ways that Bakugou wasn’t, enough for Kirishima to earn the friendship of someone still so inexplicably loyal.
“Thank you, Katsuki. What brought this on? Do you want to talk about it?” Kirishima spoke softly, bringing his face to lean against Bakugou’s chest once again. He resisted to cut Bakugou off earlier, but was learning to listen more to what his partner was thinking instead of just controlling the conversation.
Bakugou’s grip on Kirishima tightened, almost in repulsion of what he was about to say, “I was thinking back to all the dumbass things I’ve said to you - you of all people, and it made me sick. What the fuck was wrong with me?”
Kirishima was having trouble holding back now, “You’ve apologized to me so many times before, it’s really okay, I-”
Bakugou’s voice rose to what Kirishima would call a loud whisper, anger clear in his voice, “It’s not fucking okay, Eijirou. I was the biggest asshole in the world, but you’re still here, loving me the way you do, and it hurts me. I don’t deserve you, Eijirou, I don’t-”
Kirishima finally cut him off, angry now himself, and propped himself up a second time to look Bakugou directly in the eye. “No. You will not. Not again.”
Bakugou stopped himself, the severity of Kirishima’s glare letting him know a lecture was coming on.
“Katsuki. Yes you’ve said awful things before. But we’ve talked about it. You’re not the same person you were a couple of years ago. You’re different. You’re trying. You can’t compare yourself to me, and you most definitely cannot talk about deserving while I’m in the room, because I will kick your ass right out and you won’t even be able to beg me to get back in.”
Bakugou was beginning to do his weird scowling pout as Kirishima kept going, kind of looking at Kirishima but also trying to look away from the restrained rage emanating from the man in his arms.
Kirishima’s eyes looked like they were shining now, shifting from the original squinty glare he was giving Bakugou before, “I think you’re one of the most amazing guys I have ever met. And I wouldn’t be here, with you, if I didn’t think so. I know I’m a fun-loving guy, but even I wouldn’t be with someone who I didn’t think the world of.”
He took a pause, and moved both of his hands to cup the face of his scowling, silly boyfriend. “I have no idea how long it will take for you to understand how amazing you are. I can only give you so many compliments, which you know I love doing, but I need you to start treating yourself better. I’m so proud of you for improving, and I will always be here to encourage you for as long as I can, but you will only understand how far we’ve come until you realize how much progress you’ve made. I’m rambling - and I’m not mad at you - but I’m mad at you. I love you so much that I’m angry. Does that make sense? You know how much of a headache you give me?”
Bakugou was smirking now at Kirishima’s fake pain, hearing the three-letter-phrase he loved that often brought him back from his turmoil. Bakugou leaned in to plant a long, hard kiss on his best friend, taking his hand and moving it to the back of Kirishima’s hair. Bakugou pulled back after a few moments just to put back on a cocky grin, “Yeah, but you know how much I fucking love driving you crazy - one of my favorite past-times.”
Kirishima wasn’t putting up with his shit as he lowered his hands from Bakugou’s face. “Yes, I know very well. But are you hearing me? You also know how much I hate it when you degrade yourself.”
“Okay, Eijirou. I’m listening to you. I hear you. Thank you for putting up with my bullshit.” Bakugou pulled Kirishima in for a long hug, loving the scent of his cologne as he breathed it in. “We have a come a long way. I’ll try harder to help myself and I won’t worry you anymore,”
Kirishima chuckled to himself, “Alright, that’s the real bullshit right there. You always worry me, and that’s okay because I want to be here for you when you’re having trouble seeing yourself.”
Being Kirishima, he added in randomly, “Also, I’ve been thinking too you know - you act like such a hardass and try to be this big scary…I don’t know, angry grizzly-bear thing, but you’re really such a softie…it’s cute.” Kirishima was being goofy now, trying to get back at his annoying boyfriend.
“Oi, you’re pushing it there.” Bakugou’s lips were twitching in what would have been a smile - if he didn’t have such a huge ego.
Kirishima laughed into Bakugou’s shoulder, Bakugou seriously not letting go of him to give him more room, “Don’t blast me now, softie, or I may have to reveal your secrets to the rest of our class!”
“You wouldn’t fucking dare.”
“Hm…maybe? Maybe not? I don’t know, depends on what I’m feeling,” Kirishima trailed off, resting his hands on Bakugou’s upper back; it was one of his favorite parts of Bakugou’s body.
Bakugou became quiet. Maybe he was thinking? Or was tired? It was getting late, and the boys would have to separate soon. But he continued, “You know what I’m feeling right now?”
Kirishima was getting tired himself, yawning before replying with a muffled sound, “Mmm?”
“I really fucking love you,” Bakugou kissed the top of Kirishima’s forehead with a gentleness that no one else would ever be able to witness. Kirishima smiled to himself, content being with a man who promised to be better everyday, with his academics, training, and with Kirishima.
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