this could be us
but you’re (not) playing (trombone)
Sade Olutola
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Andulka

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@blueviolist
this could be us
but you’re (not) playing (trombone)

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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if only classical music wasn’t 15 minutes long for each piece and didn’t have titles like piano concerto no. 2 in E minor op. 27 V : aglio olio peperoncino waluigi
I see anything Shostakovich, I immediately go feral
other girls at my school: full makeup, long blonde hair, dresses, high heels, designer bags, blindly serve the state, don’t know the difference between atonality and chromaticism
me: glasses, short dark hair, anxious wreck, DOES know the difference between atonality and chromaticism, loves to make string players cry, would fist-fight stalin in a parking lot at 3 am, i am dmitri shostakovich
Stock Photo Flutes
The first thing to come up has gotta be at least sort of right, right?
nope never mind what the hecking daisies is happening here
that… that is a piccolo.
that is… I don’t even know what that is. what on earth.
here we have the classic “sideways-screechy-flute”
end my suffering
do not strum your flute jessica
well, I’m giving up on humanity
Again, the piccolo one is normal
I’m aware, the haha funny is supposed to be that it’s a picc and not a flute and yes I know piccolos are a kind of flute but it’s just a dumb post I made like 3 years ago please let me live
It chill jus didn’t know if ya knew

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Most opera divas that record solo albums tend to keep the cover traditional - featuring dreamy gazes, lavish dresses, and the occasional flower bouquet:
And then… there’s Cecilia Bartoli.
Bless her.
imagine hearing “hall of the mountian king” for the first time in 1875. the sheer chaos imagine being some norwegian aristocrat and sitting down for a nice day at the symphony and getting your entire wig and life snatched right before your very eyes
i’m just saying grieg went tf off!
Play those major sevenths with sex appeal
Can’t stop watching this

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Just looked at my sheet music and said (out loud) "What the fuck, I don't know how to read??"
oh, fucking mood
what the fuck is up y’all i’m depressed as shit and i haven’t touched my viola in like a month?????
I MADE THIS THING FOR YOU ALL. PLEASE FORGIVE ME FOR THE CAREERS I INEVITABLY LEFT OUT.
GUYS. THIS IS SO FUCKING AMAZING @howtomusicmajor YOU’RE A GENIUS AND I LOVE YOU
♥️💜♥️💜♥️
Note: music librarian falls under arts admin and stuff! I don’t know how I forgot it, my grad school had like one of the only two programs for that in the country lol
debussy was a weeb
I like that people keep reblogging this and not the version where I actually gave context

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string quartet quotes
my string quartet rehearses at a time when I’m playing viola and I’m very mentally exhausted so this is just some of the bullshit that I’ve made my quartet endure
“can we start at a healthy tempo?”
“it’s timmmeee fooorrrr dinnnerrrrrr” (this was at 4:00)
“sir?” I said when I accidentally hit a whiteboard spray bottle with my elbow in the middle of the piece
“sir??” I said when I couldn’t find my sheet music in my folder
“sir???” I said when my A string fine tuner wouldn’t turn
“should we transpose up a half step?”
“I think the melody should be pp and the cello’s pizzicato should be triple forte.”
“did you guys hear that mozart’s been dead for 228 slutty, slutty years?”
“we should sightread this during the performance.”
“one time I got a hickey on the right side of my neck and I tried to convince my parents that I was practicing my violin on the wrong side.”
“now that I’m a violist, it’s my job to show up late to rehearsal.”
“can you all back off because this is my time to shine.”
*absentmindedly humming the mii theme because I have issues*
*eating a cookie during rehearsal* “brain food”
*clapping on the offbeats during the slow movement of the first tchaik quartet to make it sound Funky*
*acting like I’m about to bite the tip of my bow but I never do*
“if that annoying guy with perfect pitch says that we’re flat we can just say that we’re using pythagorean tuning”
“parallel fifths. WOAH there tchaikovsky.”
“should I ask that elderly man if I can have his purple and green striped sweater?”
“I wish I had a beard.”
me before every rehearsal “oh crap I have to learn viola”
“my plastic viola has bloodstains on the inside.”
“oh this? it’s a bandage I put on the bow because it was falling apart, and bandaids make everything better.”
“my viola is a fat baby. chunky.”
“sometimes when I put my head on the plastic chinrest, it digs into the tailpiece and causes the lowest strings to detune to the point that they’re unplayable, so look forward to that.”
*making annoying gestures and faces at my quartet in the hallway*
*generally having more energy than me or anyone else can handle*
*not getting very much done*
imagine hearing “hall of the mountian king” for the first time in 1875. the sheer chaos imagine being some norwegian aristocrat and sitting down for a nice day at the symphony and getting your entire wig and life snatched right before your very eyes