Neglected Reader x John Constantine
Solitude can be a sickness, loss damnation, and faith salvation.
Trigger warning: sacrifice, murder, possession, and unwanted touch. Loosely based on Nosferatu (2024)
She was not a wanted child; she knew that much at eight years old. Her fatherĀ wasnātĀ mean, but heĀ wasnātĀ warm either. Her whole life had been the mansion, Alfred, and Father.Ā At first, sheĀ didnātĀ understand the absence of love he gave her.Ā
That changed when twelve-year-old Richard Grayson came into their lives. ItĀ didnātĀ matter how angry RichardĀ got;Ā Father was there for him. AndĀ so,Ā her chest ached at the sight, her heart beating fast and painfully against her ribcage.Ā
She didnāt know how to ask to be seen, and she was afraid Father would never learn how to look at her.Ā
SheĀ couldnātĀ count how many times she had sat alone in the little chapel behind the mansion, praying, finding comfort in the chirping birds and the breeze blowing through the leaves.Ā
Since childhood, she had prayed for the city, never feeling close enough to Alfred or Father to pray for them. But solitude was devouring her, and it had never felt as big as it did in the twilight when a heavy storm hit while she was in the chapel. There was no light, so night fell while she surrounded herself with dozens of candles. It was a horrible night: the stained glassĀ trembledĀ under the heavy wind, and the thunder was so powerful that she was afraid one of theĀ big treesĀ outside the chapel could crush the structure.Ā
No one came for her,Ā not Alfred, not Father. She had begged someone, anyone, to love her. SheĀ cried,Ā she pleaded, while the storm drowned her voice.Ā
She walked alone the next morning to theĀ mansion.Ā Ā
"Itās quite early to go pray, donāt you think?"Ā
While Richardās words wereĀ not unkind, it still made her feel ashamed,Ā to be so unimportant that no one noticed her missing all night.Ā Ā
She was fourteen when Father and Richard fought, and Jason came into their lives. Richard had never been her brother. But Jason? Jason was. He was her little brother, the one who would seek her out, who whispered in a small voice that he loved her.Ā
Jason was her whole heart, her true first family. His night activity sometimes made it impossible toĀ keep in touchĀ daily, but they put letters in each otherās rooms;Ā reminders of how much the other meant, wishes of good luck, or even simpleĀ good morningsĀ or good nights.Ā
About aĀ month before her eighteenth birthday, Jason died while she was away visiting colleges. Bruce said he was in the wrong place at the wrong time; still, she knew it was his fault.Ā Ā
"He chose this," it was barely a whisper from Bruce, but she heard it. "He didnāt hear me."Ā
"He was a kid,"Ā maybe itĀ was the venomous voice that surprised him;Ā maybe itĀ was that sheĀ didnātĀ keep her usual silence. "He wanted to make you proud, and you pushed him over and over to be better, to do better." Bruce looked at her like he was seeing her for the first time. "He wanted your love, and all you gave him was your disappointment."Ā
That was the last time they saw each other for a long time. She walked away the next morning and never looked back.Ā Ā
Jason wasĀ gone,Ā her family was gone. And once again, she was all by herself.Ā Ā
The grief was so overwhelming that sheĀ couldnātĀ even bear to be in the States, where the Justice League were news at least once a day, where Bruce Wayne or Batman was mentioned without fail. She moved to England, started college in English literature, and used her free time to help in a nearby church.Ā Ā
She graduated with few friends by her side, so the loneliness that had feasted on her since youth came back with full revenge;Ā deeper than before, scratching over theĀ scarĀ Jasonās absence left in her heart.Ā
It was only while she kneeled before God that she felt she could breathe. She asked the reverend mother to join, to let her pledge her life to God.Ā
SheĀ didnātĀ say yes, but she let her stay and help the other novices.Ā
At first, John Constantine was just anotherĀ congregant, whoĀ didnātĀ stay for long but kept coming back for holy water. One unlucky day, he came just when she was cleaning theĀ stoup. HeĀ looked aggravatedĀ at her sightĀ and demanded she make him more holy water.Ā Ā
"Just pray!"Ā HeĀ demanded, putting a bottle of water in her hands. "Come on, sister. I donātĀ haveĀ all day."Ā
She wanted to say sheĀ wasnātĀ aĀ sister butĀ decided itĀ couldnātĀ hurt to bear with him just this time.Ā She made a quick prayer, enough to see the man mutter a short thanks and run out.Ā Ā
"You are not a sister," he said a week later.Ā Ā
"Never said I was," she replied.Ā Ā
His statement confused her.Ā
"Because I gave you back the water you told me to pray at?"Ā
"No, because I need real holy water to do my job," he said. "And somehow your fake water was better than my usual holy water."Ā
She lookedĀ bewilderedĀ at him.Ā HeĀ didnātĀ wait for her reply before putting his palm over her forehead.Ā
"A priestess," he confirmed in seconds. "Who do you pray to?"Ā
"What?" This man had only confused her with each interaction.Ā
"You must be a favorite if they marked you without your knowledge."Ā
"Sir, if you are drunk, we have coffee next to the confessional."Ā
He laughed at her words.Ā
"Iām tipsy, love. Not drunk." The deep smell of cheap perfume and whiskey hit her nose. "Youāre American; itās more common to find priestesses in Asia," he replied like that meant something to her. "Donāt go around praying for anyone. YouāreĀ luckyĀ Iām not that greedy." He warned her before he left.Ā
She hoped not to see him again.Ā
And that hope held true for a while, until a chilly evening in November a somber group came upon the church. There was something wrong in the way they walked or spoke, but the reverend mother received them anyway. Just like her, the other sisters felt nervous around the group, but they followed orders and started to serve bowls of soup.Ā
The foodĀ fellĀ to theĀ floor before anyone could tasteĀ it;Ā in a moment, sweet BethanyĀ laidĀ on the floor in a pool of blood. Before the blink of an eye, three other sisters fell, and forĀ a momentĀ she comforted herself thinking of Jason.Ā
She had never searched for death, but she was not afraid of it. There was little she held dear in this world, so she thought of how she could hold her little brother again if she held on through a glimpse of pain.Ā Ā
The pain came, but it was not her end.Ā Ā
"Tie her up in the middle," a familiar voice said. "I have kept the little lamb pure; this works better when they are free of vows."Ā
Her vision was blurry. They laid her on the cold floor, and with the tips of her fingers she touched the sticky, clotted blood under her. Her voice was barely a whisper, begging them to stop; they ignored her in favor of drawing some runes on her head and arms.Ā
AĀ cacophonyĀ of voices started to rise. The words were confusing, like a bastard version of Latin, full of wrongness, and before she could start to decipher them, an overwhelming heat started to burn her. She could barely hear her own scream over the pain that clouded her mind. ItĀ didnātĀ stop; this pain was not over. It lasted so long she believed herself in hell.Ā
SheĀ wantedĀ itĀ toĀ stop.Ā
She had been good all her life.Ā
But she was not strongĀ asĀ Bruce.Ā
Or smart enough to follow her instinct.Ā
She trusted these people needed help.Ā
SheĀ wasnātĀ deserving ofĀ this pain.Ā
The fire was festering inside her, likeĀ aĀ sickness,Ā almost nearĀ her heart... a whisper was all she heard, and all she needed.Ā
Her scream ceased, and with a hoarse voice she started to pray;Ā not like she had learned in that place, but how she used to pray in the small chapel behind Wayne Manor.Ā The fire inside her persisted, but it was tolerable; it faded with each word out of her mouth.Ā Ā
"She is blessed," a voice rose in panic. "Fuck! Fuck!"Ā
"So that means she has even greater power! Keep theĀ ritual!Ā
"AndĀ riskĀ being cursed myself? You know what happens when someone kills a favored priestess?" A bitter laugh left one of the menās lips. "Iām out."Ā
It must have been desperation; they hit her with something heavy on the head. She lost consciousness, and while her mind was far away in darkness, near the veil of death, an entity that had been lurking around her since childhood entered her body.Ā
Her eyes opened; there was no sclera, only deep blackness. Her face was full of joy, and a wide smile bloomed from her lips as her face turned to her captors.Ā
"Oh,Ā reverendĀ mother, IĀ mustĀ thankĀ youĀ forĀ openingĀ theĀ pathĀ toĀ myĀ beloved."Ā TheĀ voiceĀ thatĀ sproutedĀ fromĀ herĀ mouthĀ wasĀ masculine,Ā withĀ aĀ roughnessĀ likeĀ heĀ hadĀ beenĀ screamingĀ forĀ aĀ longĀ time;Ā itĀ soundedĀ decayed. "LetĀ meĀ payĀ you,"Ā theĀ voiceĀ hissedĀ withĀ aĀ delightedĀ laugh.Ā
The shock of this presence was forgotten when the body of the woman they had tried to sacrifice lifted into the air...Ā the possessed body rose first with her chest, like a broken doll lifted by a hand; the smile never left the creatureās face.Ā They screamed, because the entity that had opened its way to her was rotten, and smiling so sweetly that not even fear was enough to describe their horror.Ā
Those who tried to run were the first to break, their ribs opening like a flower and piercingĀ throughĀ flesh in a grotesque painting.Ā
"Ah, I fear Iām quite a jealous creature," it laughed. "This little lamb is mine, mother." Her hands traveled from her ribcage to her breast. "And you dared to touch it, but I thank you for bringing her closer to me," it said, while her hands kept traveling to her neck. "So,Ā I will be merciful."Ā
The smile grew so impossibly big that the skin looked about to rip open. Black fire surrounded the reverend mother, turning her to ash in a few seconds. The rest of the attendantsĀ lookedĀ in fear; the last thing they saw was the creatureās smile while it kept touching its host body.Ā Ā
"Alright, mate, itās time to go."Ā
The creature turned to see a blond man in a trench coat, his hand glowing with golden energy before he summoned a ball thatĀ impactedĀ its belovedās chest. It burned their connection; he let out a raw scream before cutting himself out of her body. ItĀ didnātĀ matter;Ā he had marked her. All he had to do was wait, and so he would, patiently.Ā
Her first instinct was to bolt out and scream for help.Ā
"Shhhh, itās alright, love. You got yourself in quiteĀ aĀ mess."Ā
She recognized him as the man who had called her a priestess, and before that night she had called him a crazy drunk.Ā
"A voice," she barely whispered. "A voice told me to pray."Ā
The man studied her in silence.Ā
"Did they hit you when you were praying?"Ā HeĀ asked before drinking from the flask hidden in his pocket.Ā
"Then you left a door open toĀ intruders. Untrained priestesses are prone to possession, and one quite powerful like youĀ areĀ even worse. The more power you have, the bigger the risk."Ā
"You didnāt tell me that last time."Ā
"You didnāt believe it, and itās not my problem."Ā
Her reply surprised him; more people would have used the opportunity to blame him.Ā Ā
"I could teach you how to close the door, with a lock and everything, but you would have to make lots of holy water, now that my favorite church is a crime scene."Ā
Maybe itĀ wasĀ theĀ skeptical tone, but it made her laugh. SheĀ wasnātĀ in the public scene like the rest of the Waynes, but she had a big trust fund.Ā
She found out his name was John Constantine. He was quite rude, a heavy smoker, andĀ kind ofĀ a functional drunk,Ā butĀ weeks later she found herself enjoying his snarky remarks, his bratty attitude over ādemon assholesā who didnāt know how to stay in hell, and his rogue, handsome face that looked one blink away from sleeping in the streets.Ā
"Well, I would say your soul is heavily guarded," John said. "Congratulations, love."Ā
He expected her to say goodbye; he had never beenĀ very goodĀ at keeping friends.Ā
"I would like to stay," she replied. "I want to use this power to help, but more than anything, I wish to stay with you, John."Ā
John knew that if she stayed, he would not be capable of letting her go ever again. He had given her a way out, and he was not a saint,Ā just a functional drunk magician who wasĀ way tooĀ selfish... so he kissed her, tame at first, but when she replied, he let his arms holdĀ all ofĀ her while he deepened the kiss.Ā
He had never liked to do good girls; he had been happier with messy relationships, doomed to failĀ āquickĀ affairs from job to jobāĀ and heĀ couldnātĀ even remember the last lover who had been human.Ā Ā
But it had been such a long time sinceĀ heādĀ had a partner;Ā not just a lover, but someone steady with whom he could be vulnerable. Because she had his back, just like he had hers.Ā Maybe thisĀ was his sweetĀ tooth,Ā making its way into his taste in partners.Ā
Who would haveĀ thought aboutĀ it? TheĀ HellblazerĀ suddenly was a force of two people. His love not only had a knack for praying and making holy water,Ā she wasĀ quite good at sealing and tying... God, she really was quite good at tying, and he got jealous of the few demons who had gotten the pleasure of feeling her bindingĀ them.Ā
And his good girl got quite cheekyĀ overĀ time.Ā At her core she was goodnessĀ incarnated, but she and he had lots of fun traveling from city to city before returning to their home in the House of Mystery. The house made sure to show who was its favorite, and it was not John, but he could not blame the sentient property. His sweet love was his favorite too.Ā Ā
So,Ā when he told her that Batman had contacted him, the silence that followed made him worried.Ā
"Are youĀ going toĀ accept?"Ā
"ItĀ soundsĀ likeĀ a drag," heĀ confessed.Ā Ā
"You could do good work."Ā
"Not we?"Ā HeĀ asked, confused.Ā Ā
"I have not seen my father in a long time, and I donāt wish to change that." He gasped at her words.Ā
"B-Batman?"Ā HeĀ stuttered.Ā
"Yes, but I know him better as Bruce Wayne."Ā
"The dumbest millionaire is a facade? Damn, he is good." He halted for a moment. "Love, are you rich?"Ā
"No, I should have some sort of relation with my father for that," she told him. "I have a trust fund,Ā wealthy enough, but not rich."Ā
"WealthyĀ isĀ fineĀ forĀ me." HeĀ litĀ aĀ cigaretteĀ betweenĀ hisĀ lips. "ThenĀ weĀ hateĀ theĀ Waynes? AndĀ fuckĀ Batman andĀ hisĀ justiceĀ dummies?"Ā
She laughedĀ atĀ his way to comfort her. John was loyal, at his core he was a good man, but he was egoistic enough toĀ chooseĀ her over duty.Ā Ā
"Itās not that deep. I was not a wanted child," she confessed. "I could have lived with his apathy, but I resented him when my younger brother died. Jason was everything." Her voice was barely a whisper, but the deep emotion in her eyes showed her sadness. "He was a bright boy, my only brother, with a love for books and a need for Fatherās approval." She had not talked about Jason since leaving Gotham. "I was searching for colleges in New York, far away from Gotham but near enough to visit him. I planned a whole life where my brother would even stay the weekend with me. I was going to rent an apartment with two bedrooms. We would have hit all the big bookstores so he could choose all the books he wanted, have fun without the pressure of being in Gotham...Ā so for a moment he could be a kid and not Robin."Ā
JohnĀ studiedĀ her for a moment.Ā
"Maybe all that life died with him, but not his older sister," he said. "And Iāve got the feeling you lived like a ghost for a long time. You will always love your brother, sweetheart, but it doesnāt make you a bad person choosing happiness."Ā
"I know." Her eyes were red with unfailing tears. "But I couldnāt accept living while my brother was gone." A whimper broke out of her mouth. "But since I started to help you, I have been thinking how terribly happy he would have been to see all the magic,Ā my power as a priestess."Ā
āA fan of magic, uh?ā HeĀ blowsĀ aĀ smoke cloudĀ āMy love,Ā you'reĀ a priestess,Ā even if death his soul would cherish your blessingāĀ
ThatĀ got her attention.Ā
āIt would reach him?āĀ Ā
āSure, peopleĀ underestimated a blessing, butĀ ItĀ soakĀ you in good luck. If heĀ wasĀ alive, it could helpĀ him miss aĀ strayĀ bullet. While it would not avoid death, it can improveĀ the chanceĀ to get out fromĀ aĀ bad situationā he explains āI imagine your brother must be in heaven, so it would help him feel youĀ near,Ā evenĀ get some nice candyāĀ Ā
A shrineĀ gotĀ a permanent spot on their home.Ā One day ConstantineĀ foundĀ himself talking toĀ JasonāsĀ photo.Ā
āI love your sister, so while I canāt ask you, I think the less I can do is informing youĀ that...ā He openedĀ the box in his hand āIām about to commit myself to her, for ever and ever and all that chit chatāĀ heĀ hidesĀ the box once again āWish me luck, KidāĀ
She says yes, they have a long night of love making, and JohnĀ startsĀ his own ritual ofĀ askingĀ JasonĀ for āluckā on his way to a job.Ā Ā
The years are good forĀ them;Ā danger comes and goes, but they overcome it together.Ā Ā
Sometimes John lends a hand to Justice Dark, BatmanĀ gruntsĀ hisĀ disapprovalĀ everyĀ timeĀ heĀ rejectsĀ to form part of it;Ā and while he can be a prick, he is a loyal husband.Ā
No life is perfect,Ā but togetherĀ the daysĀ feel quiteĀ unforgettable.Ā
Then,Ā little townsĀ aroundĀ New Jersey startedĀ to get sick, and allĀ cluesĀ pointedĀ to Gotham, the city his wife avoided for the longest time becomes hell in a matter of a few days.Ā Ā
Sickness spreads, fog torrentĀ by the streets, andĀ at nightĀ electricityĀ witherĀ leaving peopleĀ turningĀ theirĀ desperationĀ to candles.Ā
They have been there for two days when his wife notices her power is getting weak. AllĀ these yearsĀ they have neverĀ searchedĀ for the source ofĀ themĀ butĀ is not hard toĀ figure out they are tied to Gotham.Ā Ā They go to the first place she has everĀ prayed, to the mansionĀ that neverĀ feltĀ like home.Ā
Bruce Wayneās affairs are veryĀ public;Ā theyĀ know of his flock ofĀ childrenĀ butĀ when theyĀ arriveĀ is madeĀ very clearĀ they ignore he hadĀ anĀ older daughter.Ā Ā
The reunion isĀ awkward.Ā Ā
AlfredĀ has toĀ take the kids away.Ā Ā
āConstantine, what are you doingĀ hereĀ with my daughter?āĀ
āNot surprised to know IĀ know youĀ are Batman?āĀ
āIĀ noticedĀ the second you came hereā his sight turned to his daughter āthis aĀ dangerousĀ breach of information, I hope youĀ donātĀ have a tendency of trust everyone you knowāĀ
She sent him a dirty look.Ā
āRelax, mateā ConstantineĀ pullsĀ himselfĀ in frontĀ of hisĀ women "orĀ would you like if I called father-in-law? SheĀ didnātĀ tell me right away you were Batman, but when you invite me to your superĀ prudesĀ clubĀ she had to told me,Ā IāmĀ not down to do business without my wifeāĀ
For the first time in his life, heĀ seesĀ Batman gapeĀ
Ā āDonāt concern yourself withĀ ourĀ presence, we are here for a job, not some unwanted family reunionāĀ she told him trying to hide her rage.Ā Ā
HisĀ wife'sĀ wordĀ appears to doĀ theĀ trick;Ā Wayne looks gutted and guilty.Ā Constantine knows he was never the best father to his wife, butĀ toĀ never told any of his other kids she existed?Ā AndĀ let'sĀ not forget the little entitled Robin believing himself as the only blood kid and trying to stab his wifeĀ while calling her a liar.Ā Ā
Yeah, familyĀ reunion sucks.Ā Ā
So,Ā they make themself scarce and go straight to the chapel behind the manor.Ā Ā
They stepĀ inĀ anĀ everyĀ candleĀ lightĀ up in seconds.Ā
In the middle a dark formĀ rise, veil hiding her factions.Ā
āIām Gothamā she tells themĀ āan entity formed by the hopes and fears of the citizens, while my streets are dangerous there is a pride forĀ thoseĀ thanĀ survive the hardness on it, I held dear my people, even those than hurt others, is my nature to love all of youā she confess āOf course I haveĀ those that I like more;Ā like my knights, but isĀ youĀ whoseĀ I love the mostā she smile serene āyou were young, but I heardĀ yourĀ prayersĀ for the city, I think you believed you prayed forĀ the people on it, but in a way Iām the people of GothamāĀ
āSo, you made her a priestessā spoke Constantine āuntrained, by the wayāĀ
āIt was my mistake; I have never got one beforeā she walks to them āin my need toĀ soakĀ you inĀ myĀ love, I fear you gained unwanted attention"Ā
āUnintentionally or not, the cityĀ lies on top ofĀ anĀ old curse. A being than have been prisoned for centuries;Ā I donāt know if it wasĀ insaneĀ before orĀ ages ofĀ solitude has made them fall in madness, but when you prayed to me,Ā the creature heardĀ youā her voice lower an octave āHe couldnāt reach you while you were under my protection, but that night when you wereĀ possessedĀ a fracture was created, so tiny that I didnāt feel it waiting thereāĀ
āAnd now he actsā Johns hear his wife speaking ābut he spread sickness through towns, why not through me?āĀ
āHe fancies himself in love withĀ youā Gotham reveals.Ā
āOh, fuck no!ā curses John āI already putĀ aĀ ring on it, she is taken! Very taken!āĀ
āPlease tell me he didnāt fall in love with me when I was a kid, oh my godā his wife made a sound of disgustĀ āIt was bad enough I got one possession, but this is wayĀ creepierāĀ
āWe must act with haste before he regains his full powerāĀ Gotham told them āIĀ triedĀ to hold him, but he hasĀ acquiredĀ help, and something rotten isĀ poisoningĀ me. You must have feel it already, my priestess, our power isĀ fadingāĀ she warns āI canāt keep this form for long, call for me if you are in needāĀ
The candlesĀ blowĀ out withĀ GothamĀ leave.Ā Ā
JohnĀ pulls his wife to him andĀ hugsĀ herĀ desperately.Ā
āWe can quit this jobā he told herĀ āThat horrible family reunion must have been our final warning that this was a bad ideaāĀ
āIf he breaksĀ free,Ā he will follow meāĀ Ā
He hates that she isĀ right butĀ canātĀ stop feeling they are at the edge of the cliff.Ā Ā
SheĀ takesĀ his face between herĀ hands;Ā they kiss briefly.Ā Ā
āYou and me,Ā allĀ thatĀ mattersāĀ
āYou and meā repeat John in a whisper.Ā
All goes to hell in few days.Ā Ā
I have plans for a second part, but Iām a little stuck with my ideas, so any suggestion is welcome. Iām thinking of doing a POV from Jason, but itās possible this might end like Nosferatuāyeah, not a happy ending. This is the calm before the storm.
And Iām thinking of using Barbatos instead of Nosferatu, or just leaving the monster nameless