blowhomo

i wish i could order food to be delivered right to my bed, it’s getting really hard to walk around

It’s so funny how hard this kink is taking over my life. Getting stuffed to the point of wheezing and wobbling every day & making myself horrifically gassy on a regular basis just to be able to get off. Sometimes I even get a bit taken aback, tbh, when reality hits me. I mean, I’m eating like absolute shit, I feel sluggish and out of shape, I’m constantly painfully bloated, I’m panting and whimpering by the time I get back to my dorm, and I’ve intentionally fucked up my digestion all because I thought it would be hot to fart constantly (it is). I think most people would stop at this point, or at least get a little concerned. Me? I’m just going to keep going. Keep getting worse. Turn myself into a slobbish spectacle, a cautionary tale.

Tbh the rare moments of regret and shock are one of the hottest parts of this for me. It’s rare as fuck, but occasionally I catch myself absolutely taken aback by how far I’ve let myself go, how much absolutely irreparable damage I’ve done to my skin and how genuinely unrecognizable I’ve gotten. My gut hangs out of half of my shirts. I’m getting increasingly sore and out of breath walking to class, I’ve fucked my digestion to give myself more gas - something I didn’t even used to be into until I forced myself to get off to nothing but farts for months and wrecked my eating habits purely because I was curious how badly I could corrupt myself - and I just genuinely feel unhealthy as fuck. My face is covered in acne, there are bags beneath my eyes, my double chin sags beneath my puffy face. My gut’s starting to bloat up with visceral fat, firm on the top and sagging at the bottom. If I wanted to turn back and slow down, now would probably be the time, but I know I’m never going to ditch the urge to grow myself fatter. Might as well just double down and keep speeding up the gains, right?